Kendall Schmidt Short Stories

#30 Girl Crush

'Tis a good song
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YN ran her fingers through her messy hair and looked around the floor, which was covered with clothes. Sighing to herself she bent down and gathered everything in the laundry basket and headed her way down. It was that time of the week again; her least favourite time of the week. She placed the basket down and began tossing the clothes into the washing machine, until her eyes caught a glimpse of a mark which made her stomach drop. YN cautiously picked up her husband's white shirt, which now had a bright red lipstick stain on the collar. It hadn't stopped.

Feeling sick to her stomach, she dropped the article of clothing and slammed the machine shut, causing herself to jump up at the sudden change of mood. She heard a small laugh, and felt two strong arms pulling her in.

"Easy there." Kendall mumbled against her ear, placing soft kisses along her jaw.

She couldn't help but enjoy the little attention she was getting from him. "Hi." She breathed out, half disappointed.

"Hey." Kendall breathed against her neck. "I missed you, today." He might've meant it, but to YN it didn't sound anything like a sincere statement.

"Hmm." She broke away from his embrace and picked up the now empty laundry basket.

"Honey.." Kendall's voice sounded soft and calming, creating the slightest of tears in YN's eyes. "What's wrong?" His long, lean arms brought her back into his embrace. "You okay?"

"You're doing it again." Her voice was barely audible, but she couldn't hold her words back in any longer. "You're seeing her."

Kendall's face flashed fear, he couldn't let her know. He couldn't hurt her again. "W-what..."

"Her lipstick stains are all over your collar... I thought you let it go, you quit seeing her. You said you'll take our marriage seriously."

Kendall's head hung low, ashamed of his dirty little secret. "It's..."

"She's better than me. I get it. She's a different person than I am. Sometimes I think I'm not in love with you, I'm in love with her because I seem to be getting drawn into everything she is." YN didn't stop for a second, not even to breathe.

"What do you mean? That's not how it-" she would not let him finish.

"She's everything I am not. I can't give you the things she can. I don't have her long blonde hair, or her perfect laugh to draw yourself into me, but I am your wife and you need to think about that before doing anything else!" YN's voice quivered, by now she had tears streaming down her face like she had never learned to be happy. "I wanna be around her presence, maybe she can teach me how to be like her, yeah? Then would you want me just as much?" YN asked in a tone which left a taste of bitterness on her tongue.

Kendall stood in one place, stunned. He was never the one to think before doing something wrong and he had done this many times with the same girl, what was he thinking?

"Love," he began and pressed a gentle hand against her cheek, swiping away her bitter tears away with the tad of his thumb. "I don't mean to hurt you purposely."

"Bullshit!" YN pressed her palm against his chest and pushed him away from her. He was a monster. "You don't love me. You love her!" She sobbed, breaking Kendall's heart. "Get away from me! Don't come back! You don't want to be here! I don't want you to be here!"

Thinking this is the end of six wonderful years, Kendall took a step back and examined her face. It flashed hurt, anger, sadness. Without saying a word, he turned around and left the place he'd call home. He had no answers to explain.

Before a week could even pass by, he was back in his home, taking the remainder of what was left, to his new home. A home where there was no love or emotions. It was just him and his tears. For the first time ever, he felt as though you never really do realise what you have until you lose it.

Kendall picked up the bag, causing a folded paper to fall out of a pocket. He hadn't put it there, that meant it had always been there or, YN had put it there. He cautiously unfolded it as YN's neat writing appeared on the paper. Written on it was what he assumed were lyrics. It wasn't a full song, but it meant something and Kendall broke down in tears.

"I know you'd come and get your belongings when I'm at work. If you ever find this, you'd be proud of me. I finally wrote a few lyrics. You always told me I was good at it, but it's funny how I kept denying. After you left, a pen and paper is all I had and there was no better way to express myself, so here you have it;

I wanna taste her lips, yeah cause they taste like you, I wanna drown myself in a bottle of her perfume. I want her long blonde hair, I want her magic touch, yeah cause maybe then you'd want me just as much... I've got a girl crush.

Turns out, I don't hate her after all, but I hope she can give you everything I couldn't. Here's a secret, will you be able to keep it? I've got a girl crush.. On her. Because maybe if I was anything like her you'd want me just as much."

Kendall's heart ached as he thought how this was a mistake, and that she doesn't deserve this, but it was too late now. There was one thing he couldn't ever take control over and that was the decisions his heart would make, and there was one thing YN couldn't ever accept; she wasn't good enough for the man she loved.

She had a girl crush, and in her wildest dreams... Kendall wanted her just as much as the girl who YN thought was now curled up in his arms, giving him the love she never could. But little did she know, his mistakes lead up to a closed door, and now he had nothing but the lyrics she once wrote with an empty heart about her girl crush.