UNBROKEN

FORTY NINTH INSTALMENT

The day before our wedding day all my friends and family arrived. Right next door was a resort so many of them stayed there or they pitched a tent and stayed on the house yard.

Grant went out with the boy for his bucks night to the local pub.

I was trying on my dress and the girls were trying on theirs. We were having a glass of champagne. The weirdest thing happened, my breast were really sore and I told Mum as she was the only one I felt comfortable talking to about this. She then called in Grants mum who was a nurse. Well long story short they took me to the hospital for a blood test and a pregnancy test. This was not how I expected to spend the last night before I got married.

Alisa, Trisha, Mum, Aunties, Cousins and Ava were all there waiting for the results. We had to wait for hours. Finally the doctor arrived and he said I wasn't pregnant and that the soreness and swelling was caused due to fluid retention so nothing to worry about. We left the hospital after 1am. I was exhausted and to be honest a bit disappointed about not really having a hens night. Mum and my friends could see my disappointment but there was nothing they could do. I didn't see Grant that night or the next day.

I woke in the morning and everyone was in the kitchen cooking a big breakfast with bacon, eggs, hash browns, toast and juice. When I walked in mum told me to go back to bed and she would bring me breakfast in bed, so I promptly spun around and headed back to my room. Not long later everyone came bouncing in to the room. They were all so excited. Mum handed me my breakfast on a platter and kissed my forehead and told me she loved me.

Whilst eating my breakfast Alice and Trisha were sitting with me talking about how excited I must be and how beautiful my dress was and how much they were looking forward to it. I got an empty feeling in the pit of my stomach. I couldn't understand what this feeling was so I wasn't going to say anything. I just smiled and nodded.

After breakfast we went swimming in the pool and just lazed around until lunch time. It was now time to get ready. Grants Mum had given us her room in order to get ready. The girls had their showers and started to get dressed everyone was fussing around me.

I walked in to the shower as the beads of water hit my skin they felt like little needles even though the shower was cool I felt my body temperature rise, my face got really hot and the tears fell freely. I didn't make a sound as I didn't want people to know I was crying. What would they think? Why would I be crying on my special day? And this emptiness in the pit of my stomach would not go away. I started to have a burning in my throat it felt like it was going to close over and I was finding it hard to breath. I stayed in the shower until I heard Mum call out "Emily! You have to get out sweetheart and get ready it's not long now". "Coming I whispered over the sound of the shower running" I replied.

I got out of the shower and wrapped myself in a large white towel that wrapped around me almost twice. I remember the towel being very soft and fluffy.Mum and the girls guided me over to a chair so they could do my hair and makeup. I had my hair half up and half down. After I had my makeup done the girls got their dresses on and Mum brought me a bottle of champagne. The girls all left the room for a few minute and left Mum and I alone. "Mum, I don't want to do this" I said as the tear welled up again. "Emily you just have nerves sweet heart, you will be fine it has just been a busy few days and your probably tired also after not having much sleep" she replied. A single tear slid down my cheek. Mum realised and leaned in and gently wiped it away. "You will be fine sweet heart, if you cry you will ruin your make up. Come on get up and I'll help you get in your dress" she said trying to comfort me. I stood up and put my hand on mums shoulder as I lifted my first leg into the dress with the other following close behind. Mum pulled the dress up and I put my arms in to the sleeves. She slowly buttoned the back of the dress and when finished she lent down and grabbed the white hat I had chosen with the veil connected and placed it carefully on my head, she placed bobby pins through the hat in to my hair so it wouldn't move. Mum spun me around when she had finished, she took to steps backwards and smiled then I saw a tear roll down her cheek. "You look beautiful Emily, truly beautiful!" She said as she wiped the tear from her own cheek.

The girls entered the room just as we had finished and they squealed. "Oh my god you look beautiful" Alice said. Trisha could see that I had a concerned looked on my face as much as I tried to hide it. "You ok Emily?" She asked and as she said this I had to turn away. Mum walked over and placed a hand on my shoulder "She'll be fine girls she is just nervous". I heard the door open and I turned to see who it was there standing in front of me was my Pa.

Pa was dressed in his grey suit. My heart raced. Here was my favourite person in the world, the one who I called my protector, my hero standing in front of me. For his age he was so very handsome in his suit. His age was showing but he still looked perfect to me. I smiled a real smile for the first time that day. Seeing him I felt safe and relaxed. I knew no matter what he would be there for me. The only man that had never hurt me in any way, never let me down, pick me up when I fell, put brown stuff on me when I hurt myself and held me when I cried. Pa had little hair on the top of his head actually he had 3 hairs only on top. I knew he had had his hair cut especially for today and I know he would have said to the hair dresser "short back and sides and don't take to much off the top" or "I'll have to give you a finders fee for the hair on top" as he always had. Pa looked at Mum and the girls and said "it's nearly time you had better get out there" they all gave me a final hug and made their way out.

I stood staring at my Pa with a slight smile on my face. "What's wrong Emily" he said as he walked closer. "I don't want to do this Pa" I replied. "Well then.. You don't have too. If you don't want too" he said softly then he reached out and held me. "But everyone has come for far Pa, so much money had been spent, how am I to get out of this?" I said. "Emily, we are all here for you! If you don't want to do this and really truly don't think it's right I will walk out there with you and we can tell them all together, it's not a problem as long as you are happy with your decision" he said looking me in the eyes. I knew he meant it, he would have done anything for me (all of our family). Pa had a way of making you feel like you were the only person in the world even in a room full of people. We stood there for some time when I heard the music playing. It was the start of the song Unchained melody that had been chosen for me to walk down the isle too. "I'm ready Pa, Mum was right in probably just nervous".

We walked out arm in arm to the veranda and then to the base of the limestone stairs leading up to the top garden. As we walked I stopped and looked at Pa "you are my hero Pa, I truly love you" I said then he kissed my fore head through my veil. Pa didn't respond but I saw his eyes swell but no tears. I needed to say that to him at that exact time. We got to the top of the stairs and there in front of my was Grant. I wanted to turn and run, run as fast as I. Oils but I then looked to the left and saw all of my family and friends. There was no turning back now.

We reached Grant and the minister asked who was giving this woman away "I do" said my Pa ever so proudly. He then leaned down and whispered in my ear "I will never give you away, he can marry you though" I looked at him and smiled. Another reason I loved this man so very much. Pa gave my hand to Grant "you look after her" he said. The rest of the vowels I don't really remember. I just remember a great feast and drinks (I didn't have too many) then the waltz. As we waltzed Grant told me loved me but I couldn't say the words. I just smiled. I saw my Pa across the veranda then he walked towards Grant. "Can I have this dance" he said and Grant agreed. Pa waltzed with me. He made me feel like a princess by spinning me around. I had the feeling that I was that little girl again that he use to sit on his lap and burn with a spoon (you had to read all my instalments to know the meaning of this). That was the best dance I had ever had.

I danced with all my uncles then as the night went on I danced with my friends and cousins. Speeches where done by my uncles and Granta side. Funny ones and lovely ones.

We were suppose to have a room at the resort for our wedding night but they had double booked it so we had to stay in a caravan....