I’m on my way to Emma aka Bitch. When we talked on the phone she insisted that I would come over as soon as possible to tell her about Zayn. I was so happy with the way she reacted, I wanted to tell her all the amazing things about Zayn. I was so freaking ecstatic that I was stupid enough to believe that even Hazza and Zayn could get along. I was in such a good mood that I thought it was a good idea (no, I even thought it was a great idea) for them to meet. I thought nothing could go wrong. I desperately wanted the two persons I love so dearly to like each other, get to know each other. But I was just fucking stupid.
The moment they saw each other it was clear that they didn’t like each other. In that instant I knew and I felt something was wrong. The whole encounter was just awful and immensely uncomfortable. They didn’t even make an effort to ask one another about each other, instead they begin arguing the minute I was gone.
It made me so fucking exhausted and angry that I didn’t want to speak to them. Clearly, they also didn’t want to speak to me. Both of them didn’t call or text that day and I was too pissed off to care.
The next day I felt slightly better. The biggest anger and disappointment was gone. I realized that maybe I was too optimistic, maybe I expected too much of them. That realization made it a little bit better. I came to the conclusion that they probably have to get used to each other. Get used to being part of each other’s life.
Or at least, that is what I utterly hoped. It was the only thing that made me feel like things would be okay. It was the only thing that kept me from worrying what to do.
With that hope in mind I went to school. Zayn tried to be his normal self by greeting me with a kiss and having his hand on my thigh, but something was off. His posture seemed tense. And every time I tried to ask him about yesterday and asked what they argued about, he just shushed me. He said that he wanted to pay attention. It was crystal clear to me that he just wanted to avoid the conversation. He didn’t want to tell me what happened yesterday or how he felt about it. It annoyed me so freaking much.
I’m not used to the silent treatment from Zayn. Normally whenever something happens he opens his mouth. We argue. We fight. We make up. We make out. That is our thing. But all of a sudden he didn’t want to talk.
When school finished I decided to go home, alone. Zayn seemed upset about it, but didn’t say anything. I just needed some time alone and more importantly I needed to speak with Hazza.
I called Hazza, expecting him to tell me what happened. But surprisingly he also gave me the silent treatment and didn’t tell me what they argued about. It pissed me off, because I could tell that something was bothering him. Just as with Zayn. I’m not even sure why I pushed him to tell me what happened. I assumed I didn’t even want to know the real answer, since it probably would only make things worse. However, I kept pushing. It was like a part of me needed to know what happened. It seemed like I was searching for the drama, as if I needed it to live.
“Fuck Hazza.” I said. “Just fucking tell me what you think.” I demanded.
“It wouldn’t matter.” He said in response.
“Why the fuck wouldn’t it matter?” I asked with clear irritation in my voice, not understanding what he meant.
“I don’t know.” He said vaguely.
“Haz, out with it.”
After a lot of persuasion on my side he finally said something honest.
“I hated it okay?” He said with much desperation.
“Okay.” I breathed out, at least thankful for his honesty. “Why?”
“What do you mean?”
“Well why did you hate it?” I asked.
“I don’t know.” He said again.
I rolled my eyes in annoyance. “Can you please stop with this and just tell me the truth?” In some ways it looked like the time I told him about Zayn. But this time it’s Hazza that didn’t want to tell me the truth.
“I just want to make you happy.” He answered.
“Do I sound happy to you?” I asked bitterly. “I want you to be honest. I don’t want you to make me supposedly happy, which I’m not for the record. I want to know what you want.”
“You know what I want!” He said desperately.
“No I don’t!” I yelled frantically. “Tell me.”
“If you don’t know what this is about, I don’t want to tell you. It’s fine.”
“No it’s not! Stop being so immature and tell me what the fuck is wrong.” I hissed, getting angrier by the minute. All my good hope for a fresh start just seemed to have disappeared.
“I can’t! Besides it wouldn’t make a difference.”
“How the fuck do you know that if you won’t tell me?”
“Just go to Zayn and be happy.”
“Seriously? Are you going to do this?”
Hazza didn’t reply, just breathed into the phone. He was being such an immature child and I didn’t know how to handle it.
“Well call me back when you do, okay?” I hung up frustrated.
----------
“Bitch!” I wave at her.
With a smile on her face she looks in my direction. “Hehe, there you are! Where have you been?”
“Where have I been? I already was here like a half hour ago, waiting for you!” I lied to her.
