Fallen Darkness (Yatori fanfic)

Chapter 19

Yato's words completely changed my way of thinking. They had given me something important. A reason to stay, and live for.

A few days later I was out of the hospital, and I was heading home at 6 in the morning. I was thinking that mom had no idea about anything that happened. She had only gotten a phone call and she couldn't come to the hospital because her doctor wouldn't let her, but when she said the previous day that she would come I told her I would soon return home so she didn't have to.

I entered the house and closed the door behind me. Looking around, the house was so untidy -it was just like I left it. It was so dark, so quiet. I walked towards the living room and I saw the blood stains on the couch and on the floor, making me feel terrible in the thought that mom had seen all this.

"Mom?" I shouted, and my voice broke the silence. I knew she was here, but I didn't know where. Probably in her bedroom sleeping. I headed to the kitchen, where I left the things I was carrying, when I heard fast footsteps on the stairs. I turned around to look. Mom ran downstairs in spite of her limping and she stopped for a moment a few meters away, looking at me with tears in her eyes, before she walked towards me and hugged me tightly. I hugged her back.

"I'm so glad you're okay", she cried on my shoulder. I kept hugging her and ran my fingers through her hair, trying not to cry myself.

"I'm okay mom..I'm sorry I got you worried." We let go and she held both of my hands, while looking at me from head to toe with a sad look on her face.

"You look so weak and so pale..are you alright? What did the doctors tell you? Is there anything you need? Anything you want me to get you?"

"No mom, I'm okay, I just..lost a lot of blood that I still haven't regained. I'll be fine, just need to rest, that's all." I couldn't stand to see her like that, even though I was smiling at her the whole time. I wiped her tears from her cheeks and looked deep inside her eyes.

"I promise it won't happen again", I whispered. She looked at me in such a worried way, but I could also see the happiness coming from her smile . She had already lost her husband, but now she knew she wouldn't lose me. And that thought alone made her happy.

"I'll be in my room if you need me", I told her and went upstairs. With every step, I could see my blood stains, finally leading to the bathroom. I decided to ignore it for now and clean it later, and I headed to my room.

It looked like there had been an explosion. Clothes all over, books and papers on the floor. I hadn't tidied it up since dad passed away. I let out a sigh and started cleaning. It took me quite a while, but I put everything back in place and the room looked normal again, however there were two final things left: the dirty clothes that I had to take to the bathroom, and my blades which I found on the floor and in my drawer.

Just when I was starting to get very worried about what to do, I heard a sound coming from the window. I turned around to see Yato trying to open it. I started laughing, put the blade I was holding down and went to help him.

"Hey, how did it go?" he said when I let him in and he got comfortable on my bed.

"Fine. She was very worried, but I calmed her down", I replied with a shaky voice.

"What's wrong?" I wasn't surprised he realized something was out of the ordinary.

"I just..have a couple of things left to do." I looked over at my desk where I had left the blades and the dirty clothes next to it.

"You know what to do with them, don't you?" He got up and looked at me like he was trying to send me a hundred messages with his eyes, but I immediately understood what he wanted me to do.

"I know." I got up and moved towards my desk, Yato followed. I picked up the blades I had left. I stared at them for a little while, but I took the courage and put them in a plastic bag which I sealed with a tight knot. I walked towards my trash can, and threw it in there. After that, I felt a huge weight getting off of my shoulders, as I sighed in relief. I turned to look at Yato, only to find he was smiling at me so warmly and happily. I smiled back.

"Thank you. I wouldn't have been able to do anything I've done up to here without you. I know I broke my promise, more than twice, and I'm truly sorry. But I am about to make it up to you. I promise, for real this time; I will never cut or try to kill myself again. Ever. If I do, feel free to slap me or anything you want to", I finished, with a serious look on my face, as I watched Yato laughing and walking towards me.

"I'm not planning to slap you", he laughed again. "You have come this far. I'm so proud of you." His warm smile lightened up his face, while his eyes were looking at me in such delight. I smiled back, as he leaned forward and kissed my lips gently.

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