A Screwdriver, a Chainsaw and Second Thoughts

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It was very nice of America to invite us to go out with him. I was glad that I accepted his offer, since it let me get to know him and Russia better and I eventually even confided in them both about my problem. Russia wasn't even angry at me! There's a first. After some time, America started to talk about his family. He talked about his older brother Canada and his twin younger siblings, Australia and New Zealand. He became very outspoken and was enjoying the attention that the other people in the cafe. That was, until he leaned forward and spoke so quietly that I strained to hear.

"I'm an illegitimate child." He blurted out. Russia almost choked on his now cold drink.

"Whoa! America, too fast!" He exclaimed, his pupils became smaller, and his lavender iris expanded. "What?!" I just stared at him, in shock.

"Yeah. I thought you should know. Since we're on family topics."

"But...how? Who's your real mother or father?"

"My dad's Britain. Can't do anything about that. He'll always be. My mom isn't France."

"How did you find out?" I pestered him.

"I took one of those Genetic tests. For a laugh, you know. I didn't find the results funny that's for sure." He sighed. "I didn't tell my family at all, and I want to keep it that way. My real mother is Portugal. I haven't told her anything either. But I'm not saying my current family is horrible! I love France, I will always call her 'mom' and Canada, Australia and New Zealand will always be my real brothers. Dad will always be annoying and dull, but he's caring. I never was abused or anything. I was never ever treated like an outcast or someone different. So it's more of if my brothers find out than I tell my parents."

"Oh," Russia nodded. "I see. Since your parents know and everything."

"Mhmm." America agreed. "Depressing. But whatever. How about you, Russia? Any special things your family does? I really wasn't to get off topic. I just wanted you to know. You're my friends now."

"Do you tell all of your friends?" I asked.

"No. Just you guys." I puzzled over why he trusted us over all of his other friends all together. "Go on, Russ."

"Ah, well...my family is big. Currently, we have this big house in the middle of nowhere and my father and younger siblings live there. I have fourteen brothers and sisters."

"Fourteen?" America gasped. "Fourteen?!"

"Yes. Fourteen." Russia smiled. "But only me and my younger siblings lived in the big house. All of my older siblings left for university and never came back. Well, some of them do, but they don't always enjoy their stay. So me, Ukraine, Belarus and Kazakhstan, respectively by age."

"Cool. Any funny stories? Or are your sibling too little for that?"

"No. Ukraine is now thirteen, almost fourteen, and Belarus is ten, and Kazakhstan is five, almost six. So I had to do most of the grunt work. That doesn't mean that we were distant. No, we had fun together. Once Belarus let all of our chickens out while I was eating my lunch outside. Bad idea, never did that again." He laughed.

"What happened?" America leaned forward to listen.

"Our rooster, named Caramel I don't know why it's named that way, that's a female name, but Belarus wanted. Anyway, Caramel trotted up to me and pecked at the back of my bread and salad chicken sandwich. The rooster ate chicken! I couldn't believe it. The worst part is that Caramel attracted the attention of all of the other chickens too. Soon they all were eating my sandwich, which was chicken. After that I found that chickens do eat their own cooked meat. The best eater was a skinny little chick named Sunny. She even gnawed at my fingers. And Belarus never batted an eye, she said that she's been feeding them leftovers from her plate as well."

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