Letters to Luke » cake au [complete.]

▷ 28th of June 2014 [2] ◁

A/N: regular chapters are going to come in pairs, if that makes sense :-)

[Calum.]

I stepped back inside once Luke's car had disappeared from sight, and sighed to myself. I kicked the door shut and was going to head back to my room when I heard my mum call me.

"Yeah?" I asked, poking my head into her bedroom, where she was sitting and reading a book.

"You should have him over more often," she smiled, and I gave her a small smile.

"Yeah, maybe."

"He's nice, Calum. He's a good kid, despite that crazy hair. And the two of you seem to get along well."

I shrugged. "I guess..."

"What's wrong?" she asked kindly, closing her book and putting it to the side. "You seem upset."

"I'm not upset, really," I answered, sighing and rubbing my arm. "More like confused."

"Why?"

I shook my head, giving her a smile. "It's fine. Never mind."

She didn't seem convinced, but I left before she could question me any further. Slipping into my own bedroom, I closed the door behind me and picked up my phone that was strangely in plain sight on my desk. I didn't have my phone on me generally, since I never used it. I only had four contacts on it, anyways.

I hit the 3 key, pressing my phone to my ear. I sat down on my bed as I listened to the dial tone, drumming my fingers on my knee impatiently.

After many rings, Mali finally picked up, and I breathed out a sigh. "Finally."

"Well hello to you too Cal," she answered sarcastically, but I could hear the amusement in your voice. "What's up?"

"I need to talk to you about Luke," I sighed, falling into a laying down position on my bed.

"Alright, what about him? Oh! Was today your study date?"

"Yeah," I grumbled, closing my eyes.

"How did it go?"

"Great, I think I actually helped him understand a lot of things better. But it was terrible at the same time."

"What? Why?" she asked, sounding as confused as I felt.

"Becaaaause," I sighed. "I'm just even more confused now. I don't- I don't know what to think. He's just so attractive but at the same time he's just a friend and I don't know if that's what I want but it is what I wanted and I'm just confused."

"Calum, you're not making any sense, you know that right?"

I huffed, grumbling a little as I tried to collect my thoughts. "He's my first actual friend in ages, Mali. Right now, I have no idea what I feel for him, but I don't want to mess up my chance at actually having friends by falling for him."

"Hmm... Well why don't you wait it out and see? Maybe it's just... You know, loneliness speaking."

"Yeah..." I stared up at the posters on my ceiling, not saying anything for a moment. "But- Okay, what if I actually do like him. Then what? I'd have a crush on not just one of my friends, but my only friend. I don't know how I feel about that."

"Hang out with his friends, too," she simply suggested. "Become friends with them. Then their friends, and so on. It's not as hard as you think it is."

"I'm a socially awkward prick, Mali. You know that."

"I do, and so does Luke by now, I'm sure. Don't worry so much about that, Cal. Just- You're complaining that you don't want to fall for your only friend. So go make some more, and that way he won't be your only one!"

I groaned. "I don't even understand what's going on anymore."

She laughed, and I smiled a little at the sound. "Alright, Cal. Look, just... Just let things play out as they're supposed to. You've for time. You'll figure it out."

"Okay," I answered, slightly unconvinced. "I'll let you know how that goes."

"Don't be so cynical, Cal. Anyways, I'll talk to you later. Love you!"

"Love you too, bye Mali," I sighed, hanging up the phone and tossing it to the side, somewhere on my bed. Tucking my hands under my head, I stared up at the various bands staring back down at me and tried to make sense of my jumbled thoughts.

Maybe Mali was right. I should try to become friends with Mikey and Ash, and their other friends. I just didn't know what I was going to do about the Luke situation, though...

Finally, I just decided that "que sera, sera," and I called it a day.