Chapter 28

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Dean stares at me for a few moments with an intense glare plastered on. I know that he knows I read them, why else would they be on my bed...
The only sound in the room comes from the air vent underneath the window of the hotel room, and Dean chewing on a fresh piece of mint gum. If anything, it makes him more intimidating, with his lips pressed in a straight line.
"Dean" I calmly say to try and keep him relaxed. I know it takes a whole lot to get Dean mad, but I think he's still riding the adrenaline high from earlier with John, and he could very well be ready to snap right now.
"These were in my suitcase when I left, why are they on your bed now?" He asks. This calmness to him is freaking me out. He's got me cornered between him and the wall beside the bathroom door, and I feel slightly threatened. I know Dean would never hit me physically, but I wish he wouldn't stand so close.
"Can we not talk about this right now" I say nonchalantly, and scoot past him over to the bed area.
"Riley, you can't just treat this like its nothing. This is twice now you've gone through my stuff" he exclaims, not loudly but with anger laced through his voice. I appreciate the fact that he is actually trying to stay calm and listen to what I have to say instead of making assumptions and jumping to conclusions.
"Dean, I'm sorry. I just... I don't know it was sitting there and I couldn't help myself" I defend my actions. He sighs, and lazily rubs a hand through his messy hair.
I really wish I hadn't gone through the letters. They were so personal to him, and private. They were beautifully written though, and I can't help but wonder if Dean will always be stuck on Renee and unable to give me his full attention.
"That's not an excuse. You leave your phone around me all the time, that doesn't give me an open invitation to go through it now does it? It doesn't mean I get to go through the phone and be a sneaky little weasel like you've been. I can't keep anything in the open now without you investigating it! Fuck!" Dean yells, and I can feel my skin boiling. And there it is. Dean snapped.
I'm kind of sick of him yelling at me so much, I'm not a child. I know it was my fault, but what's done is done. Let's move on for gods sake. Besides, if he didn't hide so much from me, I wouldn't have to snoop.
"Well everyone else seems to know way more about you than I do! Why do I have to go through your stuff just to learn more about you? I didn't know about your dad. But John did, John out of all people did!" I scream at him. I guess this is just emotion from the past months built up and spilling out, my true feelings. Yeah, I wish Dean told me about his dad, or about any big thing in his life. I wish I got to be included in the people who knew the real Dean. Sure, I know Dean, I know him pretty well. But it kind of hurts that I told Dean about my family and my moms drug abuse, and he didn't tell me about his. It makes me feel like I trust him more than he does me.
"Holy shit, we've known each other for what? 2 months, at most? How the hell am I supposed to tell you my whole life story in that time?" Dean rolls his eyes and paces the floor. I don't know if it's my imagination, but as soon as he yells that, thunder sounds outside, and I know we're in for a storm, inside the room and outside.
"God, no wonder your mom-" Dean begins, but shuts his mouth instantly.
I stare at him and wait for him to finish with my arms crossed, but I know he won't. He was going to throw my mom leaving in my face, just like he got so mad at John for doing.
He stares back at me, and I can see the anger draining from his face, as his skin goes pale and regret, almost sadness replaces it. His eyes are wide, and he pushes his hair off of his forehead.
"You're a really sick person Dean. Like really disgusting." I spit at him.
"You got so mad at John for saying that shit about your family, then do the exact same thing to me!" I angrily spit the words at him. I'm so angry right now that I know if I don't leave, I'll end up saying something I regret. I've never gotten this mad this quickly, but Dean has taken it too far.
I walk over to the closet near the front door of the hotel room and pull my jacket off the hanger.
"Riley, please don't leave" Dean begs from across the room. I can't stay in this room, it's overwhelming and I can feel angry tears welling up in my eyes as I remember the day that my mom left. This is too much to handle, and I can feel myself reaching the breaking point.
This has got to be the tenth time I've cried tonight, and I hate making myself look weak. I open the door, before giving it a reassuring slam behind me.
"Shit!!" I hear Dean exclaim from behind the door, before a crashing sound. It's almost enough to pull me back inside to check on him and hold him until we both calm down, but I can't be with him right now.
I stuff my hands in my coat pockets before heading towards the elevator and away from Dean.

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