Every Rose Has It's Thorn

Chapter 20

I yawned awake and my phone was off. I guess it died last night. Due to my complete lack to look like good in the morning, I flopped out of bed and went into the bathroom. I had to plug my phone in to listen to Black Veil Brides! That's just a habit to do so. I hopped into the shower and let my stress fall down the drain. I looked at the razor blade as it mocked me. Then I returned my focus back on the water but then I looked at my scars. My whole shitty past on my body. My arms for Andy, my thighs for chase, my stomach for my dad. Its all right there. I just wanted to curl up and cry so that's what I did. I laid down in the tub and turned the shower off so I could turn the faucet on. Maybe all I need is a bubble bath, just to sooth myself. I poured soap in and sat in the bubbles just staring at the razors. Oh how badly I wanted to seep it into my skin, just see the blood cover my arms. No! I can't! I began crying and my phone went off. Andy was skyping me. Yes! This is just what I need!

"Hey babe." He smiled as I answered the call.

"I'm freaking out right now Andy!"

"Why! What's wrong?"

"I just wanna cut! I can't but I want to so bad!"

"Calm down! Everything will be alright baby!"

"I know!"

"Pick up the razor and hide it under a towel." He said calmly

"Okay." I did as so but I wanted to rip it out and just start again!

"Why do you even want to cut?"

"Its like an addiction. Like cigarettes. I've cut myself too much and I know what pleasure I get from it."

"Shhhhh. Its okay. Breathe." His voice was reassuring. I did as he said and relaxed.

"Are you okay?"

"Yea.."

"You know I can always come home early?"

"No. You can't. That's mean to your mom."

"She would understand."

"Andy just stop.."

"Okay." He rolled his eyes. I sank into the water slowly just to relax more tension in my body. I took deep breaths just realizing what just happened. Why do I always do this shit?! I get so freaked out by my past that I want to c- nope I'm not going to think of that now.

"I'll Skype you later babe."

"Wait why?" He wined then shoved his face into the pillow.

"I need to get dressed." He immediately lifted his head up a bit and raised one eyebrow.

"Can I watch?" I rolled my eyes and stood up from the water and drained it. How am I going to do this? I wrapped myself in a towel and tucked it in so my towel would stay on. Then I dried my hands off, grabbed my phone, and went into my bedroom.

"Last time you watched me dress you half way died." I laughed

"I can keep control." He smiled. I opened my towel a little bit. He bit his lip and I began laughing.

"Exactly." I scolded

"I just miss you." He said with such passion.

"I miss you too." I smiled then threw a towel over the camera.

"Hey!" Andy wined and I got in a plain black bra and a loose pink belly shirt. Then I put on a sexy pair of black underwear. I did it so fast I thought I was a magician. I uncovered it and Andy's face lit up.

"Tada! See its like a magic trick!" I smirked

"Oh! Fascinating! Can you make you're clothes disappear."