Mislead

777 49 10
                                    

[5 months later]
April 12, 2020
12:24 p.m
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Javen Khari Scott

I sat in the doctors office waiting for them to come back to tell me what I was here for

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

I sat in the doctors office waiting for them to come back to tell me what I was here for. My leg shook as my heart beat sped up. I was just nervous.

There was a small knock on the door before the doctor came in. I looked at her giving a small smile of hope. She only gave me a look of sadness which made me sigh.

"I'm sorry, you have had another miscarriage." She said and a tear rolled down my face.

"Are you serious?" She nodded.

"I am, I'm really sorry for your loss." I shook my head getting my stuff together. I walked out the room starting to leave out the hospital.

I got in my car slamming the door throwing everything into the passengers seat. I rested my head on the steering wheel starting to cry.

In the last 5 months, this makes my 4th miscarriage. Dealing with all these losses has kinda drifted me and Kentrell apart. We don't argue or anything it's just that hurt of losing a child we could've had together messes with our head. We just shut down on each other.

I actually have a few reasons for why I shut down on him. Nisha is pregnant with his second child. Now that, was a fight. I never knew how much of a hot head I was until I found that out. He didn't cheat on me though, it was a few weeks before me and him got back together. So yeah, she had a baby on the way and it's a girl. Armani.

Also, he's been using steroids. After my first miscarriage he hadn't been motivated to do anything. He has shows to do, he has 5 more one being today. He wants to be hype and have a lot of energy. I've tried to do get him to stop and he eventually did. But then there went my second miscarriage. He went behind my back and started to use those again along with different ones.

Thankfully got him to stop again then boom, third miscarriage. All he did that time was start smoking a lot more than usual. Not just blunts, cigarettes too which was a huge turn off to me. And of course I told him that, and respectfully he stopped. Now here I was with my fourth pregnancy and I've lost the baby again. Only God knows what he'll do this time.

But that's some reasons why we've been a little distant and why we shut down on each other. It's hard and frustrating, but we're trying. At least I was.

I drove away making my way home. I wasn't going to tell him because I didn't want him to shut down before his show. I wanted him to perform to the best of his ability. The baby is his motivation.

When I made it I seen everybody was here. I smiled, I was glad to be around family. It was genuine love here.

I got out my car going in the house.

"Mommy!" I smiled bending down to be embraced by a hug from Javani.

"M-....M-Move!" Ja'Khari stuttered pushing his sister to the side.

LifelineWhere stories live. Discover now