It has only been a weekend, but it feels like ages since I've been to uni after moving in and settling into the new apartment. It already feels homey, which is something I'm grateful and kind of ambivalent about. Yoongi was one of the reasons why I didn't feel like shit all the time and I enjoyed the little therapy session we had. I haven't spoken to Evelyn ever since that last phone call that ended up being another 'lovely' fight and I'm anxious as hell to go to my building even though we're on different majors. What if I accidentally bump into her? What if she sees me and she starts crying? What if she just gives me the cold shoulder? My emotions are all over the place and my mind is bombarded with all the 'what ifs' when it concerns Evelyn because all I want to do is talk to her and see if she's doing okay while another part of me desperately wants to avoid any sort contact with her. Another big part of me just wants her-wants to be inside her to be more precise.
I miss her like hell and I know she feels the same.
Thankfully, I haven't seen her at all during my morning classes so I decide to join my friends for lunch at a place outside campus which is like a restaurant-bar. That's better, I think to myself, distancing myself from the campus border making it less possible for me to see Evelyn.
When I step inside the restaurant, I spot my friends in a nearby booth and I give them a slight wave.
"Dude, you broke up with Evelyn!" Is the first thing that comes out of Sam's mouth.
"We said hi to her earlier and she brushed us off." Dylan continues and I sigh taking some fries off his plate. "I mean we already know she hates our guts but she was being more polite this time." He chuckles like a jerk and I punch his arm.
Before I say something, my friend Taehyung steals the spotlight. "So you finally listened to us eh?"
"Alright guys, first of all shut up." I start and they burst into a pile of snickers and cackles. "Secondly, yes we did in fact break up."
"Tell us how it happened." Dylan says.
"Yeah, but spare the mushy details." Sam adds.
"We kind of finalized things a little earlier." I mutter.
"So what are you gonna do now?" Taehyung asks. "I mean you guys live under the same roof."
"Not quite." I say.
"You moved out?" Taehyung pipes.
"Yeah,"
"Dude why didn't you call us?" Sam shoots. "We could have helped your frail ass."
I. Am. Not. Frail. Or am I? I am the shortest in our group and the only person I know who's as short as me is Yoongi and maybe Nox.
"Shut up," I snap. "It's alright, I didn't have to move a lot of stuff anyways." I lie.
"So how's the new place?" Dylan asks. "When can we come over?"
"The new place is actually quite nice." I reply truthfully.
"Really?" Taehyung asks.
"Yeah," I say "it's affordable too."
"Dude when can we come?" Dylan insists. "Got any hot neighbors?"
"I'm good friends with my neighbor." I start. "But I don't think he's your type." That seems to make him quiet down.
"That's good." Taehyung comments. "You're handling this better than I expected."
"Why what did you expect me to do?" I question.
"Cry like a little bitch for her toxic ass." Sam says and I elbow him. "Asshole," he grunts.
"I'm very concerned about her though." I mutter.
"I think it's best if you maintain a distance for a while." Dylan advices and Sam shakes his head.
"Make that forever." He says rubbing his arm.
"I really want to see her." I breathe.
Dylan runs a hand through his hair and then intertwines his fingers on the table. "Dude. You finally escaped a dysfunctional relationship with that whacko and you're just gonna crawl back to her like the masochist that you are."
"Lay off." Sam says.
"Look Jimin, she's not gonna be the only girl." Taehyung continues. "Just focus on yourself for now."
Yeah, he's probably right. I haven't focused on myself for a while now.
"That also means you gotta get laid sometime soon." Sam adds and I glare daggers at him. "Like you haven't thought of it yet." He snorts.
Honestly, I'm not that desperate for sex at the moment. But I am craving her. Her sweet milky skin with slight freckles she so desperately wants to cover with makeup. I want to tug on those lively red curls of hers and fuck-I want her to sink her nails on my back. I want to kiss her until she can longer speak and I want to give her all of my undivided attention just so that I can make her feel good. My dick gets hard just by thinking about it and I'm lost in a never ending trance.
Getting over her is a pain in the ass.
"You still thinking about her?" Sam asks teasingly.
"God, I don't understand what's so great about her that you're so fucking invested." Dylan says.
"If you were in a relationship for one and a half year trust me you'd feel as shitty as I do." I say.
"Yeah," he sighs.
"Anyways, let's celebrate." Sam says.
"Celebrate?" Taehyung pipes.
"Yeah dude." Sam returns. "Jimin is finally off the hook and ready to live the single life again. Trust me when I say this my friend, but breaking up with that ginger is the best decision you've ever made. She's prevented you from being your best self man. She tells you not to go to New York for that amazing job opportunity, she tells you how to act and how to organize your own space-Honestly, if I were you I would have bailed the first chance I got."
"That's because you're selfish as hell." Taehyung states.
"And you only care about getting pussy." Dylan fires.
"Alright, true." Sam agrees anyway. "But come on guys, it's about time we go to the club without Evelyn being the killjoy. Everytime we go to the club she always has to check on Jimin like every fucking hour."
Alright, he has a point. That was frustrating.
