Opal POV
I can feel myself shaking, even whimpering, as I open my eyes, realizing I'm in the hospital's emergency room. My emotions even more disheveled than earlier, although I thought that would be impossible. "Chris..."
"He's in surgery, Opal." I hear Spencer tell me as I attempt to sit up. That's when I realize I'm hooked up to monitors.
"Be careful," Laura says. "They want to keep an eye on you for a bit. You were out a few minutes when you fainted."
"Anything?" I need some type of information on how Chris is doing. Anything, good or bad. I need to know something.
Spencer slowly shakes his head side to side before leaning over, resting his elbows on his knees, wringing his hands together. Laura moves to his side, resting her hand on his shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. In return he lifts his hand to hold hers.
I try to speak more than one word at a time. "What happened?"
"We made the exchange and the rest moved in abruptly, spooking the dealers before we got far enough away."
"But the vest?" I'm struggling with confusion, knowing that they wear bulletproof vests.
Spencer looks up at me with sad eyes. "The vest is bulletproof but not knife proof."
I try to keep my composure long enough to speak a little longer. "So, he was stabbed through the vest?" He nods back at me. "And shot, where?"
"His arm, bicep to be exact."
"Where was he stabbed?" I ask, waiting for more details that I'm sure I won't be able to handle hearing.
"I'm not exactly positive. His breathing seemed short but he was conscious. That's got to be good though," he tries his hardest to assure me.
I suddenly remember the dream I had while I was unconscious. Everything about it felt so real that I am actually experiencing an ache of longing in my chest. Was it a glimpse of our future together? Or a glimpse of what will never be? Both thoughts cloud my mind and cause me to double over, beginning to sob harshly again.
I hear monitors start going off around me as I feel arms wrap around me from behind, pulling me against their chest. "Shh..." Laura attempts to comfort me as I hear a nurse come into the room.
"Miss Lucas, I need you to try and calm down."
Her voice does nothing to me as I continue to cry, grasping onto the arms that are holding my chest tightly. "Opal, please," Laura whispers softly. "He's gonna be okay."
"You don't know that!" I yell out, continuing to cry uncontrollably.
"Miss Lucas, if you don't calm down I will have to sedate you. Your heart rate is dangerously high," the nurse tells me.
"I need him," I stutter out, attempting to catch my breath.
Spencer stands, moving closer to the bed. "Can you get us any type of update on Officer Chris Evans? I think that's the only thing that's going to help her."
"I'll see what I can do." She exits the room as I continue to try and breathe slower, tears still streaming down my face.
I manage to cast a weak glance to Spencer who is still standing by the bedside. "Thank you."
"I need to know just as much as you."
~~~~~
After about twenty minutes the nurse comes back with very little information, but at least it's something. She informs us that they were able to safely remove the bullet without any issues and he shouldn't have any nerve damage in his arm. She said they were still working on his stab wound but would tell us more when she knew.
An hour or so later an ER doctor came by to check on me. I couldn't really speak to him, still in shock over the days events continuing to unfold, along with the dream or vision still playing on repeat in my minds eye. Laura was the one to speak up and ask if he could give me something to help offset my nerves and anxiety.
"I'll write up an order for some valium. It may relax her enough to get some rest while you wait. I do want to keep you here for maybe just a couple more hours. Your BP getting high like that is concerning," he says while tapping into the tablet he's holding.
That's when it dawns on me. "I left without taking my meds this morning."
"Opal," Laura starts to scold me. I narrow my eyes at her, challenging her to continue this line of discussion.
"What do you take?"
"Propranolol," I spit out quickly. "40 mg three times a day."
"That's quite a dose. So you've missed at least 2 doses by now. Alright, we'll get it taken care of." He's about to walk through the door when the nurse meets him, whispering something in his ear, too low for us to hear. I watch as he looks back at me and shakes his head no. He hands off the tablet to her and speaks the orders to her.
