A Guy In The Analysts Club

XI

He didn't even notice I stole two cigarettes from his pocket! Only to see INTJ coming back in calmly and snatch the two cigarettes from my hand.

--Thought I wouldn't notice? Amateur. (INTJ)

He scoffed and left again,leaving me dumbfounded. He was so smart! Maybe too smart...I started to think about how he took all my knives. HOW? I had my house locked. Wait...that...would mean...only one thing...oh shit. Oh good shit. Or oh bad shit. I don't really know.

~INTJ's POV~

I lied. I tricked everyone. I didn't knew the girl for two days. That would be pathetic. I know this girl for years. Years. I am obsessed with her. I know everything about her. Her passwords. Her preferences. Her relationships. I even have her spare keys. Every single detail. I have a secret wall full with her pictures. I have been stalking her for a long time now. But ENFP can't find out,she would think I am a psycopath. But I will be her psychopath. She is mine. No matter how crazy or stupid she is. I always went to her secret place to take her forgotten things. Any little thing. I sometimes break into her apartment at night to watch her sleep when I miss her too much. I love ENFP from the bottom of my heart. But I play it cool so no one would notice. I snuck up in her apartment to steal her knives when I found out about her mental state. She is the most precious girl in my eyes. What I wouldn't give for her to be mine! She is perfect. Oh,ENFP,I love you so much I will kill any outsider man who touches you!

~ENFP's POV~

He broke down in my apartment? I find out more interesting things by day! I better eat up the food before it gets cold.

~Half an hour later~

It was the best meal,I can't compare my crappy cheese sandwiches with this. Someone knocks on my door.

--INTJ again? Come in,chef! (ENFP)

It was ISFJ.

--Hi! What d-do you mean INTJ? Chef? You are t-too close to him in the last couple of days. You gotta spill the tea! (ISFJ)
--Well...I have to tell you lots of things,but you can't tell anyone! These are top secrets! (ENFP)
--Who is allowed to know? (ISFJ)
--Me,you,INFP and that's all! (ENFP)
--So I can still tell someone. (ISFJ)
--Ok,so,basically- (ENFP)

I stare at my apartment window,which had view to the corridore and saw INTJ. Holy mother of toads! He was staring directly at us through the window since I didn't close my blinds. He rised his thumb up and made a gesture like the thumb is a knife and he cut the neck with it. It's like an "I will kill you" sign. After that he put his pointer finger on his lips,a sign of "keep quiet". He had those crazy eyes,like he murdered someone and I was about to tell on him.

--Uh...I'd rather not tell you. (ENFP)

ISFJ looked at the window confused,and as I rubbed my eyes and looked at the window again,he disapeared. Just like a ghost.

--H-how is this p-possible? (ENFP)
--How is what p-possible? (ISFJ)
--He was t-there just a second ago! (ENFP)
--Who? INTJ? (ISFJ)
--You know what? N-nevermind. So I told you that I will tell you something. (ENFP)
--The INTJ thing? (ISFJ)
--What INTJ thing? No,what I did at the sleepover! (ENFP)
--Ohhh then I wanna hear! Because I know ESTP was there. (ISFJ)
--You naughty girl! Why didn't you come with us? You could have some fun...if you know what I mean. (ENFP)
--ENFP! (ISFJ)

She softly punches my shoulder.

--What? He would never turn you down! (ENFP)
--I am not ready! (ISFJ)
--Calm down,he understands you,he always tries to impress you,you know? (ENFP)
--HE? IMPRESS ME? I AM ABOUT TO FAINT. (ISFJ)

She fake fainted.

--Yo,get up! (ENFP)
--Okay,okay! So tell me what you did! (ISFJ)

~Half an hour later~

--They gave ESFP sleeping pills?! (ISFJ)

She started laughing.

--And you took them,too?! Even funnier! (ISFJ)

She started laughing louder.

