Zayn PoV

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"Zayniiiieee." I hear Laiylah call my name. I turn around, annoyed.
"Hi Lay." I say through my teeth.
"I miss you!" She squeals. Her high voice getting to me. It's like she pretends to be with me.
"Me too." I force my smile.
"Where you going?" She says smiling.
"I wanted to do some recording sesh by myself." I say honestly.
"I want to come." She whines.
"Laiy, I have to focus." I say pulling her off me.
"Zaynnnie-Poo? Are you okay?" She says pouting.
I look at her, and she pouts. I did once love her, but I don't anymore. Don't get me wrong, she's beautiful. But, it's like she acts to be with me. Just because of my money. I don't know. Maybe it's me. Oh God. Please forgive me for this.
"Laiylah, I'm sorry. But I don't think we are working out. I'm getting to busy, I can't even focus on you right now." I say looking at her.
"You're breaking up with me?" She says in disbelief.
"Yes." I sigh.
"Forget you then." She yells and slaps me. I grab my face, and look at her.
"I didn't even love you!" She says before walking off. I shake it off, and walk into the studio room.
"Hey Z-Dawg. You in for recording? You're not scheduled for today." The producer says.
"Egh, I don't mind. Not doing anything anyways." I say.
"Alright, any particular song your thinking of singing?" He says.
"How about You and I?" I say grabbing my headphones.
"Alright. In 5-4-3-2.." He says.
He gives me the go sign.
I start singing, and I get lost into the music. I think of her, her face comes into mine. I picture her sitting there. And I'm singing to her. Call me crazy, but I think I like this girl. I know we don't know anything about eachother, but her diary is giving me an insight.
I sing the last part, and I look at my producer. He gives me the thumbs up.
"Hold up Zayn. My wife is here." He says getting up. I nod my head, and shift my glasses a bit. I sit on the couch, and open a water. I let the cool water soothe my throat. I check my phone. I get over a hundred DMs. I scan through them quickly. One catches my eye. It was that girl, I click on her name.
I read her message. I play with my thumbs on what to respond.
"Hey, journal? I never received it. I press send. I close my phone, and down the water that was in the bottle. I know it was a lie, but I want to read more about her. I close my phone, and I hear Louis walk in.
"What's up Z-Dawg!" He says grabbing a water.
"Nothing thinking of that girl again." I say.
"Ahh, well did you decide on what to you want to do?"
"Maybe keep it, read it. Then send it back." I say. He gives me a thumbs up then he walks out. I grab the journal out. I open the next page.
"Dear Journal,
Today was so not fun. I hated it so much. I couldn't handle today so I decided to cut again. I'm beginning to have no room to cut, I just keep opening up new scars. Dad called today, he asked how I was doing. He sent me 200$ to make up for leaving. It's just sitting in my drawer. I can't open it nor use it. Mom is slowly stopping drinking. Last night she came into my room drunk, she hit me once. Said it was my fault. My brothers are just always at basketball games or basketball practice. I wish I was popular like them. I had to cut a peice of my hair today because some girl threw gum in my hair. When will god finally look down on me and say this girl has had enough trouble? When? I seriously am thinking of killing myself. No one wouldn't care for me anyways. My family would be happy about it. Wouldn't they? Mom just came home, she's singing downstairs. She's opening another beer, and I can hear her. I closed my door to keep her away. I'm afraid of her now. Well I have homework to start on anyways. Bye."
I close the book, and I lean against the wall. I have to find this girl.

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