The Life Of Trans Phan

I forgive you

"Hey Phil, want to come play Mario Karts?" Dan shouts through the wall. Phil groans, wishing he could but knowing that there's no way if he wanted to get all this work done.

"Not now Dan, I've got too much work to finish," He yells back, sipping his coffee, willing himself to stay awake.

"Fine, be boring," Dan shouts. Phil rolls his eyes, sighing as he eyes all the paperwork in front of him. He had so much paperwork to complete, as well as an amazingphil video he needed to edit and upload tonight. He felt like he was drowning.

He wished that Dan would help him instead of playing Mario karts, he really did. If he was helping him, not only would it be more fun, but he'd be finished in a couple of hours. But Dan, as much he loved him, was completely useless when it came to paperwork or adult stuff of any kind. Actually, Dan was pretty useless when it came to being a grown up at all! He couldn't even do the washing for god's sake! No, anything that he didn't want to do would be Phil's responsibility. Phil had to do all the paperwork, he had to pay the bills, and he had to cook, clean, everything! It was wearing him down and he didn't know much longer he could do this.

Staring down at all the work he had to do, a tear started falling down his cheek. All he wanted to do was sleep and play Mario karts with his best friend, but he couldn't, because Dan was too lazy and useless to fucking help him! Angry, he stormed into Dan's bedroom where he was playing rainbow road and turned the TV off.

"Hey! I was in 1st place!" Dan exclaims, standing up to face Phil.

"I don't fucking care Dan! Why can't you do something useful instead of playing stupid games all day huh?" He yells, tears falling down his cheeks because he's so tired and so fucking stressed. Dan stares at him in shock, trying to work out what caused this outburst.

"Phil, what's wrong?" He asked quietly, worried about his best friend.

"You want to know what's fucking wrong?! Maybe it's the fact that I'm drowning in work, our fucking work, and you're just playing video games! Maybe it's the fact that my best friend is so fucking useless!" He screams, scaring Dan so much it doesn't even register than Phil called him useless.

"I'm sorry Phil, you know I don't know how to do those things," He whispers, getting, even more, concerned.

"Well, why don't you learn?! Why can't you learn to do basic adult things instead of being so fucking useless and leaving it all to me! Because there are so many things I want to do, but I can't because I have to do all of our work! I need to upload an amazingphil video tonight, but I've not even started editing it yet because I'm too fucking busy!" He yells.

"Why don't you teach me then?" Dan asks, just wanting Phil to stop yelling.

"Because I don't have the time Dan!" He screams, "I'm so busy doing all of your stupid work for you because you're so useless! You know what; you're so fucking useless you can't even decide what gender you fucking are!" He yells. When he realises what he said, his face goes white, his eyes going wide, "Dan, Dan I'm so sorry, I didn't mean that, I-"

"Get out," Dan says calmly.

"Dan, I'm so sorry, I swear I didn't mean that-"

"Get the fuck out of my room Phil!" He yells, tears welling in his eyes.

"Dan-"

"Out!" He yells, tears dropping down his cheeks. Phil decides to just do as he says and leaves his room, going back to his own room and getting on with his work, completely stressed and crying. As mad as he was with Dan, he still loved him and couldn't believe he'd said that. Dan being gender fluid was never a problem to him, he was still his best friend, he was still the Dan he loved. Phil hated himself for saying that.

Later in the evening, Phil decided that he had to go and try to apologise to Dan. Yes, he was still mad, stressed and extremely tired, but he couldn't focus knowing that Dan was so mad at him. Phil got up and left his room, going over his apology in his head, praying that Dan would forgive him. However, when he turns the corner, he sees something he didn't expect to see.

In the middle of the living room was a blanket fort and a very busy Dan. He was currently setting up his laptop and Phil slowly started to understand what he was doing.

"Hey Dan," He said nervously.

"Hey Phil," Dan replied, just as nervously, getting up and walking over to Phil, "Look, I'm really sorry I left all the work to you, I swear it won't happen again. It's just, I've never lived on my own, and I've never had to be independent. So I just never learnt to do things for myself. But I swear I'm going to learn. But in the meantime, I made a blanket fort. There is pizza, snacks and loads of movies to help you relax,"

"Dan, that's really sweet of you, but I really don't have time, I've got way to much stuff to do!" Phil said regretfully, the blanket fort looked so absolutely perfect.

"Come with me," Dan replied, taking Phil's hand and leading him into the office, "Look, I finished editing your video, a Gaming channel video and did most of the paperwork for the BBC,"

"Oh my gosh, Dan," He gasped, looking at his perfectly edited video and all the finished paperwork.

"So now you have time to relax right?" Dan asked, looking hopefully at his best friend.

"Yeah of course! Oh my gosh Dan, this is amazing! Thank you so much!" Phil exclaimed, wrapping his arms around Dan.

"Don't thank me, I should have been doing this instead of playing video games, it wasn't fair to leave all the hard work to you," Dan told him, "I'm going to learn how to do bills and other adulty shit. I shouldn't have to depend on you so much,"

"I don't mind you depending on me," Phil whispers, "But I'd be great if you could help out sometimes,"

Dan pulled Phil closer to him, wanting his best friend as close to him as possible. He hated fighting with Phil more than anything.

"And Dan, I'm so so so so sorry about what I said. I can't believe I insulted your gender; I hate myself so much for that. I swear I didn't mean it, you know I love you right?" He apologised. He knew that didn't even start to cut it, but he didn't know what else to say.

"I forgive you," Dan sighed, still hurt by the comment. He knew Phil didn't mean it, though. He was just angry, "but don't ever say anything like that again. I get it if you're angry, but that doesn't give you the right to insult my gender."

"I know, I really am sorry," Phil told him sincerely.

"Okay," Dan smiled, "And I love you too."