I watch as she pulls a medicine cart in from the hallway, unlocking a drawer with her badge and PIN code. She places a couple of pills in one cup, and a couple of others in another before closing the drawer locking it in place. Spencer reaches for the cup and pitcher that I hadn't even noticed sitting next to the bed. He pours water into the cup and passes it to Laura to hand to me. I move myself upright as the nurse hands me the first cup of meds.
"This is the propranolol. We should see your blood pressure relax within thirty minutes."
I take it quickly, holding the empty cup out to her. She replaces it with the valium.
"This is only meant to relax you."
I sigh as I grab the valium from her, knowing that there's no way it will work enough to keep my mind from racing. I swallow it down anyway. "Any other news?"
I see the nurses eyes shift. She must be horrible at playing poker. Spencer notices it too.
"What is it?" he questions.
"I think we should wait a bit longer," she suggests before going back to the medicine cart, preparing to push it back out into the hallway.
"No!" I shout louder than I should have, not caring that I'm in the middle of an ER. "You know something."
"The doctor said I need to wait to give you any other information. Just until the meds kick in," she says holding her hands up in surrender.
"That means it's bad." My eyes shift to Laura who hasn't left my bed, staying beside me for moments such as this I'm sure. I can feel my body beginning to react again as my chest starts to shake.
"Miss Lucas, that's not what it means at all."
Spencer moves closer to the nurse, essentially trying to intimidate her. "If it didn't then you'd say it. What's going on?"
The nurse swallows hard, her eyes shifting from where I lay a heaving mess in the bed, back to Spencer. "As much as I would like to inform you, I can't. I have to follow the doctor's orders." She continues to stand her ground. "I'll be back in about thirty minutes."
I know what's about to happen and I need to stop it before it happens again. I lay back into the bed once again, closing my eyes tightly. "I need my phone." I hear shuffling before Laura nudges my hand with my cell. I open my eyes and begin searching through my music list. It takes a moment before I locate what I'm looking for. I press play and hold it against my chest, letting the lyrics bring me comfort as I remember when Chris sent it to me to listen to.
It was early in the morning when he left from his last trip to Jacksonville after the break in. The trip in which I opened up about everything in my past, letting him in.
Chris- I heard this song come on the radio and had to pull off to share it with you. Reminds me of night before last, when you had the dream. Here's part of the lyrics. I want you to know it's how I feel about you, and what I want to do for you.
Cause I wanna wrap you up
Wanna kiss your lips
I wanna make you feel wanted
And I wanna call you mine
Wanna hold your hand forever
And never let you forget it
Yeah, I wanna make you feel wanted
Anyone can tell you you're pretty
You get that all the time, I know you do
But your beauty's deeper than the make-up
And I wanna show you what I see tonight
The song has brought me comfort when I've been away from him, fighting against my thoughts of my own insecurities of being valued or worthy of affection. I pray it works this time as well as I close my eyes again, listening to the full song on repeat.
By the fourth time through I can feel a difference in my body, from both medications. The monitor shows my blood pressure leveling out closer to normal. My heart rate still a little elevated but not terrible. My muscles don't feel as tense as earlier and my brain just a touch quieter.
At this point all three of us are twiddling our thumbs. Spencer has come and gone a couple of times, checking for updates but also calling the station as well. Laura gave up trying to make small talk and had even moved to a chair.
It wasn't at the thirty minute mark when we were given an update. It was another two hours before we saw someone. My guess is they were watching my stats from the nurses station, afraid we'd demand an update on Chris again.
"Alright Miss Lucas, let's get you out of here," a new nurse says walking in holding a few forms. "Here are your discharge instructions. Get some rest and if you experience any of the things listed then please call your doctor immediately."
"I'm not going home until I see Chris," I tell everyone in the room.
"That's fine. But you'll have to go to the waiting room."
I finally stand up from the bed, grabbing my belongings along with the papers and walk out of the small ER cubicle. Seeing a sign pointing me to the waiting room I move towards that direction but don't make it far before I hear my name. "Miss Lucas?"
