Ashton's P.O.V
I don't understand. Why is my son in this situation. Why did this have to fucking happen to us? I mean, yeah he is still alive but what if another tumor comes back and they can't fix it this time. I only met the little guy like two months ago, and I am not ready to say goodbye to him yet. I will never be ready to say goodbye.
It's been three weeks since Lucas's sugery, and we have all been a total wreck without him around the house. We go to the studio and try and get done what we need to but, Allie and I always have our minds somewhere else. We are always focusing on him instead of our music.
I think the boys are the same way. We all mess up, and we can focus on one topic long enough to write a song. If we do, Allie or i end up crying because something will make us think about what's going on with Lucas right now.
If we sing about heartbreak, I think about how I would feel if I lost him.
If we sing about the past, I think about what the first few months of his life were like since I wasn't there for them.
If we sing about the future, I think about how it'll be without him if he would die on us.
But can you really blame me?
"Ash, what are you thinking about?" I heard Luke say and I turned to look at him. I lket out a sigh realizing I was completely zoning out of the conversation the boys and I were having.
"I keep thinking about Lucas. What happenes if he dies Luke?" I asked him. Luke's face dropped and a frown appeared. I put my head in my hands and let out another frustrated sigh.
"I can't believe this is happen ing to us. Lucas was perfectly fine one day and then the next thi shappened to him? How the hell did we not realize anything wrong? A tumor doesn't just show up in the blink of an eye." I babbled. Luke moved over and sat next to me, Mikey and Calum across from us.
"Mate he'll be fine. I believe in the little guy." Luke said.
"How can you possibly believe in him Luke? The doctor's told us he was supposed to wake up three days after the surgery. It's been three weeks and still nothing? How is that at all postive? There is obviously something wrong with that, and it is starting to make me think he won't wake up." I said, my words coming out so fast and tears coming to brim my eyes, once again.
"Ashton, the doctorhas said he will be fine and that the surgery was a success." Calum said.
"That only means they got the fucking tumor out Cal. That doesn't guarentee he'll live." I snapped, not meaning too.
"Mate you gotta calm down. I knw he's your son and all but Allie isn't acting like this." Mikey informed all of us. And that started to make me wonder where Allie even was. She went for a walk and never came back last night.
"Do any of you even know where she is? I haven't seen her all morning." I said.
"I haven't either. I'm gonna call her." Luke said before exiting the room and then all these thoughts flooded through my mind about losing both people whpo mean everything to me in the world. I gotta get these thought out of my head, they are making me go insane.
Luke's P.O.V
As soon as we brought up the topic of none of us knowing where Allie was, my brotherly instincts kicked in. You know that thing called twin telepathy? Well it exists. I have a feeling something bad happened that involves her.
I pulled out my phone as I walked out to the front stoop of the house and dialed her number. It started ringing so luckily her phone is on. It rang three times before she picked up.
"Lukey?" She asked, sounding confussed.
"Allie where on earth are you? You left last night and never came back. Are you alright?" I started to ask her, and then I heard her sniffling from the other end, answering my question for me.
"Luke can you come to the hospital don't tell the boys, just get here as quick as you can." She said and I heard more sniffles and whispers in the background.
"I'll be right there." I said and then she hung up the phone Well shit, I ran down to the car Ash rented and I don't even care that I don't have my license. I know how to drive, so I will and whatever happens, happens. My sister obviously needs me so I am not going to let her down.
I started speeding down the street. I am so lucky I didn't get pulled over, that would have been super bad if I got got speeding, plus driving without a license. I would be in deep shit.
I ran through the hospital doors to see Allie sitting in the waiting room. She has her head in her knees and she is sitting in the corner, not even on a chair. People are giving her weird looks. Like chill guys her son is in very bad shape at the moment.
"Allie? Sis, what's going on?" I asked hert and she looked up at me. Her eyes were red and puffy and I didn't like seeing her that way. It's awful. She looks so vulnerable, and that makes me want to cry.
"Are you Luke?" A women asked. I nodded and she came over to grab my wrist and pull me with her before I could even ask who she was. She was deffinately a doctor of some sort, but I have no clue what her deal is.
"Alright Luke, your sister had been sat like that since last night. We called her in here about your nephew Lucas." She said. I nodded, well now I see why she didn't actually tell us where she was going.
"The poor little guy should have woken up weeks ago, and we hate to tell you this but Lucas has cancer, and we though we could get it out if we had the tumor in his brain removed but we just can't do it. It is more places then we thought. He's to young and weak to fight any sort of battle against it. We want to take him off of his life support, because he will pass in his sleep that way and it won't be painful for him. Where as if we wait til he wakes up and let him go on his own he'd live a little longer but he will be in pain until he passes away. It won't be painful all the time but, he'll have his days. He would live until he's maybe five to ten years of age you let it go. We told all this to your sister and she never gave us an answer on what to do, so we waited til we could talk to her again, but by then she told us you were on your way and we had to talk to you about it. So it's up to you now I guess." The women explained, my jaw falling basically to the floor. Tears escaperd my eyes, and I could see paparrazzii flashes though the window and I didn't even care anymore.
"I'll speak tyo Lucas's father, and then call an let you know what to do." I said and she nodded. I walked away from her and passed Allie. I couldn't even dream of what to say to her right now. I feel broken, imagine her seeing as she is his mother. I'm just Uncle Luke. She's Mummy.
I got in the car and drove back to the house, having some difficulty since I can't see very well cause of the tears, but I manage.
I get out of the car and see Calum and Mikey on the front stoop waiting for me.
"Where's Ash?" I asked them.
"He's in the shower. He went up there about twenty minutes ago. He should be done soon." Calum answered.
"Mate why are you crying, and why did you have Ash's car. What the hell is going on?" Mikey asked. I shook my head and walked passed them. I walked to the kitchen and grabbed a beer from the fridge.
"Oh no you don't. Not until you tell us what's wrong." Calum answered.
"I don't really wanna talk about it." I said and opened the beer and chugged half of it down before I stop to breathe. Mikey and Calum look at me shocked and I sigh setting it down and I sit on the floor with my legs up to my chest , like how Allie was when I walked in and saw her.
"Luke whatever it is, you have to tell us. We know Allie is your sister but we care about her too. Maybe not as much as you and Ashton but we care about her. We care about Lucas." Mikey said and he squatted down infront of me.
"I just heard probably the worst news in the world." I answered
"What is it Mate?" Cal asked getting down like Mikey is.
"My nephew has fucking cancer." I said, and it wasn't until after I said it that I noticed the third figure hovering around in the background. Ashton stepped forward and sat like the others infront of me.
"What do you mean Luke?" Ashton asked, his face as broken as Allie's was.
"Lucas has cancer Ash, they say he shou;ld live to anywhere between five and ten, but he'll have days where he is in really bad pain, unless we can pull the plug on him now. " I explained. Ashton's face dropped.
"Either way he's gonna die right?" Ashton asked. I nodded my head and he fell back onto his back on the floor.
I thought Allie looked broken after she had cried for hours. I under estimated the word.
Ashton, in a matter of seconds looked worse.
Not broken.
Not busted.
Not shattered.
He looked dead.
Completely dead
And I made him look like that by my news.