Our best mistake // Shawn Mendes Fanfiction

Part 2, chapter 25

POV : Shawn

It's been nearly a week now that Madison kicked me out, and I am turning in circles in my flat like a caged lion... getting crazy! Is she ever going to forgive me? Will she ever listen to the truth? The more time I spend alone, the more I feel guilty. I feel bad for what happened, but if only she knew I did not cheat on her! I want to hold her tight, tell her I'm sorry and that I love her! I should be by her side, taking care of her, of the baby! Days go by and we are getting closer to the term and our family looks like nothing but a family! Now it's Connor who's taking care of my fiancé and he told me I should leave her alone, give her time. Always time. How much more time does she need? He said she'll come to my flat by the end of the week, but it's Saturday night and she still hasn't come, and I am starting to believe that she lied to him. She won't come... I lost her forever, did I? I lost her, and my baby... 

I take a look at the bag she had packed for me. She put clothes inside, some boxes of cookies she had baked, my notebook in which I wrote my ideas for my album, but she also put my favorite sweater of hers, and a tiny pink baby PJs... pink for a girl... She really cares... 

As distress fills my heart once more, I just let myself sink in the couch. I open my phone, to see Maddi's beautiful picture, and put on music. Her favorite song, Memories... and the lyrics now sound so clear to me... 

« When I wake up to your footsteps

As you get up out of bed,

They make a song that sounds so simple

But it dances in my head...

...

And the thought of us forever, is one that won't ever go away...

All I need to know is where to start,

Take my hand and show me forever so I

Never will I ever let you go...

...

All these precious moments that we carved in stone, are only memories after all...

You gave me hope, but I've got to let go...

It's taking it's toll, deep in my soul,

Now I've got to let go...

We wrote our story, and we sang our song,

We hung our pictures on the wall,

Now those precious moments that we carved in stone, are only memories after all... »

Are these only memories? Is our story really finished? Never an old song I wrote hit my soul so deep...

I really do hope we figure things out before the baby comes, I don't want to ruin this moment... And I want Madison back... I just can't live like this. I can't live without her! I had planned my whole life with her, now I'm all alone...

I get up and walk out on my balcony to stare at the city. I look at the cars, the people walking down the streets. They are coming home from work, students on their way to parties, dads on their way to see their children, girls on their way to a first date... people with beautiful exciting stories... and then there's me. I'm on my balcony, I have all the money to be happy, yet I am not... All my life, I wrote music about love, and I'm not capable of making it last... 

Across the city, behind the buildings, Maddi is there, in our house, probably watching a movie with Connor, laughing, smiling... and I'm here, brokenhearted... does she know the pain I feel, from being far from her and from my baby?

I pick up my phone and dial her number. Oh Maddi please answer this time. I need to hear your voice...

I wait for a ring, two, three...

Then the ringing stops,

And I end up on her voicemail.