Chapter 35

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Today was my birthday and the first thing I did was cry

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Today was my birthday and the first thing I did was cry. This was my first birthday alone without my mom. Mother's Day was hard enough but this...this felt different. Not having my best friend here hurt like hell. Every birthday I've had, she would come into my room and wake me up with chocolate chip pancakes and a bouquet of flowers from her garden.

Now, I have nothing.

I lay in my bed not wanting to get up. I could feel my lids swollen and my nose was clogged from crying last night. I just wanted this all to be a dream. I want my mom back. Life is so unfair.

I eventually fell asleep and woke up to loud music. It was hard to get my eyes opened due to the swelling. I looked at the time it was 10 pm. Guess I slept through my whole birthday. I groan forcing myself out of bed and going to the bathroom to wash my face. I looked at myself in the mirror and I felt hideous. My eye bags were darker than ever, my skin was pale from the lack of food and water, my lips were cracked, and my body aching from bruising.

I throw on a hoodie and sweatpants before heading down the stairs. I walk around and notice the alcohol bottles and the smell of weed mixed with the cigarette scent.  There were already people passed out on the couches and floor. I scrunch my nose up in disgust because half of them weren't wearing clothes. I finally got into the kitchen and thank God it was empty. I grab a water bottle from the fridge and chug it.

"Jane!" His voice boomed which startled me. I close the fridge door and turn around seeing Judge Luis. He was another friend of my father's. His bloodshot eyes gave it all the way.

He was high as f*ck.

"Hi," I press my lips together and start to walk away.

"Wait, don't you want to see the fireball we built outside? It's so pretty, like the sun," He starts laughing.

"Fireball?" I stop in my tracks looking at him.

"Yeah man, it's wicked. Come check it out," He said before burping and pointing east of the lawn. I saw the color orange brighten off the windows. I pushed past him and went out the sliding door, I started to run towards it.

I felt like someone just ripped my heart out of my chest and smashed it with a sludge hammer. I was lost for words. I couldn't breathe.

My mother's garden was in flames. I saw my father and his friends singing and dancing. I stormed over to him, "What the f*ck are you doing?" I push him.

"I'm singing. What's your problem?" He slurred and reeked of alcohol.

"Mom's garden is on fire! How could you?" Tears streamed down my face.

"F*cking relax! It needed to go anyways so I could build a pool," He pushed back.

"A f*cking pool?! You f*cking a*shole! This is all we had left of her! All I had left and you knew I was taking care of it. How could you!" I scream at him before ripping the bottle away from his hand.

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