28 - Stupid

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Chapter 28

I was mad, enraged I could say. Shouldn't a twenty three year old know how to take care of himself? Didn't he know that without proper care he could severely damage his wound? More than it already was.

I took him back where the campfire was set. Sitting him down on a log that was near the river. Once more I tried my best to clean up as much blood as I could. Before it could crust in his well defined skin.

He groaned in pain as I neared the gash, but I didn't want to touch it. It looked grotesque, but I couldn't leave him to suffer.

I loved him to much for that.

Without the proper know how of survival out in the wilderness I was somewhat doomed. But I think that the love I had for him made me do a makeshift bandage.

"Jackie, I just want to thank you. For everything." he whimpered, I half smiled. The corner of my mouth twitched a little, at least I knew he was grateful.

"It's not a big deal, hopefully you would've done the same for me." I said, he nodded somewhat content with my answer.

"Absolutely."

I finished cleaning him up again, this time demanding him to stay where he was. I was not looking forward to his injury far worse than it already was.

I caught myself kissing his right cheek, but soon he was kissing me.

My world stopped.

I kissed back, his lips the sweetness taste of all. The palm of my hand found his neck and all inhibitions were lost in me. It all led to me finally snapping. I pulled away quick leaving him confused.

I shot up, getting up on my feet and wiping my lips. I could feel them swelling up, he kissed hard.

"No, this isn't right. Demi's going to kill us." I said. Logan's expression was blank. I believe that for an instant he had forgotten everything.

"Right, as well with Derek." he implied.

"Derek and I aren't anything." I clarified.

"You aren't?"

"No, he's just a really good friend." I replied.

"Right, a really good friend that you almost kiss." he mocked. My eyes slit, he must've noticed the nerve on my temple bulge because he swallowed nervously.

"At least I'm not swearing my love for you only to have hours later be found kissing someone." I snapped.

"What are you talking about?" he asked defensively.

"Remember Kendall's wedding? On the balcony where you pleaded me to swear my love for you? Just to see you next day on the news making out with her?" I asked, he remained quiet. "I never felt more stupid in my life. I felt used, I felt humiliated. But what got me back was my pride. The fact that I didn't confess anything to you. That's what kept me going."

"Jackie.."

"No, I don't want to hear you're sorry! I don't want your pity. I'm just glad the I didn't bow down to your plea." I said interrupting him, his eyes widened. I had never be outspoken, that surprised him. And I had Derek to thank for that.

"You really think that I was going to apologize?" he asked quietly. I turned to look at him as he struggled to stand up. I crossed my arms neglecting the idea of helping him.

"What if I told you I still love you?" he said as he stood up straight.

"Then you're down right stupid to feel anything for me. After I put you through so much shit." I spat, he winced. "You shouldn't love me, you should despise me. And you should love her."

"But I don't. And you know that." he replied. I felt like crying that instant.

"I just want to know why?" I asked.

"Why what?" he asked really confused.

"Why couldn't you go through with what Chris asked you to do? To leave me."

His eyes widened, his Adam's apple bobbed up and down his throat.

"How do you know?"

I, Jackie, had finally hit the jackpot.

~~~~~

I'm aware of Logan's 24th birthday. Keep in mind the story setting is in March-April 2013.

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