Can't Get Out | Ryeji

Chapter 43

RYUJIN

When Yeji entered the bar, I stayed outside for some time and had another stick of cigarette. I was hurt. 

Not because I wasn't able to voice out my feelings. 

Not because she didn't knew what I've gone through those years.

Not because I'm angry with Yeji's father. 

But because I was too insensitive not to care that she must've been really hurt with our situation. 

"It's been so long that I didn't know you're already into that sticks."

It was Chaeryeong. 

"Hey." I greeted.

"Seems like you cried seeing your eyes." She said and stood beside me. "Did you talk to her?"

I looked down. I know she must've been angry with me too, just like Yeji. "Yeah.." My voice were becoming lower since I don't have any confidence to talk to her. 

"What she feels is valid." Chaeryeong said. 

"I know." 

"But I've known you for a long time and I'm sure you were gone for a reason. Am I right?"

I looked down and nodded. She really is my best friend. "I'm sorry." I said. 

"Our friendship was something I'm most comfortable with. We can be gone for days, we can survive not talking to each other for a long time but I think that doesn't define our trust to each other." She said but I didn't quite understand what she was saying.

"Hmm?"

"I'm saying even if it will take you more years, I will still forgive you." Chaeryeong said. "But being gone without a word is still wrong. You basically ghosted us. I still don't know what you've gone through but we could've helped you, you know."

"I'm really sorry." I uttered. "I don't even know where to start.." I said and threw the cigarette I just finished.

What happened during those years was still a sensitive topic for me, which may explain why it was difficult for me to bring it up with anyone to whom I owed an explanation.

"You don't have to say it now, Ryujin." Chaeryeong said and patted my back. "Let's take it step by step." She uttered. "But, please give Yeji time too. She was also in pain."

"She wants an explanation.."

"Who doesn't?"

Silence. 

The atmosphere was filled with silence since I didn't know what to reply to her. 

"Guys?" We looked back and saw Lia.

"Where's Yeji?" Chaeryeong asked.

"That- uh, she actually passed out." Lia uttered. "When she entered she said she'll have fun and yeah.. too much alcohol.. then she passed out."

Chaeryeong scratched her head as it was a rising problem, since they do not know what to do with Yeji.

And an idea just came to my mind. 

"You said we should take it slow and step by step, right?" I said.

Chaeryeong nodded and Lia looks confused since she doesn't know what I was talking about. 

"Let me take her home."