The Way I Am (DreamNotFound)

20

TW's:
-Mentions homophobia
-Mentions abuse/bullying
-Mentions missing person
-Mentions anger issues/mental illnesses

George's POV

I looked at my mum who was now calling the police, while walking back to our place.

'I'm calling for the police,' she said, putting the conversation on speaker.

'I'm calling for a missing boy.'

'Okay, since when is he missing?'

'Yesterday morning.'

'Does he more often leave?'

'We don't know him that long, but I don't think he did.'

'Anything that happened that led to this?'

'Yes, he got outed for his whole school and his uncle kicked him out. He's really mentally unstable.'

'May I ask what he suffers from?'

My mum looked at me and I nodded. 'He has insomnia, ADHD, depression and extreme anger issues,' I said.

'Has he implied anything about suicide?'

'He said he wanted to disappear and he said goodbye to me.'

'May I ask what you are from him?'

'I'm sort of his friend I guess, but we had something together and I'm with my mum.'

'Something together?'

'We just uh- liked each other a lot.'

'Okay, that's fine. Can I ask why his uncle kicked him out?'

'They are abusive, I don't know what happened, but he has been beaten up and they hated him because he is gay.'

'Did something specific happen?'

'Yeah, he got outed in front of the whole school and his homophobic uncle and aunt figured that out too.'

'Okay, do you have a picture of how he looks?'

'Yeah,' I said. 'How can I send those?'

'To this number,' the woman said, telling us a phone number. 'Is he tall or short? Does he have any things we can recognise him for?'

'He's really tall and he has those green eyes. I was with him yesterday and we had painted our nails together, there was some small bits of black nail polish left.'

'What was he wearing when you last saw him?'

'Just some black sweatpants and he was wearing a blue hoodie. It could have been purple too, but I'm colourblind.'

'That's fine, thanks. If you send me the picture, we will go look for him as soon as possible. It has priority, since he seems mentally unstable.'

'Are you going to find him?' I whispered.

'We are going to do everything to find him,' the lady said trying to make me calm.

'I really love him a lot, please. He can't die.'

'He isn't going to die, we will find him. Do you know if he had his phone or anything on him?'

'I don't know, I'm sorry. His uncle had taken his phone, I don't know if he got it back.'

'Can you tell me his number?'

I nodded, grabbing my phone to look up the number. I told her the number of Clay and she wrote it down. 'He's going to be okay, George. If you have any tips for us, please tell us immediately so we can find him quicker.'

I nodded even though they couldn't see that and I sent them multiple photos of Clay. My mum ended the call and I now bursted into tears. 'He's so beautiful, mum. I miss him so much.'

'I know, sweetie. I know. It's going to be fine, okay?'

'What if he died? Would I ever know?'

'We aren't going to think about that, okay? We are going to be positive. The police made finding him the number one priority at this moment, they will find him. The police is good in what they are doing.'

'I miss him so much,' I whispered again.

My mum smiled at me and wiped my tears away, kissing my cheek after. 'I love you, sweetie. It will all be okay, yeah?'

I nodded slowly. 'I think I'm going to sleep for a little, I'm really tired.'

'That's fine, honey. Do you want me to wake you up and paint your nails later?'

I shook my head. 'Clay painted my nails, I want to keep it on until he comes back.'

'Okay, sweetie,' my mum said as she pushed the door open. I walked inside and immediately went upstairs to lay down in my bed. I was exhausted and even though all stress, I still felt asleep for around four hours.

Later that day I had dinner with my parents and Maddie, but I hadn't been talking at all anymore. I really just wanted to sleep again and after dinner I immediately went upstairs again to sleep.

Maddie came after me this time and she sat next to my bed in silence, holding my hand. I knew she was just waiting for me to have the fifth mental breakdown of the day to calm me down. It didn't take long before I got another mental breakdown and I cried my eyes out.

'I love him so much, Maddie. I know I sound stupid, I'm just a school guy in love with some other guy, but I genuinely love him even though I fell in love with him this shortly ago. I think I fell in love way before, but I never let myself because he was this mean to me, but when he was here he was so extremely cute and sweet.'

'You're in love, George. That's totally not weird at all, I promise you. You've known him for three years now and I know you have always found him very attractive.'

'I did, but I didn't want to, I couldn't like a bully, but I guess I do. He's not a bully anymore, he's just so scared and I feel so bad for him.'

'Come, close your eyes and listen to me. Just imagine what you want to imagine again. Last times it made you fall asleep quickly. Just imagine Clay still being here, okay? Him holding your hand again, kissing you softly. Imagine the beach-.'

My eyes widened and I sat up, breathing heavily. 'MADDIE, I LOVE YOU.'

I jumped up and ran downstairs.

'George?' my parents yelled in confusion.

'I'm going to be back soon, don't worry about me,' I yelled.

I knew exactly where Clay was. He was at the beach, just as I made him imagine to be.

1018 words