Chapter 31
"Alright Ms. Gosling, your officially discharged." the doctor grumbled. He twirled in his chair giving me a few papers to sign and a prescription for a me medication that would help boost my immune system.
Whatever that meant.
I hopped off the examination table and made my way to the door, Emma was waiting for me with my jacket. She smiled walking towards me and hugging me, I hugged back. She let go giving me my jacket. I slipped into the sleeves and zipped it closed before going to the reception's desk and asking about Logan. The nurse smiled and nodded saying he was located in room 234 on the second floor. I was nervous it'd been several weeks since I'd last seen him and Mia and Ryan while we're at it. I missed my children dearly, all I wanted was to scoop them into my arms and never let them go. Ever.
That would all happen soon.
The plaque of room 234 glistened as I turned the handle and pushed the heavy wooden door. There he lay in his bed. A feeling of déjà vu hit me seeing him like this, but this it was different. This time he was awake and vigilant to his surroundings. He wasn't in coma nor was he oblivious to who I was. He knew who I was and I knew exactly who he was.
He was Logan Henderson, the boy I dreamed ever since BTR started. Now he was mine and I was his, nothing could ever beat that. Not the entire money the world could possibly offer me in exchange. Not even the death threats I received from his million worldwide fans he had. Because of course he belonged to his fans, but emotionally he belonged to me.
Only.
His smile made me weak at the knees making them into jelly, his white straight teeth and dimples made me swoon. I held my cool as I walked over to his side, I planted a small but meaningful peck on his lips. I looked into his dark chocolate eyes and removed the eyelash that was in the way. "How are you feeling?"
"Better now that you're here. Thought I'd go crazy here all alone, you're free?" he made a face that made me squeal.
"Yeah." I replied cooly, I squared my shoulders, but kept a firm grip around his hand. "I'm going to see the kids. It's been an eternity now, I would probably bet that Ryan has forgotten who his mother is."
Even his chuckle made me go crazy like the first time I heard it. "No, it'd be impossible to forget some one as beautiful as you."
I blushed.
"Logan I need to tell you something." I said finally gaining control of the situation.
"Well? What is it? You aren't leaving me again are you?" His raised eyebrow making me laugh, I shook my head no as I kissed him. Our lips meshed together expertly as his hand may its way behind my neck pulling me closer. My brain begged for air, but I ignored it. Finally we broke off and our foreheads were against each other.
"Never again." I muttered kissing him once more. "It just something I need to do somewhere."
He sat up straight and I took a seat next to him. "Where?"
"The Los Angeles Police Department."
***
I knew that coming here would come and bite me in the ass, Logan had begged and pleaded me not to come here. Some of the officers had done a very profound inspection of my purse and made me leave it at the front desk. I walked through three gates and a metal detector that made me take off my brown leather belt.
I walked through a heavy metal door and found a bunch of tables arranged and some of its residents with family members.
"You've got thirty minutes." A gruff voice barked, an officer had lead me here and was to remain nearby but with strict orders to not listen to our conversation. I nodded my response but was intimidated by his height and bulkiness. Some people were walking freak shows.
I looked through the rows of tables trying to find that dirty blonde head of hair. I needed to ask him so many things, I needed to tell him so many things.
At the last left corner table he sat alone in a dark gray suit. His hands rested on the table, a pair of handcuffs around them. I took out the bright yellow plastic chair from under and took a seat. He looked up as I noticed how a long and wide scar had decorated his right cheek, probably from a fight with a cell mate. His eyes, icy blue and cold, carrying the weight of the world.
"Jackie, it's great to see you." he said in a husky voice, I smiled weakly but only nodded. "It was a surprise when I was told who it was."
"I came..- I came to talk to you." It came out weak. He mouth turned into a small but visible smirk, that made my blood burn a bit.
"Is that so, are you here to beg me to take you back? That Logan wasn't the man you thought he was? How predictable of a pretty boy."
"Don't flatter yourself Christopher. Don't think so much of yourself, Logan is the man I thought he was and more. What'd you expect? That a silly little threat was going to pry us apart? Even so.. how was it that you were going to even win me back? By your pathetic little threats against my kids, my family. You're surely delusional." His silence made me bold but sure it scared me what he had to say after my speech of scrutiny was over.
