Descent

July 5th, 2018

I'm one year older and so is Mattie.

We spent his birthday in Brazil but the four came back up to North America on the 3rd. South gave me early birthdays presents though. 

I really thought the states, cities, and territories would be mad at me for being so distant. But when we got here on Tuesday and I apologized for my behavior and well..... they started crying. 

Like, all of them. Even the really tough ones like Jersey and the New Yorks and New Hampshire. All of them.

Apparently it was tears of relief.  They thought they had a part to play in me acting the way I was..... Even the younger ones.

It hurt. It still hurts to think about how badly I hurt everyone. I can't believe....... I just hope I don't mess everything up...

Like I always do. 

We went out for fireworks. It's moments like these I can't believe how far I got. After the Revolution I was so broke. And here I am now.

If only Dad and Mama were here to see me now. With all the trouble I caused in the world... I hope I made them proud.

Portugal called to wish me happy birthday. He even told me he was proud.... Why? Shouldn't he be telling that to Brazil?

The Nordics called too, apparently, they sent gifts for Mattie and I. Those will be here early tomorrow.  Even Belgium and Philippines called.

Monaco, India, Aussy, and even some of my African siblings and a few others siblings called. They all said they sent cards or gifts for us. Weird, have they all always cared?

Iggy called too..... He was drunk...... and.... he said I was still too young to be the superpower and that I had a large ego and said a lot of other things... At least I know for sure he hates me.

I don't understand what I did wrong to him.... I know I left.... but it's not like I could've stayed.. Mattie and Portugal told me not to think about him though... So I guess I won't.

But it still hurts. Idk maybe something is wrong with me and everyone who likes me is pretending everything's fine.

No... no... Mattie and Ecaudor told me not to let my thoughts get there.. I have to go.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Alfred quickly closed his dairy and rushed out of his room. He was taking deep breaths like his family always told him to do when he felt like he couldn't breath. The thoughts were getting to him.

Happy thoughts. Think happy thoughts.

He suddenly crashed into someone but felt the person catch him before he hit the ground, "Al? You okay?"

He opened his eyes, "Mattie? I- I," He started to whimper, "I- my thou-"

Canada nodded, he understood and wrapped his arms around his little brother, "Breath," He said softly, "Just breath," He rubbed Alfred's back.

America held onto his brother tightly. He felt scared, he hated those thoughts. But his grip slowly started to loosen as he calmed down more and more. 

Canada held onto him and they stayed like that for awhile until he spoke, "Alfie. How about we take a walk?" It would bring him some peace, take away the thoughts, and calm him down even more, "And than when we come back, we can have a movie marathon until we wake up tomorrow morning. Okay?"

Alfred thought about it, "Okay," He muttered into his brother's chest.

Canada nodded and kissed his forehead. He grabbed America's hand and they walked to the front door, "Guys, we're going for a walk!!" He called out.

"I'm coming!!!" They heard their siblings yell as they ran to the front. 

Most of the American and Canadian territories, states/provinces, and cities ran over. The Mexicos and Mexican siblings had left earlier. They all headed out. 

Once they got back, everyone piled in the living room to watch movies, eat popcorn, and drink soda and whatever other drinks they had before everyone fell asleep at like 1am.

And you know what?

The thoughts didn't have the time to get to Alfred since he was always laughing or smiling at something his siblings did.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I'm gonna be in a program starting next week for like 3 weeks. But I'll try to update.

Especially since there are people planning England's death and I wanna see if they succeed. XD