--And the best part is that ESTP was the winner! You've got a strong future boyfriend! (ENFP)
--He was the last one standing? Oh,ESTP is so charismatic and cool! (ISFJ)
--He is! But he got some humor,too! (ENFP)
--Yea...talking about humour...you still have the cat whiskers on your face. (ISFJ)
--Shoot! Lemme wipe 'em real quick. (ENFP)

I went rushing to the bathroom and got some wipes. I tried to wipe,but it wouldn't come off. I tried even harder,still nothing. I messed it up even more! I tried and tried and nothing.

--ISFJ!!! (ENFP)
--W-what? (ISFJ)
--IT WON'T COME OFF! (ENFP)
--Oh no! (ISFJ)

I come back in the room and say:

--Seems like we're taking a trip to ESTP's! (ENFP)
--W-WE?! (ISFJ)
--YES WE! (ENFP)

I take my phone,keys and ISFJ and we left. I lock my door twice. Let's see who enters my apartment now! We left in a hurry and arrived to ESTP's. I knock on the door loudly and ESTP says:

--Don't come in,I'm fucking! (ESTP)
--I want to see! Maybe bring a volunteer,too! (ENFP)
--ENFP,are you out of your mind?! (ISFJ)
--Open the fucking door,ESTP! (ENFP)
--Ok,ok,chill! (ESTP)

He opens the door and a sparkle in his eyes appeared at the sight of ISFJ.

--Ohh...who do we have here? (ESTP)

He leaned in the doorstep and stared at ISFJ for some seconds,saying after:

--What's missing from the numbers 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9? (ESTP)
--Uh...0? (ISFJ)
--Nah,the only number missing here is yours. (ESTP)

He winked at her and she reddened.

--Uh...s-sure,I c-can give it to you,b-but ENFP has s-some business w-with you. (ISFJ)

ESTP invited us in and closed the door.

--So,what's the trouble? (ESTP)
--WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?! LOOK AT MY FACE! IT IS THE PROBLEM! (ENFP)
--Woah,chill out,ENFP! What about your face? Is it about the whiskers? So what? They are cute. You can just wash that off! (ESTP)
--THE PROBLEM IS THAT THEY WON'T WASH OFF! You and ENTP did this prank,didn't you? (ENFP)
--Well,of course! What did you expect? I just drew on your face with some markers! (ESTP)
--...what kind...of markers? (ENFP)

His grin turned into a panicked face.

--Uh...lemme,lemme look! Um...it's gonna be okay,ENFP,n-no need to go bonkers on me! It was f-fun! (ESTP)

He searched for the markers. Fear started spreading on his face,but he tried keeping it cool.

--T-these are normal m-markers,you know? (ESTP)

I knew he was lying,so I snatched the markers from his hand. When I saw the kind of markers,I shouted:

--PERMANENT MARKERS?! (ENFP)
--I-I SWEAR IT WAS A MISTAKE,WE COULDN'T SEE,IT WAS TOO D-DARK! I WOULD NEVER DO THIS TO YOU AND Y-YOU KNOW THAT! (ESTP)

~Meanwhile INTJ's POV~

She left finally. Making sure no one sees me,I unlock her door. Mhh,the smell of her apartment,I missed it. I throw myself in her bed,burying my face in her pillow.

--Ugh,ENFP,I love you and your smell. (INTJ)

The pillow smells just like your hair,my darling. Your strong bubblegum scent. My biggest advantage is that ENFP is a deep sleeper. She had no idea,all this time,when I came for little visits. What should I take this time? Oh,what is in this box? Opening it,I see her jewelry. Necklaces,bracelets,rings,earrings. Some of them are funky,some of them are elegant. I saw a bracelet with her name on it. It's perfect,I want it. I quickly took it and put it on my hand,exploring more of the place after that. I hid it and I went into her bed one more time. I was about to hug her pillow when I heard the loudest screams ever.
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--words:1389;
--oh,how the tables have turned.

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