Chapter 37
Chance
The sky was clear and the place was at peace. Silay na silay ang sikat ng araw sa itaas, pero kahit gano'n pa man, hindi masakit ang epekto nito sa aking balat. Siguro dahil mahangin, o dahil maaga pa naman.
Xydon is standing beside me in front of Dwieya's tomb. Simula nang dumating siya rito ay wala siyang imik kahit isang salita. I didn't even expect him to come here early. Ang sabi ko ay alas otso, pero nagulat ako nang alas siete pa lang ay nandito na rin siya.
"I know we're not married. I just really want to give her what I think she deserves... That's why I gave her your name."
It was actually a tough decision for me. Sabi ko noon, hindi naman deserve ni Xydon, pero deserve naman ng anak ko. I was torn, but I still chose what's better for my first baby.
"Thank you," bulong niya. Nahimigan ko ang panghihina roon.
Tumango ako at pasimple siyang tinignan. Sadness and guilt were visible in his emotion. Nakapamulsa siya, maayos pa rin naman ang tindig, o siguro pinipilit lang ang sarili para magmukhang maayos.
He was silent for a long time. I feel like he's talking to our baby secretly. Gusto ko siyang iwan kasama si Dwieya, pero ayaw ko namang istorbohin siya.
After a long while, he finally talked.
"I am sorry... Things could've been different if I didn't mess up." He sighed. "I'm... I'm dying in regret, Uoiea. If only... I could bring back time, I will for you and for Dwieya..."
My eyes were glued to him. My head is facing his side. Diretso lang ang katawan ko sa... puntod ng anak ko.
"Unfortunately, we could no longer..." Binalik ko na ang mga mata ko harap.
I know Dwieya is happy right now. Nakilala niya na ang Daddy niya. I think our baby is watching right now. Nakagat ko ang ibabang labi ko habang ang mga mata ay nanatili na lamang sa isang pwesto.
"Do you... really loathe me so much? Hindi mo na ba... ako mapapatawad?"
Now, it's his turn to look at me.
I breathed. "What really happened, Xydon?" mabagal at mahina kong tanong sa kan'ya. "I really want to know... Bakit? Paano?"
A lot of questions have been wandering in my head, but right now, I couldn't let everything out.
Something feels like banging my heart. We have loved each other so much before. He have loved me so well. Kahit matagal na, alam ko pa rin kung paano niya ako minahal. Ang honestly, it's still my favorite form of loving. Not until he cheated on me...
"I know I've been really selfish. I was so invested with my dreams for us that I failed to keep the person behind those dreams."
We're now both looking in front. Hindi alintana ang liwanag na bigay ng araw. Tahimik lang ako. Nasasaktan pa rin...
"I know you so well, but I still failed to provide your needs. Simpleng pagsabi ng totoo, hindi ko pa nagawa... I was just really consumed by my cowardice. Takot ako na... magbago ang pakikitungo mo sa akin sa oras na malaman mong ginugulo ako ng kapatid mo, at nagkakasama kami dahil sa business. I didn't want you to overthink."
I huffed, but it almost turned out a sarcastic sigh. Hindi naman marahas, pero napatungo siya.
"And because of that, you totally lost me... And I overthink those times as well. You know I'd understand if you'll just explain... Iniintindi naman kita, 'di ba? O siguro, immature talaga ang tingin mo sa akin dahil mas bata ako sa'yo."
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العاطفيةMONTEVINSKI SERIES #2 Uoiea Ishan Villaceran is one of the popular Archers. A hopeless daughter who always feel unlovely and a second option. And here comes the embodiment of a Greek God, Xydon Zeus Montevinski, a hot football player who can always...
