Masquerade (Liam Payne)

Chapter 15 ~ Liam

Chapter 15 ~ Liam

Leanne was right, trying to get some information out of Tammy’s lips about her past is almost impossible. I wonder what happened? Why has she buried that so deep in the darkness of her mind that she doesn’t even want to talk about? I agree that we live in the present and we should care about what already happened, but ignoring the past is not the right thing to do. It happened, we can’t change it but we can’t just ignore it. Unless you want to forget because that past hurts you too much and I’m afraid that’s what happened to her. And that’s why I don’t push. I’ve learnt that people open up when they feel comfortable and they trust and I know Tammy doesn’t trust me. In all honestly, I don’t know if she trust anyone at all, but I can wait. At least, I can get to know this Tammy, the person who she is now and maybe that will help me to understand better what happened before when she decides to tell me. Until then, I can be patient.

And then I hear her talking about charity, about helping others and she confuses me. Why someone who tries so hard to show everyone that she doesn’t care, that she is an awful person, cares so much about people she doesn’t actually know? I am indeed ashamed that we don’t help as much as we could. She is right, we have so much power but we’re always just working, making more money and by today we have so much I don’t think we will have the time to spend it, but other people don’t have a quid.

I remember my dad used to say that you would always have time if that were what you really wanted. Saying that you don’t is just an excuse because you just don’t want to try. And I know I feel more ashamed because that’s true, if we really had wanted to help, we would have found a way by now. It doesn’t have to be something big, people don’t need to know we are helping. But we don’t really try as hard as we could and that Tammy, who shows everyone she is a bad person, does this and points out how little we do… then that means something.

I want to tell her she is amazing for caring so much for people she doesn’t know, for not forgetting about those who need all the help they can get. But I know that if I compliment her in the slightest, she will react badly and I don’t want to ruin this date. It was hard enough to get her to accept, I don’t need to push her buttons. But I’m happy to see that she is not bad, she is not awful; she just acts like that although I still don’t know why.

“Why are you smiling like that?” She demands, frowning at me as she takes another sip of her tea.

“I’m just smiling, there’s nothing wrong with that,” I answer trying to fight the smile, but I can’t.

“Can you not?” I chuckle at her words but she is dead serious, which makes me laugh harder. “Stop it, Noob. Seriously, it’s not okay to be this weird.”

“You’re really a hard work, aren’t you?” I say offhandedly and her eyes narrow even more.

“I would say impossible, so you better give up now, Noob.”

I know this is dangerous, that I should keep my distance for now but you know what? I like her. I know it makes no sense, that Tammy and I are two opposites that should never get together, that she is bad for my image, that no one would approve of this… but I like her. Really like her. She is different, she intrigues me, she confuses me, she is exciting, she is complex, she makes me try harder to be the best I can do. And she makes me fight. I guess we all like a hard-to-get sometimes and I couldn’t have found a more hard to get than Tammy. I like her, with her quirky style, with her bad manners, with her rude answers, with her dark and offensive sense of humour and her arrogance. I like this different and unique girl who hides so many things from everyone. And I really want to be the one that gets to see those parts, to be the only one who really knows her. That makes everything more special, don’t you think?