I turn to my left seeing a middle aged female doctor speaking to me. Take a few steps towards her she motions for me to follow, Spencer and Laura both on my heels. She stops at a door, opening it to reveal a small room with a couple of seats and a small table. I walk in noticing a box of tissues sitting in the middle of the round table. Preparing myself I grab a couple before taking a seat.
Laura on my right, Spencer on my left, the doctor sits in front of me. "I'm Dr. Sanora. I was Officer Evans surgeon. Normally, I wouldn't be allowed to give you this information but he requested it personally before going into surgery and signed the paperwork for his medical concerns to be shared with you specifically."
I watch her speak, trying my hardest to listen to the words she's saying even though I can feel my ears begin to flood with a fuzziness, my body attempting to cause me to black out again. I slow my breathing once more, reaching to my right and grasp Laura's hand.
"Officer Evans received a gunshot wound to his left arm, upper bicep. It did not exit his arm so we had to go in and remove it. It appears there was no nerve damage as we did bring him out of sedation to check his function before placing him back under." I notice Spencer breathe out a sigh of relief while I still continue to hold my own. I imagine I will continue to hold it until I can see and feel him again.
"Now, the stab wound was a bit more extensive. He was stabbed to the right of his chest. I won't bore you with all of the medical terms or details, but he is stable. I want to keep him here for a few days, just to make sure there's no signs of infection and that his breathing returns to normal."
"When can we see him?" Spencer thankfully speaks up as I'm still afraid to open my mouth, unsure of what may come out.
"He's being moved to the ICU now, so we can keep a closer eye on him. You should be able to see him in about thirty minutes or so, but it is just one person at a time." She stands, moving to the door. "Stay here and a nurse will come direct you to the ICU waiting room." Dr. Sanora looks to Spencer once more, "thank you, officer." He simply nods.
We sit and wait. No one speaks, the air still thick with uncertainty. Or maybe that's just a me thing. Spencer seems to be more relaxed, pulling his phone out to text someone back at the station with the newest update. Laura steps out just long enough to call Lily, both leaving me with my own thoughts.
If he's okay, then what did my dream mean...
~~~~~
"Now, just let me prepare you," the nurse says as he guides us to the ICU waiting room. "Officer Evans is sedated and on oxygen. He'll remain sedated until at least tomorrow morning, just to give his body time to rest and begin to heal on its own." He brings us to a room filled with chairs and a couple of vending machines with a coffee pot off to the side. "I can go ahead and take the first visitor back now."
"You can go," I finally speak, my statement directed to Spencer.
"He would want you, Opal," he responds to my offer. I look back at him, unsure of myself. I'm not positive I can handle going by myself. Reading my mind he adds with a soft smile, "Go, before the valium wears off completely."
"Okay." I move my hand in front of me, urging the nurse to show me where Chris is being kept.
He walks be closer to the nurses station and stops at a room just in front of the desks. I hesitate, chewing on the side of my mouth, my back turned away from his room knowing that the wall that separates us is made of glass. I feel the nurse put his hand on my shoulder. "Take your time," he says before walking off.
I lower my head, closing my eyes and pray for strength to keep myself together. I can't fall apart when the one person who has been holding me together is the one laying in the hospital bed this time. Taking a deep breath I turn and move through the open door, head still pointed to the ground, watching my feet move. I search the room, still not looking up to the bed, until I locate a chair and pull it to the side of the bed, resting in it. My eyes move just enough to see his left hand resting on the edge of the bed, cuts and bruising covering the top of it. My gaze traveling up that arm, noticing his taut bicep wrapped in dressings. Being that close to his upper body I now see his face, spots of blue and purple, a couple of spots showing stitches, a nasal canula of oxygen rests in his nostrils.
My breathing stutters in my chest as I allow myself to cry silently, able to now control the sobs that were so heavily present earlier in the day. I gently pick up his left hand and hold it in mine, bringing my cheek to rest on top of it. My person may not be able to speak to me, or move to hold me, but his presence and touch still brings my the comfort I need in this moment. For the first time today my body begins to fully relax as my tears fall onto his bruised skin.