11| moongoddess
KIM TAEHYUNG
It's quiet. I don't know if I like it or not, sitting next to the Alpha in complete silence. It's awkward, yet I'm happy I don't have to talk with him yet. It gives me time to think of things I can say later under dinner.
But of course I don't. I want to but I can't. My eyes wander to the window, taking in the view of the forest. Trees wooshing out of sight, just as quick as it entered my view, indicating how quick we drive. Numerous shades of green filling my orbs and leaving me admiring and captivated. Making me keep looking at the alluring miracle called nature.
I wonder how the world was looking before creatures destroyed it, mostly humans. Is there even an era without humans, just earth and it's beauty?
The forest always fascinated me, tried to lure me with it's bright colors and delicious scents. I always want to go deeper in it, explore natures secrets and watch this whole different word grow and evolve.
The forest and our moon, a silver orb shining onto us when the sun leaves us alone, the place where our goddess lives, both make me get lost in thoughts and never ending questions. Luna, the moongoddess, mother of the wolves. I believe she exists, even though she makes me go through a lot, I can feel it. She's real.
"We're here", I hear and look up to see Alpha Jeon get out of the car. I quickly opens the door and step out of it too, well I tried. My foot get caught between the seat and the doorway and I almost fall out of the car.
I quickly gather myself and stand up straight to see the Alpha look at me with unreadable eyes. "Everything alright?" he asks and I blush ashamed as I nod and close the door.
"You know.. it's maybe easier when you stand on both feet and don't stumble over everything", the Alpha smirks with amused eyes and I gulp as the blush gets redder, which only seems to satisfy the Alpha more.
"Thanks for the advice, Alpha", I say and he scoffs a sort of laugh as he opens the door for me. I blush more as he let me go first and try not to think more of his sudden gentleman behavior than necessary or needed. I shouldn't.
As soon as we are seated around a small table, I start to realize how unpleasant this is. He sits in front of me, meaning he'll be looking at me automatically. And the worst part is, I look back at him. So before the evening had the chance to start, I already predicted there will be a lot of me blushing and looking down.
"Hello, I'm your waiter for tonight. Let me hand you the menu's already", a man's voice says and we look up to see a nice-looking guy. I smile and take the menu from him.
"Would you like something to drink already?" the male asks and we nod, I go for a simple glass of water and the man now looks at Jeongguk. He also gets water, which I for some reason didn't expect.
The male leaves after writing it down and that means we're alone again, an awkward silence laying itself upon us as I look at the table and bite my lip.
"How are you?" the Alpha's deep voice suddenly speaks and I look up to see him look at me. I shrug. "I'm okay, how about you?" "I'm just fine."
The silence is back. It's eating me alive, I push my brains to think of something, something to ask so I show interest.
"What is your name? Like, I know you're Alpha Jeon, but never knew your real name", I say, blushing a bit embarrassed that I don't even know that. Although he didn't give me an proper chance to ask, nor did he tell me.
He looks at me, unreadable eyes fixed on mine and looking right through my soul, creating a feeling inside me, a warm tingling sensation. It climps up from my stomach towards my cheeks and add a rosy hue to my already red tinted cheeks.
"Jeongguk, Jeon Jeongguk", he says and I nod softly. He has a nice name, that's for sure. Again silence.
"Why did you accept the offer?" he suddenly asks, still looking at me with that dark indescribable gaze. I gulp and want to look away, but the darkness in his eyes holds me captive.
"The A-Alpha said you'll s-start a war with them. And because your pack is so much bigger and stronger, I knew you'd win. I didn't want to bring my parents in danger", I mumble and finally can leave the man's piercing eyes. Though, unwillingly I look back and get locked again, away from the rest of the world, falling deeper and deeper in the dark depths of his orbs, even though it's scaring me.
"We wouldn't have attacked your former pack", Jeongguk says and I gulp slightly. I didn't have to be here.
"Your drinks", the waiter says and places our glasses with water on the table. I thank him politely with a smile and see him smile back.
"Did you decide what you want to eat yet?" he asks and I look at my closed menu. I didn't even open it yet. "No, can we get five more minutes?" Jeongguk asks and the man nods before leaving again.
We both open the menu and look through it. When Jeongguk closes his I look up. "What do you take?" I ask curiously and he tells me he takes a pizza. I look back at the menu and nods as I decide to do that too.
