Abnormal Little Me (Completed)

Chapter 71: All Actions Have Consequences

Hey guys! The story has now more than 100 000 words... I think I might need help. How did I even get to that? I can't stop having ideas and keep putting them in. I hope that you don't mind and that you still like it even though the end seems further and further away every time I write another chapter. Anyway, have fun reading this chapter! Don't forget to vote and comment :) Love you all <3

"What is she doing on your lap?" growled a voice.
"Lower your volume. You're going to wake her," responded an other.
"Give her to me."
"No. She's confused, scared and sad because of how you reacted. Calm down, Ri. For her. She is going to be terrified if you are this angry when she wakes up."
"It's not like I can easily control my emotions when I'm around her. Jinary is not pleased to see her on you and neither am I."
"You and your wolf know very well that I don't see her that way. She's more like a little sister to me, someone I have to protect at all cost, even if it's against her own soul-mate."
"I will never hurt her."
"Not on purpose, but you don't know what goes on in her head. She's not like the werewolves we're used to. If she's strong on certain aspects, she is extremely fragile on others. That includes you. You're the first one who she's profoundly attached to and that scares her immensely. She's scared to do something wrong and that you'll reject her for it, but mostly, she's afraid of losing you. Having your entire happiness depending on a single individual can be difficult to accept for someone who has spent her life being the only one she could count on. Let her walk at her own pace. She'll be by your side eventually."
"She's not scared of losing me."
"Are you an idiot? What was the first thing she did when she learned that you were hurting yourself in that forest?"
"She came and made me stop."
"And this, despite the fact that she was still terrified of you. What did she said when she thought Mikyan was in your room?"
"I don't want him to hurt you."
"Exactly. Even with her biggest nightmare near her, the one who tormented and broke her, all she thought about was your safety. She didn't have the same life as we did, Ri, but she's still a werewolf. Her first instinct will always be to protect you. You were prepared for these kinds of instincts to kick in and you were ready to love her through everything, but she didn't have that education. I went through Cyrian's library. There were no books about you or about soul-mates. He knew she was yours and prevented her from ever finding out."
"That bastard. No wonder she didn't know anything about soul-mates. I feel so stupid for not understanding sooner. I feel stupid for not asking her. I'm a terrible soul-mate, aren't I?"
"It's a learning process for the both of you. It can't be helped that you were taught that you'd find her at the beginning of her life. Nobody could have predicted that you'd have to wait over a thousand years to be with her. Nobody could have predicted that she would already be an adult and that she would have been through so much already. If you had found her when she was born, you wouldn't have needed to ask about her past; you would already know it. Maybe there is some things she is afraid to talk to you about. Things she's ashamed to share. Things she thinks could lead you to love her less."
"Where are you picking up ideas like that, sweetheart? There is no way I could love you less. You are my whole life and I've never been happier."
I felt something warm on my cheek. I leaned into it, seeking comfort in this heat. The warmth moved away. I whined and clung to it. My eyes fluttered open and my gaze connected immediately with two deep brown irises. Rilos? I threw myself in his arms, inhaling his scent. Rain. It was him. This whole exchange hadn't been a dream. Why did Vriany know me so well? We talk but not enough so he would know my deepest secrets.
"I know everyone's thoughts, Lyra. Past and present. Sometimes future, but only when I'm concentrating really hard."
"That must be tiring."
"You get used to it. Some people mute the thoughts when I'm around them. My husband and Rilos are two of them."
"Is Balio aware that you're using him?" I asked, smiling.
"No, so you better keep it to yourself. I'm just kidding. When we met for the first time, I was having terrible migraines because of it. We were walking down a hall and, as the distance between us shrank, my headaches diminished. It must have been visible on my face because he smiled and said to me: "Looks like you could use my company. Want to grab a coffee or something?" We've never parted ever since. Now, we're not here to talk about my incredibly sweet and adorable love-life. Rilos has some things he needs to discuss with you."
