Hanni was always someone to get attached to her kids. She spent a good chunk of her money on supplies and books, and the little prize bucket that sat near her desk simply because she loved her class too much. All thirty of them, even if they had a range in closeness. Snack time was probably her favorite time of the day, the kids would play and entertain themselves while she could either relax and watch them for fifteen minutes or prepare whatever she needed for the rest of the class. She got attached to how they tried really hard to do well on a quiz, or frustrated because they couldn't figure something out. It didn't pay much, but it was incredibly rewarding.
No one ever told her how nerve-racking the job could be. There was one time when Jungkook broke his arm on the monkey bars outside and Hanni thought she was going to die of nerves. She sat and waited with him until the paramedics came, trying to calm him down and divert his attention. But the scariest time in her career was when Hong Eunchae walked into class one morning, a large bruise covering her right eye, jumping at every noise, completely petrified. She made her stay for lunch, gently probing on how she got that bruise, why she wasn't feeling well, what was bothering her. Eunchae wouldn't say. Knowing she wouldn't get any answers she let her go back to class, only for Eunchae to lash out on one of the boys in her group. Apparently, he took her pencil, and Eunchae cussed him out so viciously and angrily the entire class went silent. Hanni made a report to family services that night, nothing happened. Family day was worse. Truth be told, she wasn't really expecting her mother to show up, but she still hoped. Eunchae seemed to share her sentiment, sadly glancing over at the door the entire day like she was waiting for someone. Halfway through Hanni and Eunchae had to camp out in their classroom as everyone else had fun outside, Eunchae quietly crying, scared and sad. For once, Hanni had no idea what to do. On her way to her car that afternoon, longing to get home and try to figure out what she should do, she saw Eunchae just standing there, staring out at the parking lot. After a bit of light questioning, Eunchae said she was waiting for her mom. Hanni drove her home that day, catching a glimpse of Hong Eunjung. She made her second report that night.
Things seemed to get better since then. Eunchae finally came to school dressed in weather appropriate clothing. She brought lunch to school, granted it was just takeout leftovers it still fed her, her grades started improving. Hanni had never felt more relieved in her life. Eunchae started making more friends too, branching off to become friends with Yeri, Sooyoung, and Lucas. She was so energetic and happy, it feels like the past week had been a ninety-degree turn, not completely back to the starting line, but progress was hindered a bit.
"I just don't think that Santa is real." Yeri huffed, slumping back into her seat as Sooyoung and Lucas laughed, the idea of the man not being real completely ridiculous.
Sooyoung slipped more of her popcorn into her mouth, "You're not going to get presents then."
"What? No! I believe!"
Funnily enough, Eunchae and Kyujin just watched it all go down. Eunchae had her head laying on the desk as she had for most of the class, trying to fight off sleep as Kyujin ate her favorite gummy snack. Without a doubt, Kyujin would come in every day and offer Eunchae a few pieces, which may be just out of habit at this point. Eunchae just lazily opened her mouth, letting Kyujin plop it in. Those two were always quite amusing, attached to the hip since day one. Hanni knew for a fact, Eunchae hated those gummies that Kyujin would offer her, her nose always wrinkled up in disgust but she chewed and swallowed anyways, telling Kyujin that they were good and Kyujin would smile and offer her another because she thought it made Eunchae as happy as it made her. Before Eunchae was removed Kyujin used to split her lunch with Eunchae, perfectly evenly saying that she wasn't hungry and that Eunchae should help her finish it so her moms won't be mad, and it was obvious Eunchae was starving so she'd eat quickly, silently thanking Kyujin.
Today Eunchae seemed to not even be interested in the gummies, or her own snack, cute homemade ants on a log in a pretty green plastic container, opting to lay her head down on the desk instead. She looked completely and utterly exhausted. Eunchae normally had a hard time paying attention in class, but this was something different. Hanni got up from behind her own desk making her way over to Eunchae's, placing her hand on it first as a warning that she was there so the girl wasn't startled, "You feeling okay Eunchae?"
"I'm just sleepy." Eunchae hummed back, pressing her face further into her arms.
"Do you want me to call Ms.Sakura so you can go home and sleep?"
"No!" Yunjin exclaimed, sitting up with heavy sleepy eyes, "I want to get picked up at the end of the day."
"You're falling asleep buddy." Hanni cut in, squatting down to rest her chin on the desk making herself eye level with Eunchae, she seemed to calm down whenever she did that, "Don't you want to just go home and get some sleep?"
"I'm okay."
"Do you feel safe at your new home?" Hanni pressed, "Do you feel scared and you can't sleep or will they not let you sleep?"
"I don't want to sleep alone."
That was probably the first confession Hanni had ever gotten out of the child, and honestly, she had no idea what to do with that information. There was only so much she could do, she couldn't overstep and say, hey how about one of you sleep in the kid's room. She just sighed and stroked the girl's hair, "If you want to take a nap here I won't mind, you can go over to the beanbag chairs. And Kyujin can go over too if she wants and do her work from there. After a silent discussion, Eunchae and Kyujin were heading over to the beanbag chairs, an important feat because they were only reserved for people who could get ten gold stars. Kyujin looked comfy, Eunchae was sprawled out in no time, passed out reaching over to grab Kyujin's hand.
It wasn't much, but it was the best Hanni could do.