"I know you well. Don't forget that, I loved you Chris. I really did, you were gone overseas and I thought that I'd never see you, alive at least. But you came back, I was happy but apparently it wasn't enough for you. You decided to cheat on me with Eliza or Lisa, or whatever her name was. I'll never understand why, but in reality it doesn't matter. Because I have him." He played with his hands and eyed me carefully.
"You just don't understand my reasons. To the world I seem like a psychotic murderer. All I wanted was you, you were the only girl who showed restraints against me. With a flick of my wrists I had all the women I wanted and even those I didn't. But you were a challenge that I accepted. And when that pretty boy came into the picture it made me desire you even more. That's why I put everything out and my head hatched the plan to pull you apart with Chelsea. But she just had fall in love with me." His grin of malice gave me a chill that ran up and down my back.
"You're unbelievable." I spat.
"Is that so? I would assume you'd say that right after one night you and I together. Then your words would have all the backup they needed."
I shook my head in disbelief. "I just want to know who it is that is giving you the information about us. Yes, I know you're spying on us. The truth of the matter is that you can't get Logan away from me. I know everything. Before the transfusion, and let me tell you you're the most despicable person I've ever met." The words poured out of my mouth with no hesitation. My blood boiled and burned with such intensity it could've burned the table where we were at.
"So you know? It doesn't surprise me really, pretty boy never really knew how to keep a promise." His voice -that I once found irresistible- taunted me, almost begging me tear him into shreds that instant, and if wasn't for the guards around us I probably would have.
"He kept it, I was the one who broke it because I was the one who started being a bitch to him. I was the one who threw him out of my home. But your little pitiful plan was only but to fail. So I want and I demand for you tell me who's working for you. Who's giving you information about our daily lives?" I slammed my hand onto the cold hard table gaining scowls from other people but I couldn't have cared less for them. He seemed surprised at my new found voice, after all I'd always been the quiet one.
"Lets just say he's been a great use for me, but to bad he such a warm hearted. He melts at the first sight of attraction, that's weakness, something I can not work with. Of course with the warning I gave him he should know whats best for him." His wry smirk made me want to pounce and tear his icy blue eyes from their sockets.
"You're a monster!" I snarled, Chris chuckled drumming his fingers on the surface.
"Oh now I'm the monster? The irony of it all, when in reality the real monster behind all this has been in your life plenty of times. And yet you have the audacity to blame me. Now who's pathetic?"
I could feel my nostrils flaring with fury. Was he making fun of me? He smirked, probably at the sight on my bulging vein on my temple, his lips soon became a thin line as he stared into space. "Remember how we first met?"
"What does that have to do with anything?" I asked curiously.
"I came back from my first mission, my parents welcomed me with a surprise party. Your parents were invited as well and they brought you along with your sisters. As I walked out to the backyard I spotted you and you instantly mesmerized me. With that sweet melodious voice you carried, and that yellow summer dress. My mission was to make you mine, and I did for some time." His hooded eyes gave me the answer I craved, he never saw me with love. I was a trophy he wanted to show off to the world.
Bastard.
I stood up from my chair and straightened my posture. "I have never in my life felt such hatred for a human being such as I feel towards you."
I began to walk away.
"You'd be surprised at how much you'd hate the person who is helping me. But fine do as you please, I'm done. In the end the outcome of all of the damage will be greater than I'd ever imagine. And to top it all off my hands will remain clean." he called out. My teeth clenched and so did my fists as it took all my willpower not to go back and slap him senseless.
The nerve of some people.
The only way my mood had enlightened was seeing for the first time my kids. Mia squealed as she ran towards me, I crouched down to pick her up. Derek came into view with Ryan, as soon as he saw me he began smiling.
I kissed Derek's cheek in greeting as he exchanged Ryan for Mia. He whispered in my ear seconds later. "There's someone here to see you."
He jerked his head towards the kitchen and I handed Ryan over to Suzy -a nanny the guys had called in durning my stay at the hospital. I walked calmly towards the kitchen to find her there sitting on a stool chair. Demi.