I turned my head to the one concerned and realized that he had fallen on the floor with me when I had jumped at him.
"Do you want to get off, Lyra?"
"No." I replied firmly. "What happened back at your office?"
"Elanazie lost control of her power. I thought you were unaffected until you started chewing on my shoulder. You made me unable to think about anything else and I couldn't allow that because Elanazie would have gone and torn Cerc apart. I needed to calm her down and absorb her power and I couldn't do it because I was completely focused on you. That's why I tried to get you to stop. Not because I didn't want it to happen."
"You said that I wasn't in my right mind. Did it have something to do with her powers?"
"It had everything to do with it. She amplifies all of your emotions, desires and fears. I didn't want you to do something you weren't consciously ready for. If she hadn't been there, I would have let you do it."
"I'll remember that."
I paused, recalling the last words Vriany had said to Rilos.
"Vriany was right. There is at least one thing I haven't shared with you about my past. Do you swear that you won't hate me for it or that it won't affect how you see me?"
"Did you kill someone, sweetheart?"
"I wasn't allowed to or we wouldn't be in this situation because Dark-Soul and Sadist would be very dead."
"Then let me reiterate what I have told you before. Nothing you have done will make me love you less."
"When I was around ten years old, the other kids stopped being scared of me and discovered that I couldn't hurt them. They started by insulting me, but it soon got physical. I was shoved into walls, scratched, punched and pushed down the stairs. They would hold my head under water until I passed out. I never retaliated because Dark-Soul had told me that he would know and would act upon it. No one would treat my injuries because they thought that he would go after them too. I would stay in my room until I was healed. I was poisoned and it was worse than any broken bones. I would be on the floor, shivering and throwing up and would eventually black out from the lack of oxygen. I would wake up, sometimes days later, in the same position. No one had even cared to check if I was okay. I never knew whether it was an adult or a kid who was poisoning me, but after the fourth time, I had had enough. I jumped off the highest tower of the castle onto swords I had placed on the ground. The only reason it didn't work was because the necklace moved the sword that was supposed to chop off my neck. My heart was pierced by the other one and most of my bones were crushed by the fall, but I didn't die. Dark-Soul was so pissed that he waited for me to heal myself only to "re-educate" me afterwards. I thought that if I couldn't kill myself, maybe I could get someone to do it for me. I trained until I became the strongest fighter in the castle and humiliated the chief of guards in front of his men. He did not take it well and swung at my neck. I didn't make a move to stop him, but his sword broke in pieces before it touched my skin. Dark-Soul came but didn't get mad at me. He lashed out at the chief of guard and his men and declared that they could hurt me all they wanted but that killing and raping me was off limits. I thought that he was being nice, but in the end, he just wanted to make sure that the babies I had would be his son's."
I looked up and saw exactly what I was expecting: anger, resentment and sadness.
"I'm sorry, Rilos. I know that you should try to take your own life when you have a soul-mate but I just couldn't take it anymore. I was hurting so bad and I couldn't see the good in anything," I said with a small voice.
I tried to dislodged myself from his arms to give him time to think about what I had told him. By trying to kill myself, I had basically tried to kill him. It's not like I didn't know that I had a soul-mate. I did know and willingly attempted to commit suicide. His embrace tightened around me, preventing me from leaving his lap.
"I know I've upset you. You can let me go."
"Yes, you've upset me. In fact, I am extremely angry, but not at you. Stars, who would be upset at someone who didn't see the end of their nightmare and tried to end it themselves? I'm mad at those who led you to feel this way. I'm mad that no one except you suffered consequences for what was happening. No wonder you wanted to know if it was possible to breathe under water. You didn't want to be put in that situation again."
I nodded. Rain drops were falling on my shoulder. I could hear, not only Rilos, but also Vriany sniffling. I gently rubbed Rilos' back.
"Don't be sad, Elun. The whole pack is going to cry without reason and they'll be so confused."
"I don't care. Right now, you're the only one that's important. Let me shed the tears you've never allowed yourself to spill for this."