BALANCE | A Star Wars story

V

     My feet drag along the cracked concrete, a heavy sense of defeat weighing on my mind. Water drips in puddles around me and my arms are crossed protectively over my chest to try to keep away the biting cold that has begun to settle.

     I don't have any credits.

     I don't have any clean, dry clothes.

     I don't have a way off this dismal planet.

     What am I going to do?

      That is the question that toys at the front of my mind begging for an answer but I'm unable to do so. I walk along a small street crowded with species selling all kinds of horrid things. Cantinas and other  various different shops are settled in large, tall buildings that stretch all the way to the grey clouds that block out any sun.

This isn't how a Jedi is suppose to be. Cold, wet and desperate to hide away from the on coming glances from men. No, a Jedi is suppose to stand tall and not let it look like anything is effecting them. A Jedi is suppose to be brave, brave for others if not themselves.

However at this moment I don't feel like a Jedi. At this moment I feel insignificant as if the weapon hung on my hip means nothing. I feel small under the predatory gazes coming from every direction. I feel like there is a weight pressing down on my mind, pushing my shoulders downwards and threatening to collapse my knees.

I turn to my left and begin to tell a joke about how horrid this situation is to Master Nilim before stopping short.

He's not here.

He's always been here.

I need him here.

     I gather up all the lingering thoughts of my Master and curl them into a ball before tossing it out into the force. I cannot afford to let my mind linger upon memories. I must focus on the here and now, it's what a good Jedi would do. A good Jedi would find a way home.

My legs feel like lead as I drag them down the street, I know I need to stop somewhere, find a ride home possibly or just to rest my legs for a bit. I look up from where my eyes are focused on the cracks in the pavement and do a quick sweep of the street I'm currently walking down.

The street comes to a close with a vast casino. The walls seem as though they use to be white but are now enveloped in an army green moss. The walls have missing bricks and there is a flickering neon sign perched upon the front wall spelling out the ever so creative name of the casino.

Alaspin Bar.

I mean at least it tells me what planet I'm currently on. I think.

I make a quick decision that the Alaspin Bar is the best place to start looking for a ride, it's got to be full of creatures who will happily give me a ride back to Coruscant or somewhere where I can get a message to the council. The force is staying oddly quiet, I take that as a sign the force wants me to go in here and proceed to walk in.

I push open the cracked glass door just to be bombarded by noise. Laughter and jeers infiltrate my ears pressing against my ear drums making them burn.

I went to turn around but stopped myself. This seems to be the biggest place around, therefore more people to give me a ride.

I squeeze between bodies as I work my way over to the oval shaped bar in the centre. I slide myself onto an empty seat and glance around; an ortolan and neimoidan are sat drinking from half empty glasses laughing about something. Several other parties are sat in similar positions to this, hunched over bottles or drawing nearby attention with ridiculous drunken shows.