"Hey."
"I'm glad to see you're okay, but I came to set stuff straight." The confidence she brought to the table stunned me, all I did was nod and take a seat before her.
"Of course, speak what you will."
"I just came from the hospital, what Logan and I had is over. I realize that not even as fake relationship between us could've of a wedge between the unconditional love you guys have for each other. That's something I truly admire. But if there's something I despise it's weakness, something that you've demonstrated from the start." My eyebrows raised but I remained quiet. I'd have my own moment to reply back. "If you knew from the start what Logan was doing, why couldn't have you spoken up? Why did you have to do your part and make him feel like a worthless person? You should've left it how it was supposed to be, placing him in command. He knows what he's doing."
I cocked my head to the side showing my disinterest in her words. "Are you finished?"
She nodded.
I let out a breath of air, crossing both my legs and arms my lips turning up into a smirk. "Please do tell me, have you ever been in love?"
Just like Chris she remained quiet, her brown eyes darkened with my question. I didn't give a monkey's ass if she was Demi fucking Lovato. She was in my home and not until hell freezes over was I going to allow her to come and patronize me.
"Not until you have experienced the feeling of love will you understand what it is to sacrifice for someone else's well being. Even if it means that they are going to hurt, sometimes pain is good, it definitely beats the hell out of being dead. Don't you think?" She nodded, closing her eyes briefly, she mirrored my actions with her arms and legs as I proceeded. "So unless you know what I've been through don't walk through that door and give me advice as to how I should live my life, and how I should do things. I don't care if you're Logan's friend that's his business, but towards me you refrain what comes out of your red stained mouth. Understood?"
Her jaw went rigid and she sat up straight, she had nothing left to say. The only thing she could do was leave, and that's exactly what she did.
Good.
Ryan was taking his afternoon nap and Mia was upstairs with her Suzy, as to where I found out she took a great liking and started looking at her like a grandmother. Derek came into the kitchen clapping his hands. "Bravo my dear, you've finally grown a pair."
I rolled my eyes and pushed him slightly. "I will no longer be pushed around. It's time to finally stand up for myself, if I don't who will?"
His arm snaked around my shoulders pulling me close to his side, leaning his side of his head against mine. "You know you'll always have me."
"I know, but you're not always going be here are you?" I teased, his body tensed.
"Jackie I'm afraid I have something to tell you. It's about Katie."
***
Just as Derek had predicted, Katie walked towards me, her eyes bloodshot and looking very disoriented. The airport was very lonely, only a few people walked to and fro it's grand space. Her luggage dropped to the floor as she hugged me tightly as if I was her lifeline. She began sobbing uncontrollably and I began speaking. "What happened? Why is Toby not with you?"
She opted to not talk about out the situation until we got home, somewhere more private. Derek unloaded all her suitcases from the cars trunk and placed them in the guest room where Katie would be staying. She didn't speak, she didn't eat, all she did was just sleep. I blamed it on jet lag, little did I really know what had been happening in London.
"I'm truly sorry, I knew I should've called you guys more often. I knew I should've visited more frequently, shit- I'm such a terrible person." I apologized for the millionth time whilst looking at my side view mirror checking it if had a chance to pass on to the right lane. "So much for being best friends, right?"
Katie sniffled, shaking her head no giving me a weak, forceful smile. "S'not your fault Jackie. You had your own problems. But I just came to a point where I just couldn't take it anymore. I just really needed to get out of there."
My hand let go of the steering wheel as I placed my small hand on her shoulder giving her comfort. "It'll be alright. Try to get some sleep when we get home. Then you can tell me everything, and why Toby isn't here. With you."
~~~~~
Song : Demons - Imagine Dragons
I re-reread absolutely every single chapter of both books and they were terrible. I had lost count of so many typos and mistakes. I might re-edit them all and you'll probably have to re-read them again if you don't mind. But that'll be much later. So don't panic. For now!
P.S. I have like a major lesbi-crush on Demi Lovato so absolutely NO hate on her. She is probably my idol, no fucking joke!