The man comes back and we tell him what we want. I now notice a man staring at us as I look past the waiter and frown little before looking back at Jeongguk. Creep..
"How come your brother isn't the head Alpha?" I ask curiously, immediately finding a way to keep the conversation going. "He's not an Alpha", Jeongguk simply says and I frown. "He's an Omega, he just doesn't behave like one or feel like one", Jeongguk shrugs. "He also doesn't smell like one", I say and he nods. "He's weird." I giggle softly by the way Jeongguk rolls his eyes and calls him weird and see his eyes snap my way, making me blush and look down.
"Do you like being an Omega?" Jeongguk then asks. I felt giddy inside by the question, for multiple reasons. He shows interest, I don't care if it's so it wouldn't get awkward or because he really is interested, he still does. He talks to me in the first place and the question itself.
Do you like being an Omega?
Do I? Do I like being an Omega? Sure it's harder sometimes, I'm weaker, less manlier and let's just say most Omegas are getting treated as if they're worthless. I nag about it a lot, but honestly never wanted to be an Alpha or Beta. So I guess I don't mind being one?
I shrug. "I guess.. it's not always as easy, but every rank has their ups and downs, right?" I ask and Jeongguk shrugs. "What are those downsides then?" Jeongguk asks and I bite my lip as I can think of a downside.
"You're a girl!" "You're weak!" "You're not only useless, you're also ugly. No girl will ever want you!"
I felt my lip tremble, a harsh punch lands in my stomach, making me bent over and hold it in pain.
"You'll get selled of to an Alpha and he'll use you as his slave! You're nothing more than a stupid weak slave!"
Another punch. I felt tears rush down my cheeks as I look up to my classmates, to my friend. "M-Minho help", I stutter as they keep kicking me, the young boy looks at me blankly. "Why would I? You are just an Omega", he says and walks away with the other children running after him, finally letting me go.
"W-Well.. I'm weak and less m-manlier than others", I mumble and look away again.
Even after all the things I've been through, simply because I'm an Omega, I'm not ashamed of my rank. I'm ashamed of how it makes me so different from the others, how it makes me weaker, more feminine. Of course I want to fit in, but I realize this is me and I can't change that. The moongoddess made me an Omega for a reason. And whenever I'm with Jimin, he reminds me it's just a rank, it doesn't make me any less wolf or human.
"Do you mind that?" Jeongguk asks on and I shrug. "A little... but also not. I don't know", I mumble. "You don't mind it yourself, you're just scared of what others think, aren't you?" I look up with widened eyes and gulp, how did he know? I didn't even know till he spoke it out...
"Do you like being an Alpha?" I ask, ignoring his question. "Yea", he says and I tilt my head. "Does being an Alpha have bad sides?" I ask curiously and he shrugs. "I guess you always have to proof yourself. If you don't, people will think you're not worth the rank and leave you", he says and I frown, mind spinning with thoughts as his dark eyes show a glint of emotion for just one second, a vulnerable glinster adoring the black orbs like the stars in the night do.
"What do you mean?" I ask and he just looks at me. He doesn't want to answer the question, I can sense it. Lucky for him, our food arrives. I'm surprised how fast that went, forgetting about my question and look at the waiter to thank him. Not noticing how the Alpha keeps looking my way.
While eating we talk less, just enjoying our food as it starts getting darker and darker. We got a table outside and I'm very thankful for it. Because now I can watch the moon, I can watch the sky turn into a dark blue painted canvas, with white sparkling stars decorating it and making the moon feel less lonely.
And I smile lightly, because one of those stars is my mate, and watching the stars, as beautiful as ever, I know he's doing alright. I find it cruel, the moongoddess did this to us, but the innocent white moon, almost full, makes me feel peaceful. As if everything is how it should be. As if I can live a life with happiness, even after all that happens.
"You like the stars?" Jeongguk asks and I nod without looking. "Yes.." I breath out, hypnotized by the glittery lights above us. "Don't you?" Taehyung asks and hears Jeongguk hum. "It's beautiful", he murmurs and I look at him to see him look at me already.
"They are."
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I have so many ideas, however, when I want to write them down, I forget them..
Hope you enjoyed this chapter! It was quite hard to write to be honest.
xx Ally