A waitress comes by to ask if we want any drinks and I ordered a burger with fries while the guys asked for Cokes.
"She's not your mother." Sam snaps as soon as the petite waitress leaves. "So lets go out, get shit-faced and forget we ever existed."
"And make sure you get some pussy while you're at it J." Dylan adds.
"Seriously, when was the last time you've had sex?" Sam asks. "And I know that you and ginger go hard but you've been fighting a lot before the break up."
"Unless you fucked while she was angry." Dylan says.
"Assholes," I boom "haven't you heard of-I don't know privacy?"
"You've been bragging about the shit you nasty motherfuckers were doing while things were going smoothly so drop the excuses." Sam laughs.
I haven't had sex in two weeks.
"Yeah, and you were so proud about it too." Dylan proceeds.
"I can satisfy my needs just fine." I say and I realize that it was a huge mistake.
"I guess porn is a good way to go." Dylan shrugs.
"Yeah, man so how often do you satisfy yourself?" Sam asks. "Also, tell me did you jerk off at all while you were with the ginger?"
Taehyung laughs and everyone stares at him. "While he was with Evelyn he's been having sex almost every day are you fucking joking?"
"Well maybe she wasn't good enough." Dylan smirks.
"Or J just wanted some time alone." Sam grins. "Cause Evelyn doesn't know about boundaries."
"Guys, enough." I say sternly. "You're starting to piss me off."
"Alright you know what? Fuck the club." Taehyung suddenly throws. "It's clear that Jimin isn't over Evelyn so there's that and he will feel guilty if he has sex with someone new right after the breakup. It's his go-to reaction to things he can't help it. So, let's give it some time and wait for Evelyn to move on first and then Jimin will have the green card."
Dylan and Sam glare at Taehyung like he's from outer space and they burst out laughing.
"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard!" Dylan chortles.
"Yeah, that's total bullshit." Sam snorts. "He's fucking broken up with ginger so just let her be. Who cares about her?"
"I care for her shit head." I retort.
"My point is, Jimin is his own person he can make his own decisions." Taehyung says. "If he wants to go to the club and get shit faced that's okay and if he wants to stay at home and cry for his ex that is also okay."
"I haven't cried for Evelyn." I say after a little. "Not even once."
"You used to cry over her when you fought." Sam mutters.
"He's probably used to it now." Dylan says.
"Look, I get that we don't fit together okay?" I continue. "But it's hard to move on when you've had so much history with that person."
"At least you understand that you make a toxic couple." Sam says. "That's something."
"I need some time. I really need to focus on myself for a change because all I've been doing while I was with Evelyn was trying so fucking hard to maintain our relationship. I cast my needs and my happiness aside for the safety of being together. I thought I needed her to be happy, but I was wrong. If I can't be happy with myself, or make my own life decisions I will be miserable. "
"Good for you Jimin." Taehyung smiles.
"About time." Dylan sighs. "I'm glad you're getting back on your feet again."
"Yeah," I murmur.
"You know what you need J?" Sam inquires and before I answer he goes for it. "You need a good stress reliever."
"I'm not stressed." I say.
"You're telling me that now but when I give you this fucking awesome gift you will thank me for fucking ever." Sam says and fishes for his cell in his jacket pocket.
"What are you doing?" I ask.
"I'm gonna close an appointment with my massage therapist." Sam says. "She's so good at what she's doing-her hands are working magic."
"Sam, I don't even want to get a massage." I say.
"Stop talking." Sam snaps. "I'm texting her now."
"So your plan is to take me to a spa?" I inquire.
"No, who has time for a spa," Sam mumbles totally immersed in his text messages.
"I don't feel comfortable having a stranger touching me." I start.
"You sound like a pussy." Sam chimes.
"Fuck off."
"I'm doing you a favor dick." Sam snaps. "So shut it. Actually don't shut it. Are you availiable Thursday at eight?"
He's not gonna stop until he gets his way so I finally give in. "Fine."
"Super. Eight it is at my place." Sam says. "You can thank me after she gives you the time of your life."
"Who is this woman anyway?" I ask.
"She's an independent masseuse." Sam says. "Pretty cheap if I'm being honest. Fifty bucks an hour. My treat."
"Sure whatever." At least I'm not paying for it. "It better be good."
"Oh, it will." Sam says. "You'll get a boner from how good she is."
"Are you sure it's a massage you're talking about?" Taehyung asks.
"You're all missing out my dudes." Sam says. "I've offered to close an appointment for you before but if you think that sparing an hour of your time for a moment of tranquility and relaxation is hurting your male pride then what can I tell you? You're losers."
"You've probably screwed the girl for all we know." Dylan says.
"I wish." Sam answers and I look at him weirdly. "When you see her too you'll want to fuck her too. Especially when she starts massaging your back. I don't know if blondes are your type but it sure isn't ginger so you're good to go."
"You're crazy." I say.
"You can thank me later J."
i decided to add some other characters non related to kpop cause come on, this story takes place in Oregon so yeah.. i hope you like em. i know i do.
~unedited~cause I'm lazy and i love you