OMNISCIENT
October 3rd.
After two months of fighting for her life, Nina couldn't hold on any longer. August made sure he was in her room every day talking with her.
He put on a brave face and only broke down when he was in his home alone.
She had lost too much blood, the doctors said she died on the operating table but they were able to get her back.. that's what the breathing machine was for.
But she couldn't hold on and August didn't think she deserved to suffer like that. If she had to go and if that's what God wanted he wouldn't argue.
It hurt him to his core, it did. He shut down and didn't want to be bothered by anyone.
He asked Tanya to live on Campus, but she couldn't do it even if she wanted to. She knew he needed her and she was gonna be there even if he tried to pretend like everything was okay.
She never seen him so quiet and so out of element before. It made her nervous, word is Wilma did set it up and they fled before August and Caine even got a chance to retaliate.
They had to come back and if not August would personally go looking for them.
The crazy thing is that the night Nina was shot, she randomly sent a text to August saying "Just wanted to say I love you big head."
He didn't think anything of it cuz that's how they were, they always made sure each other knew how much they loved one another.
Nina was a mini him and he would've gave the world to her if he could've. If it could've been him instead of her, he would trade places with her in a heart beat.
Her passing hit everyone differently.. she had an amazing impact on everyone, leaving everyone with their own story to tell about her.
That's what they did during the funeral, each person shared their story about her, very emotional and beautifully spoken.
August wore shades and Nina' favorite beanie. She always picked out his hats but this one in particular he chose and she always found any reason to wear it.
Now he was wearing it for her..
August, Tanya, Caine and Ron sat in the front, Ariel, Kandy, a few school friends and some of their cousins filled up the rest of the seats in the church.
August didn't even have it in him to fight with Ron when he showed up at his house after hearing about the incident on the news.
He gave his condolences then they hashed out their issues, it wouldn't go back to how it used to, but August respected him for paying his respects.
He loved Nina like she was his sister, so he wouldn't stop him from wanting to say his final goodbye.
Tanya didn't wanna talk to him and he didn't blame her, he just hoped she forgave him..
They all sat and listened to the preacher, but nobody was really paying attention everyone was deep in thought.
It wasn't real.. it couldn't be.
Tanya looked over at August who was doing his best at keeping it together, her heart ached afor him.
She knew how much he adored his little sister, seeing him trying his best not to go crazy was hurting her in the worst way.
She quickly wiped a stray tear away then tried to focus back on the Preacher.
"We have a best friend of Nina's that's going to sing one of her favorite songs." He called as he looked towards Tanya.
She smiled weakly then stood up smoothing down her dress. She kept a brave face as she approach the alter, he helped her up and then hugged her.
She almost broke down in his arms, but she knew she had to keep it together. "God makes no mistakes." He told her as he pulled from the hug and gently covered her forehead in oil.
She took a few breaths and scanned the Church, August made sure that they had a small ceremony and only had people that he knew actually knew and cared about his sister.
"Father can you hear me? We need your love today.. I know that you are listening, you hear me everyday.." she sang smoothly as the Preacher motioned for everyone to stand.
August, Caine and Ron lifted the casket and slowly walked down the aisle with Tanya singing effortlessly.
"Father please hear us, and we will be okay.. Father we n-need you.." her voice cracked, she paused and tried to keep it together.
"Father can you hear me? I'm calling on your name. Not Buddha nor Muhammad, but it's Jesus we cry out loud. Father just forgive us! Hear us when we say!"
She continued, her voice caused chills to run down everyone's back. You could hear the pain in her voice.
As they made it outside you could still hear her singing. Once they got to the burial site, they all took their time placing her casket down.
August stepped back but made sure he stayed close to it.
Tanya was on the last verse but couldn't go anymore, it was really hitting her and there was nothing she could do about it.
She met everyone else outside and stood off in a distance. She didn't want anyone to say anything to her, at least not yet, it was too soon.
"Job chapter seventeen verses six through fifteen says; God has made me a byword to everyone, a man in whose face people spit. My eyes have grown dim with grief; my whole frame is but a shadow. The upright are appalled at this, the innocent are aroused against the ungodly. Nevertheless, the righteous will hold to their ways, and those with clean hands will grow stronger. "But come on, all of you, try again! I will not find a wise man among you. My days have passed, my plans are shattered. Yet the desires of my heart turn night into day; in the face of the darkness light is near. If the only home I hope for is the grave, if I spread out my bed in the realm of darkness, if I say to corruption, 'You are my father,' and to the worm, 'My mother' or 'My sister,' where then is my hope— who can see any hope for me?"
The Preacher quoted.
"John chapter 14 verses one through four reads, "Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me. My Father's house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. You know the way to the place where I am going."
He paused and looked around at everyone.
"Therefore don't leave here today with regrets or any anger. But if you leave here sad, understand that soon it will be replaced with happiness from the Lord. "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. Jesus says in the 27th verse in John. Love thy Lord with all your heart and with all your might and with all your soul, for through the darkness there comes lights.."
He preached as a few eyes became glossy.
"Leave here on this day happy, that's what dear Nina would have wanted. Know that it's in Gods control and he's able. Some of you may not understand or may be upset with him.."
He looked in August direction, "And that's okay, he understands and he still loves you. He needed his angel back, she paid her dues down here and it was time for her to go on home. Revenge is not sweet and it's definitely not the answer. God always has the final say, you may feel like you've lost and that the devil won, but he hasn't. Remember the wicked always reap what they sow, what you do in the dark shall come into the light. Leave it up to God and leave your burdens to him. May this precious angel rest peacefully in peace... Amen."
He finished, slowly everyone took turns to walk up to the casket and touch it and say their final goodbyes.
August of course waited to go last, he was selfish when it came to her, but that was okay.
She was his world, his little peace of headache and she was taken over some bull shit.
"I love you Ni.. always and forever." He mumbled as he bent down and kissed the casket then ran his hand over it before walking away just as it was being lowered slowly.
Tanya was able to finish singing and as she was finishing everyone was leaving one by one, two by two.
August stayed back of course, just wanting time with her, he wish he would've made her stay home.
But she wanted to go out, he should've said no.
"Aug?" Tanya called softly as she approached him. "I'm good ma." He tried to convince himself.
"No you're not.. I can tell." She said standing by him. He looked at the head stone as a few tears slid from under his shades.
"She's always gonna be here." She spoke softly as she touched his heart. "We won't forget about her, I won't let you." She cried as he pulled her into him closely.
She couldn't hear, but the way his shoulders bounced up and down, she knew he finally broke.
"I love you and I'm sorry, it wasn't fair." She said as she sniffled rubbing his back. "I got you August, I promise.."
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Mis • Used
To mistreat or abuse.
After being beat on for 12 plus years, by the only man in her life that she thought was supposed to take care of her and protect her, she finally found her strength to leave.
That was with the help of people who loved her more than she knew, she was no longer the weak, little Tanya, she was a fighter, an angel, yes she was broken, but she was done with being being mistreated, talked down upon.
With her biggest threat out of her life permanently, she no longer had to fear of being misused and abused any longer.. she was happy, but with the lost of her best friend, how would things be between her and the guy she was growing in love with day by day?
Things change feelings change right?
I wonder how the death of a loved one can change how a few people act or feel about each other.
When it's all said and done.. love conquers all...
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