The Way I Am (DreamNotFound)

9

TW's:
-Mentions death family member (details fire in a house)
-Mentions (child) abuse

Clay's POV

'George, can I tell you something?' I whispered.

I suddenly had a small bit of courage to tell them what was going on at home, maybe that was the first step to being myself a little more.

'Of course,' George said, rubbing my hand.

'I uh- didn't cut myself.'

'Oh, what? What the hell happened to you?'

'My uncle was mad at me.'

'Pardon? Your uncle did this?'

I nodded slowly and looked down at my arms.

'What happened?'

'I had a tantrum because they lock me up in my room all day long and uh- I screamed at them and my uncle came in and hit me with a photo frame. It was the one my dad gave to me and it was really precious to me,' I whispered.

'Why do you live with your uncle and aunt?'

'Uh- my parents died a few years ago.'

'Do you want to talk about it?'

'We all three were at home and uh- my mum was uh- baking something and she left to go do the laundry upstairs, but uh-. It caused a fire in our house and my mum ran down to stop it and so did my dad. I heard really loud screams and cries and I called the police and ambulance after a while and I ran downstairs-.'

I took a deep breath and looked at George's hand holding mine. I had never told this to anyone and it was a big trauma of mine. This was how my insomnia and anger issues started.

'And when I uh- got downstairs, I uh- saw my parents uh- burn,' I whispered. 'The ambulance saved them and me, but they both died later in the hospital.'

'I'm so sorry, Clay. That must have been a pure hell for you, I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I'm here for you, okay?'

'That's when my insomnia and anger issues started,' I whispered. 'I can't control myself.'

'I understand it, Clay.'

'And my uncle and aunt abuse me. I get locked in my room all day and I can't have food.'

'Clay, you're coming to my place today.'

'Really?'

'Yes, we are chilling today.'

'Are you sure? Do your parents hate me?'

'Not at all, we don't hate people that fast. We always see the best in everyone.'

I smiled shyly and nodded slowly. 'Thank you. George, I'm really sorry for disrespecting you and I definitely feel sorry for hitting you and calling you slurs.'

'It all has a reason, it's fine. Come, let's do your homework for the day so you will be able to go to the other classes.'

'But you?'

'I don't mind, I have good grades.'

'My grades are really bad,' I whispered. 'I have three really low grades and I don't think I'm going to pass this year.'

'Even if you don't, that's fine. You have had a really difficult period, it's normal to not being able to concentrate on school.'

'My uncle will kick me out when I don't pass. And my ADHD is really bad so I can't concentrate at all.'

'Let's not think about that now, we are going to do your homework and I'll help you.'

I nodded slowly and George grabbed their books, we started doing my homework and we were done within twenty minutes. I didn't go back to class anymore and so didn't George.

'George?'

'Yeah?' Their head lifted up and they looked at me.

'Uh- do you uh- actually think I'm uh- handsome?'

'Yeah, I do. You are really handsome.'

George's hand softly started stroking over my knee and I blushed, having my stomach fill with butterflies. I was literally so in love with George, my stomach was hurting so much. I knew my face was completely red and I hid my face a little.

'You're blushing.'

'S-shut up,' I whispered.

George smirked a little and kept rubbing my leg, making me completely flustered.

'I'll stop,' George giggled after I got so red that I thought my head was going to explode.

'Please, don't tell anyone,' I whispered.

'Why would I tell anyone you're blushing when I touch you?'

'Revenge or something.'

'I'm not going to take revenge on you, Clay.'

'Uh- o-okay. I uh- I a-am not uh- g-gay.'

George giggled. 'Sure, just really flustered in the presence of a boy.'

'Uh- no, it's uh-.'

'Clay, shut up. It's fine. Even if you were gay, that's totally fine.'

'Is it?' I whispered.

'Uh- I'm gay myself, Clay. Of course it's okay with me, I'm not judging someone for being gay when I'm gay myself.'

'I'm not gay.'

'That's fine, I'm not saying you are. If you are closeted, just come out when you want to.'

'I'm not uh- c-closeted.'

'I'm not saying you are.'

They smiled at me and grabbed my hand. 'I'll let my mum take care of your wounds. Have you made sure there's no glass in the wounds anymore?'

I shook my head. 'I ran away as soon as possible. I'm really sad, George. It was a picture of my parents and my dad had bought me the frame.'

'Is the frame also broken or just the glass?'

'I don't know for sure, I tried grabbing all pieces of glass, but I couldn't.'

'Is your room full of glass?'

I nodded slowly. 'I don't think my uncle cleaned it for me.'

'Do you want to stay with me tonight?'

'I think they will kill me if I do.'

'Do you want me to come home with you after we went to my place?'

'I don't think that's uh- a good idea, because uh- you are well- wearing nail polish.'

'So?'

'I don't have a problem with it anymore, but my uncle and aunt do and I think they will hurt you if they see you wearing it.'

George shrugged. 'I wouldn't mind, but if they will hurt you too after that, I won't come with you.'

'Well, they are probably going to forbid me to ever see you again.'

George nodded slowly. 'Come, let's go to our next class. We will hang out after school, okay?'

I nodded and walked with George to my next class.

1039 words