Love, Lies, Secrets and Manipulation (Divergent/Eric OC)

62. Big Decision

"Congratulations," says Des, setting down the second white stick on the tray in front of me. "This test is positive, too. Looks like you're pregnant after all."

Oh, God. No. This is bad.

Mentally freaking out, I squeeze the edge of the infirmary bed I'm sitting on. "A-are you sure? I mean, these were just sticks that I peed on. Isn't there another test you can give me to be one hundred percent positive? These— These might just be false positive."

Des gives me a questioning look, probably because she knows that's very unlikely. "Well... sure. I can give you a blood test, but—"

"Great," I quickly respond. "Let's do that. Take however much blood you need from me. Let's do it now, 'cause I'm not walking out of here until I know for sure."

"Wait. Natalie, this isn't like a urine test. I don't have the full equipment here for that. If I do a pregnancy blood test on you, I have to send the blood samples out to the medical labs at Erudite. They're the ones who do it. And I don't get the results back right away."

"Well, how long is it gonna take?" Hopefully not more than a couple of hours.

"Usually I don't get the results back till the next day."

What?! Oh, no, that's not going to work for me!

"But... I can put a rush on the lab order," she adds, noticing my reaction. "I should have the results back by later this evening."

"Yes, please do that," I beg. I have to know as soon as possible. Eric is going to want answers. There are probably a million things running through his mind right now as he sits outside the exam room waiting for me.

"Okay, yeah," Des replies. "Um, let me just go get a syringe, then I'll come back and start drawing some blood. I'll take the samples over to Erudite myself after we're done here."

"Wait," I say, stopping her from leaving the room right away. I make sure to keep my voice low. "Des, you can't tell Eric."

She looks at me slightly confused.

"I'm serious," I say. "I don't want him knowing anything. Not yet. Not until I know for sure. And even then..."

"Natalie, the guy looked pretty worried when he brought you in here. You can't just not tell him what's going on. I'm sure he'll want to know."

"You don't get it," I say to her. "Des, I can't be pregnant. Not now."

This isn't the time for me to be pregnant with a child, responsible for bringing a life into this messed up world. I can barely keep myself safe. How am I supposed to protect a child—a baby?

"Natalie," Des says in a soft, comforting voice. She pulls the only chair that's in the room closer to the side of the bed, and she sits down, reaching for my hand. "Sweetie, it's gonna be okay. You're not alone in this. Eric loves you. I've never seen him treat anyone the way he treats you. He'll be okay with this. And even if he has trouble accepting it in the beginning, he'll learn to love this baby more than he thought possible. All dad's eventually do."

"No, I'm not worried about him," I confess. Eric may not be thrilled about the news to the point where he's jumping up and down, but he's mentioned the possibility of having a family with me someday. I know he would eventually be fine with it.

"Then, what are you worried about?"

So many things. Too many things. But I couldn't possibly begin to explain everything to Des. I don't think I'm allowed to share the news I learned this morning with anybody.