“Yeah right.” She rolls her eyes. “Come on in.”
“Yeah really.” I smirk. I step off my bike and follow her into her unbelievable immense and lovely house.
“So how are you?” I ask as we walk to the kitchen.
She shrugs. “Very busy with essays and stuff. It takes so many time and energy. I barely see Michael and when I do things aren’t that great.”
“I’m sorry.” I genuinely say. She has been with Michael for over 4 years. It seems like the most bizarre combination, but it really works. “And yeah, I know all about studying. It’s fucking terrible!”
“Oh right, it’s almost time for your exams right?”
I nod. “And I still haven’t done anything.”
“You will make it. You always do. Barely, but you manage.” She grins at me.
It’s great to finally see Bitch again. I became friends with her through Hazza, but I instantly loved her. She is so crazy and fun, but she can be a very good friend when you really need one. Right now I can really use one.
We sit down at the dining table. “So tell me about this Zayn huh?”
“Well first of sorry for the way you had to find out.” I apologize. It certainly wasn’t the way I wanted to tell her.
“Yeah I was kind of shocked to be honest. Why couldn’t you tell me?”
“To be honest. Mostly because of Hazza. I didn’t want him to know, so I kept it a secret for all of you.”
“Hmmm. I kind of get that. I might have a big mouth, but I wouldn’t have told Hazza.” Bitch assures me.
I nod slightly embarrassed. “Yeah I know or I should have known. It just kept getting worse and worse, I was in this web of lies and I didn’t know how to get out of it.”
“You told me Zayn is that guy from your class? The one you hated so much? I remembered when you called me and you were so angry and upset about him. I really thought you hated him.” She chuckles.
I nod frantically. “I really hated him. I hated him so freaking much. But somehow I also found him intriguing. He is amazing really.”
Bitch smiles at me. “I’m glad to hear that, but somehow you don’t seem so happy?”
I look up at her and sigh. “It’s just all so fucking complicated. I finally had the courage to tell Hazza, but he completely freaked out! Afterwards he told me that he was okay with it so I wanted them to meet, but let’s just say that it didn’t go well. When we called the next day Hazza told me that he hated it but he didn’t tell me why. I didn't know what to do so I hung up... and now Hazza doesn’t even return my calls.” As I blurt out all those words, my concerns, I feel a sting in my stomach.
“To be honest I am not that surprised.” Bitch tells me.
“Why?”
Bitch shrugs casually. “Why? Well I always assumed that you guys were in a relationship, although you guys didn’t want to use that word.”
“Yeah but it’s different.” I immediately say in defense.
“Does Hazza feel the same?” Bitch questions.
“I thought so.” I admit. “But right now I am not so sure.”
“Yeah I understand.”
“Do you know something?” I ask carefully.
Bitch shakes her head. “No it’s not like he told me something. It’s just the way he looks at you, the way he cares for you. Basically in everything that he does it screams love.”
“But I love him too!” I quickly reply.
“I know you do. I can tell that you love him so much, but are you in love?”
Am I in love? I question myself. I honestly don’t know. I feel so much love for Hazza, but am I in love? I think I am in love with Hazza, but I’m also in love with Zayn. Is that possible?
“I feel like it’s more than that. I don’t really know how to say it.” I breathe out heavily, feeling the sadness and confusion taking control of me.
“Hey Lou? It’s okay. You don’t need to have everything figured out right now.”
I give her a small grateful smile. “Yeah okay.”
“Besides, I want to know more about this Zayn boy you find so intriguing!” She says teasingly.
“Okay.” I agree with a chuckle. I can mope around feeling sorry for myself, making myself go crazy with anxiety, guilt and sadness, but right now I don’t want to do that. Honestly, I rather just want to forget about both of them right now. But I understand that Bitch wants to know about Zayn. And, besides his immature behavior when it comes to Hazza, Zayn really is amazing.
“He really is amazing and he is unbelievable beautiful. Like almost unhuman, it’s breathtaking but so annoying.” As I talk about Zayn I feel a faint smile appear on my face.
“That sounds very promising, when will I meet him?”
“You have to wait a while. He just met Hazza and it was ugly. They didn’t even try to get along and the minute I was in the bathroom they started arguing, it almost turned into a fight! And something about Zayn is different since he met Hazza, but he doesn’t want to tell me what happened. He acts normal and we are just like before, but something has changed.”
