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I tried to convince myself that I was still angry at Demilade, which I still am, by the way. I thought he was selfish, only thinking about himself, but I hated I couldn't voice out my thoughts even more.
When I agreed to this, I automatically said yes to everything until they settled abroad. I can't complain and he didn't do wrong, yet. If he doesn't include me in the decision making and tells me things last minute, next time I am going to be mad at him.
I stayed in my room for the rest of the day so he'd miss me and crave my presence as dumb as that may sound. I have been in my room since 10 o'clock and it's five in the evening now and I'm extremely bored.
I had gotten tires of viewing photos of celebrities and watching videos on Instagram. 7 hours is a really long time. I went out for a while, so I wore my slippers and left my room.
As soon as I stepped out, I realized all I wanted was to see him. Its not a great feeling I tell you. I saw him watching TV in the living room, but I headed for the kitchen first. I wanted junk food but there wasn't any, so I opted for a fanta.
I sat down quietly beside him, my heart hammering in my chest. I didn't want to like him and now I had a crush on him, just great. Quickly I remembered something.
"Have you eaten?" I asked before I could analyse the question. It wasn't an inappropriate question to ask, I concluded.
He turned to face before shooting me a small smile, "Yes I have".
"OK." It went quiet again as both of us turned back to the TV. But then it didn't last long because I realized I needed to tell him something important. I cursed myself for having to talk to him again.
"You know... I began... I have never travelled out of Nigeria before. There is a visa and passport requirement. I don't have those, so how..."
"I'm working on it. You don't have to worry." He told me and he didn't care to elaborate. He turned back to the TV and I couldn't help but be angry at the way he acted sometimes. He made angry by just doing nothing.
"And you don't have to worry about the money. I need you to just provide with necessary documents when I ask for them," He said, still not looking at me.
"Okay". I stood to leave, sensing that the conversation had ended. I was partly angry at how he always ignores me and just this morning he asked us to be friends.
"Where are you going? I thought we were watching this together?" I turned around when he said. "Sit with me"
"I'd rather not," I replied dryly while gritting my teeth. I really wanted to sit with him, be around him all the time, but the sooner I learn to control my desires, the better.
"Come on. Stop being stubborn".
I stood still, contemplating on if I should agree or not, but the anger deflated the moment he grabbed my hand. It was the first time he'd touched me.
I didn't feel tingling or anything like that, but in his touch I felt something I didn't want to stop feeling. I felt like he could be mine, but then he wasn't. It was crazy.
While we were watching High Strung, I stole glances at him. He didn't look at me. His attention was solely on the movie. He must really love Lucy to do this for her. No one had ever loved me like that except my mom.
My mom died really young and ever since then, I had been on my own. My dad didn't care about what I did with my life. I didn't like any of my step mom's and I knew it was a mutual feeling. My elder sisters and brothers don't live in Nigeria and we stopped communicating a long time ago.
Everybody has to find their own way in this chaotic world. We never really had much to talk about. The age gap is quite a lot, so it's difficult, but the love and bond will share is something I would always cherish. They send me money every month and that's enough.
I loved my junior siblings, though, and they adored me. I buy them gifts whenever I can and I get myself involved in their lives as much as possible.
Family is important to me. It's just building my family I am not fully sure about. It's a lot of work and I didn't want to lose myself doing house chores and raising children.
I always imagined that id adopt children maybe two or get a sperm donor if need be. Yeah, I know it's crazy, but it's not confirmed yet.
Demilade had a wonderful relationship with his parent and his siblings. Ope (the one that got me my wedding gown) and his brothers Ola and the first born Darasimi.
Oyinkan! Oyinkan! Oyinkan! I heard someone called in the distance.
"Hey" he tapped me again."Are you alright?"
"Yes. I'm fine," I answered timidly as he was really close. Not soon close, but just a few feet away. I had worry all over his face.
"You spaced out. What were thinking about? I called your name like five times before you heard me." He said in annoyance.
"I'm sorry." I apologized. I must have gotten him so worked up. It's been a while since I spaced out like that. I guess old habits never die.
Introverts like me live in their heads, so I have read. I think a lot and sometimes I'd rather think what I'm feeling rather than say or voice out my thought. It's easier that way. No one has to know.
It's partly his fault, too. Why did he have to get me so worked up and in my feelings?
"I was thinking about my life," I told him half the truth.
I watched as he drew his eyebrows together, then shake his head at me
"Don't think too much," he added as he played the movie.
"Okay sir," I joked, and we both laughed."
"Wow! I didn't know you could make jokes," he told me, smiling, and I just shrugged.
"You don't know me."
Does he think he knows everything about me I pondered? I looked at him and our eyes locked. Suddenly he looked like he wanted to ask me something. I noticed this so I spoke first.
"Is there something you want to ask me? You are looking like you want to tell me something." I asked him, a little curious myself.
"Actually, there is... Why did you agree to do this... this marriage?" He kept his gaze on me, waiting for a reply or reaction.
"What do you mean?" Oh, I heard him clearly. I just wanted to stall as much as I could. Acting completely oblivious so he'd get off my case. I don't think it's working
"I know who you are, who your father is. I saw how much he spent on the wedding. So I know money isn't your problem. So why did you agree to marry me?"
"I have my reasons and you're right. I don't need money, but I need that money for a project I want to work on. And, my father's money is not my money. We don't have the best relationship."
"What about your mom? What lie did you tell her?"
"My mom passed away years ago."
"Wait! Who was that woman then?"
"That's my stepmom." I gulped. Talking about her has never been easy.
I emphasized on that so he could understand that he doesn't know me at all. Something sparked in his eyes. It looked like sympathy.
"Okay. I am sorry." He broke eye contact first and relief flushed through me.
Just when I thought the probing had ended. "For a while I thought you liked me," he said non-chalantly.
My eyes widened as he said this and I think he caught my reaction cause he turned to me yet again, angling his head to the side.
"Are in love with me?" He asked, and I swallowed. It suddenly became hot in here.
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I wrote this story when I was 15 years old. That was when I decided I wanted to write and I haven't regretted my decision ever since.
I love this chapter a lot and I really had to change sometimes, so it would be more interesting to read. Stay with me, for there is more to come.