The Gay Who Stabbed Me

Chapter 17 (1/29/2015)

17

"Yes..." I moaned as my eyes flutter. Ganito ba talaga ang proposal. Hindi naman ganito ang napapanood ko sa TV or sa movie o ang mga nababasa ko sa mga pocketbooks.

But... I cannot think straight. Not when he's on top of me nibbling my lip as if it was the yummiest breakfast. As if kulang ang breakfast na kinain niya kanina kaya nagpapakasawa siya ngayon sa labi ko.

"Alexis.."

"Hmmm?" I heard him say but I don't know if he's answering me or he's moaning dahil hindi niya tinitigilan ang paghalik sa leeg ko. Napapasinghap tuloy ako.

Pero teka nga! Mapapalampas ko ba ang pagkakataon? Baka mamaya pagkatapos ng lahat makalimutan na niya na nagpropose pala siya sa akin. Aba mahirap na. Mas mabuti na bago magkalimutan, magkaliwanagan muna kami.

"Are you serious?"

"As serious as hell." At ipinasok niya ang dalawang kamay niya sa shirt ko ang cupped both my breast under my bra. Napasinghap ako.

"Pero..oww." He pinched my nipples. Okay! Enough with talking. Pero kung kelan naman nakapag decide na ako na ititigil na ang pag uusap, saka naman siya tumigil sa paghalik sa leeg ko at tumingin sa akin. Pero hindi pa din niya inaalis ang kamay niya sa dibdib ko.

"Amanda, at this point, buts and doubts can't stop me, and whatever it is are no longer significant. I have never felt this determined, I have never felt this way towards any woman and I don't wanna let go of this feeling." Ay talaga naman. Talaga namang hindi mo pa naramdaman ito sa ibang babae. Bakla ka kaya dati!

"I love you Amanda." He said while looking straight in to my eyes. I can see his sincerity and his love for me and I feel like crying.

"I love you too Alexis." And when a couple exchange I love you's when they're both on top of a bed, alam na ang mangyayari.

Kaya naman nung hinalikan niya ako, I kissed him back without inhibition. Pero kelan ba ako nagkaroon ng inhibition pagdating sa kanya? Kelan ba ako nagdalawang isip? For a skeptic like me, who'd never had any boyfriend, it was so strange that I was able to trust him completely. Kahit nung unang beses na may nangyari sa amin, hindi ako kinabahan, hindi ako nagsisi. It's as if my heart knows him and had put my full trust on him eventhough I don't have any idea who he is.

Nung nalaman kong bading siya, instead na lumayo ako sa kanya, I felt this urge to prove to him and to myself na hindi siya ganun. Kasi una pa lang hindi na naniniwala ang puso ko na bakla siya. At hindi ako nagkamali.

He tugged at my shirt and I raised my arms to help him get rid of it pagkatapos itinapon na lang niya kung saan. At ayaw kong nadedehado, so I started unbuttoning his top.

Hindi ko napigilan ang sarili ko na haplusin ang dibdib niya nung mahubad ko na ang damit niya. It earned a gasp from him and his lips travelled from my neck back to my lips and he gave me a deep searing kiss before he withdraw.

Nagtaka ako nung tumigil siya sa paghalik sa akin kaya napadilat ako and I saw him intently looking at me.

"Mandy..."

"What?" Nalulunod ako sa klase ng tawag niya. It's as if his voice is touching my soul.

"Do you have any idea of your effect on me Amanda?" He said before he gently kissed me on my lips. It was so slow that I feel like he's not kissing me but my very soul. And I feel like crying. I didn't know that making love could make anyone cry.

"You drive me insane." I closed my eyes as I felt him kissed my forehead then my eyes and I whimper as I felt the sensations his hands brought into my body.