“Jeez Lou, I can only imagine how awful that must have been.”
“THANK YOU!” I exhale in relief. “Finally someone who understands me! It was a fucking disaster. Everything is a disaster! Zayn is in the closet because he is a Muslim and–.” I ramble on until Bitch cuts me off.
“He is a Muslim?” Bitch gasps. For a moment she seems completely flabbergasted, but collects herself just as easily. “Whoa, didn’t expect that.”
“Yeah I know. It’s all just freaking insane. The whole school basically knows about us, but for the rest it is all a big secret.”
“I’m surprised we haven’t heard of it. You would think it will spread like fire! I mean a Muslim boy with a Gabber boy. It’s freaking hilarious!” She laughs.
“Well I don’t think it’s fucking hilarious.” I say moody and slightly irritated. “A lot of people at our school give us shit, his community and even his fucking friends and family can’t know about us and fucking Hazz– .”
“Hey calm down. I know it’s hard, hell, it even gives me perspective on my relationship, but if you really want to be with this Zayn guy, you have to sacrifice for love right?”
“Yeah I suppose…” I say with doubt in my voice. Right now I’m not sure of anything.
“What do you say we forget about this drama and have some fun? We can call Niall ask if he wants to join?”
“Good idea. I can use some distraction. I’ll call Niall.”
“Hello.”
“Hi, it’s Louis. Is Nialler there?”
“Nialler?” His mother asks confused.
“Niall? Is Niall home?” I ask again.
“Oh… I think so. Hold on.” His mother says. Ugh I really hate that bitch! She wasn’t even home when he got released out of jail!
I hear a lot of rumbling from the other side and then someone coughs loudly into the phone. “Who are you?” She asks with suspicion in her voice.
I’m dumbfounded. She doesn’t even realize who I am? “I’m Louis, a friend of Niall.”
“Oh.” She says curtly and she’s gone.
I wait at least a minute on the phone until I finally hear Niall’s voice.
“Hey.”
“Hey Nialler.”
“Louis!” He says cheerfully.
“Gosh, your mother didn’t even know who I was!”
“Yeah I know.” Niall chuckles embarrassed. “Things are not very good right now. She isn’t feeling well lately and she blames me.” He says with a sigh.
“What a bitch!” The words just come out of my mouth. “Sorry Niall, I just think that’s bullshit.”
“It’s okay, I know you mean well.”
“Yeah I do. So how are things?”
“Well I’m not feeling very well, but luckily I can clean at the gym Liam works at.”
“Liam lets you clean? What a great friend!” I say mockingly.
Nialler laughs, a full on laugh. “Yeah, he even lets me clean his shit on the toilet!”
“Fucking nasty! How fucking dares he! We are so going to take him back!” I grin.
“Yeah.” Nialler chuckles. “It’s the best he could do for me.”
“I know, but he is still going to be sorry. Mark my words!” I say persistent.
“Okay that’s a promise.”
“What do you say we have a little party of our own at Bitches house? Just you, me and Bitch?”
“I would love that.” He agrees.
“Yeah we can all use some fun and distraction.”
“Yes! Fuck drama, let’s have a party!”
“LET’S HAVE A PARTY!” Bitch and I scream in the phone before we hang up.
I just want to forget everything and have fun with a couple of my amazing friends.
“I love you.” I say emotionally and tightly hug Bitch. I’m so glad I have such wonderful friends.
“Did you use XTC?” She teases me, knowing I’m always more clingy and emotional whenever I use.
“Ah fuck off.” I grin.
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Another chapter! (I just saw I have 10k views THANK YOU SO FREAKING MUCH!)
Thank you all for your comments =) I noticed that it was fairly equal between team Larry and team Zouis. I'm not going to tell you what happens, but the only thing that I can say is that there will be a lot of drama, but also some very sweet moments! (for both Larry and Zouis).
9 chapters to go or maybe 10 (honestly I'm not sure bc I still have to write most of it, but probably circa 10). A LOT will happen in those chapters!
Hope you liked this chapter and I hope people want to stay till the end of this story! Your support means the world and makes me want to dance (and believe me I don't dance!)
Oh and I honestly didn't know who I should give the dedication to, since all of you were so nice and amazing; but I gave it to Mrs_Tomlinson because she was the first to comment =D and you rock ^^ But the rest of you are equally amazing!! ^^