***
With a satisfied hum, Sakura tacked the polaroid to her cubicle, smiling as it joined her collection of others. This was her first one with Eunchae, the detective crouched down next to her as they both looked up at the camera and smiled. They took this when Kookeu was on a walk, right after Eunchae and Kazuha were done playing around, almost giving Sakura a heart attack as Kazuha held her upside down. Eunchae loved it, giggling and asking to do it again, Sakura was quick to refuse to cause both her girls to pout.
She sat back in her desk and sighed, looking up at the picture. The last week admittedly had been rough. Eunchae's a good kid, they both knew that, but they definitely underestimated the number of problems she would have. Sure they knew that she would have some issues, it was only natural, but she seemed to have problem after problem and they weren't sure how to solve it. Last night, for example, they were playing Mario Kart, but apparently Sakura had gotten too loud causing the child to burst into tears, hiding behind her penguin. It took fifteen minutes to calm her down. She was stressed and overwhelmed, Sakura tried to remind herself of that.
And Zuha was being so headstrong about certain things. Eunchae couldn't sleep in their bed, Eunchae couldn't just eat whenever she wanted to, she needed to do her homework before she could play. Sakura got it, she was just trying to create some structure in the child's life, a sense of stability. Kazuha's parents were strict, and while Kazuha had expressed that she didn't want to be as strict, for someone like Eunchae maybe having more strict boundaries would help her. It wasn't like she just said these things, she tried to help as well. Kazuha set a certain snack time, and made sure she prepared food that Eunchae would like beforehand, she would sit there and help her try to figure out her homework, the only thing she wouldn't budge on was the bed thing, so Sakura had tried to take care of that. Her neck still ached from laying on the kid's floor for an hour as she waited for her to fall asleep, when she eventually did not even thirty minutes after Sakura had slipped into bed Eunchae was already there asking to climb in. It was just exhausting. Plus how much she asked about Yunjin, she could tell Kazuha was starting to get a little annoyed. It was a new experience for all three of them and they were trying to do the best they could.
The detective took a quick glance over to where Yunjin was sitting, scrolling through something on her computer. She looked tired too. It was starting to unnerve her a bit. Especially after she cried over her house, that was so out of character of her. Yunjin didn't mention it, and neither did Sakura. But she still found herself grabbing two lollipops off her desk, walking over to the younger detective and sat down, holding out a lollipop. Yunjin just looked up at her, irritation written all over her face. She's never as subtle with her emotions as she thinks. The younger just looked back at her computer, "I actually had something to ask you."
This piqued Sakura's interest, "Yeah?"
"Can I borrow Eunchae on saturday? I want to take her to meet Eunha."
What? She didn't even invite Sakura to go with her to see Eunha. "Y-yeah, that's okay."
"Okay."
There was something wrong. Sakura knew it. She could tell. The little bubble of anxiety that was always there when she thought of her friend started to increase, making her palms sweaty. Yunjin has been off lately, and Sakura had a good feeling why. She just wanted to pretend she didn't know. Yunjin let out a loud sigh, looking back up at her, annoyance covering her face, "What is it? I know you came here to ask me something."
"Are you okay?" Sakura found herself blurting out, "I noticed it the other day, something is bothering you. I'm not sure what it is. Are you relapsing, or thinking about it again? I'm just concerned."
"You always fucking dance around the issue," Yunjin spat, standing up now. "Say it."
"Yunjin, I don't know what you mean."
"No, you do." Yunjin snapped, "If you want to rub it in my face that she killed herself then just do it. If you want to rub it in my face that I killed your kid, do it. I'm so sick of you alluding to these things and not following through. Say it. Say what you want to say. Say that you hate me, that you wish I went through with it. Say it Sakura. Say it and stop pretending to care about me just so you can make me miserable."
Where was this coming from? Sakura had no clue, but it was scaring her. Other officers were looking over in their direction, they were concerned as well. Yunjin was never a really open person, but this was the closest they would get to a breakdown from her. The older woman slammed her hand down on the cubicle, "You still blame yourself for that? Yunjin, that was my fault. I ran in there, you couldn't do anything. We talked about this. And she is dead, and you're hurting. It's only been three years, I know you haven't gotten over it. Don't you dare say I wish you went through with it. Do you not understand how scary that was? If Kazuha didn't get there, I-I would have lost you too." Sakura closed her eyes and tried to take a few deep breaths, "Something is bothering you. Is it all this, is it something else? I don't know. As your friend, I wish you would tell me. But as your supervisor, you're a liability right now. I'm going to have to put you on paid leave until you go to employee services and have a psych eval."
That was really the last thing she wanted to do, but if that was what was bothering Yunjin, she needed to make sure she was sound of mind before she even considered having her here. They were friends, but Sakura also held responsibility as her supervisor to ensure not only everyone else's but Yunjin's safety as well. Sakura tapped on the cubicle, having so much more to say before sighing, leaving it alone. "You should go home now, I'll redistribute your cases for now."
"Just because you're mad at me doesn't mean you need to interfere with my job." Yunjin gritted out.
"You're distracted. You could hurt someone or mess up an investigation. This is final." She could only watch as Yunjin grabbed her bag and stormed out, completely pissed. She'd come around, especially if they had to see each other in a few days. She needed a vacation as well, this was the best decision. Sakura sent a quick text to Chaewon, giving her a warning and asking her to take her out to relax. Chaewon sent a thumbs up emoji back. That made her feel a bit more relieved. It was still a bit unnerving though, and even if she knew what was the right thing to do, Sakura didn't know if she was strong enough to do it.