Chapter 20
A/N:
Very, very long chapter. Hope you guys enjoy <3
I have never told you guys to listen to a song during or after a chapter, but this time these songs are perfect (if you don't know spanish, you won't understand the second one, but I put the parts of it that I loved the most in english for you).
Daylight by Maroon 5
This is our last night but it's late
And I'm trying not to sleep
Cause I know, when I wake, I will have to slip away
And when the daylight comes I'll have to go
But tonight I'm gonna hold you so close
Cause in the daylight we'll be on our own
But tonight I need to hold you so close
Disparo al corazón (Shot to the heart) by Ricky Martin
Meeting you was a shot to the heart
You attacked me with a kiss in cold blood
And I knew
That it was such a deadly wound that it caused..
That this crazy adventurer died
That day began
All this love with just a shot to the heart
I didn’t understand how it happened
With the skill
Of a great sniper
Each of your bullets
Hit me in the soul
Ian
Today we fly over to Vegas for my fight. Tonight, I have to deal with the press. Questions, pictures, facing my opponent. Tomorrow, I fight.
Everybody has been unusually quiet today and being in a private jet, the tension is practically bouncing off the walls.
I know something happened yesterday.
Ava was once again on the verge of tears by the end of the night, Violet was red-faced and fled as soon as she could and Daniel has his face buried on the screen of his phone.
Violet is sitting next to me, looking out of the jet’s window. Ava and Nova are on the seats across the aisle from us and Daniel is at least two rows away.
Something’s definitely off.
“Lovely girl, why don’t you look at me? What’s wrong?” I whisper, reaching out to touch her cheek. She turns her face to me and smiles, but I know it’s not a real smile. No matter how beautiful she may look.
“Nothing’s wrong…I’m just so nervous. I didn’t like to watch you get hurt the last time.” I sigh and pull her against me. There’s something else bothering her. I see it in those amber eyes.
Amber eyes I won’t see for a while….probably never get to see again after this weekend, because I have to leave and I can’t tell her where. I can’t five her an explanation.
“I will be okay.” I say against her hair. She nods.
“We’ll be okay.” She whispers and it makes my chest hurt. She says it like she knows it’s not true.
And it’s not.
“I have to tell you something and maybe I should tell you later when we’re alone, but I can’t keep it from you any longer. I feel horrible about it.” I loosen the arm I have around her when she stiffens, thinking that maybe she’d want to get away from you.
“Yes?” She whispers, head still tucked under my jaw. I have to look into her eyes. I decide to straighten up and stand.
“Come.” I tell her, offering my hand. She looks up at me, like she’d prefer to stay, but puts her hand in mine. Nova and Ava are asleep and I am thankful for this, I don’t want them to get the wrong idea.
I can’t have sex until after my fight. I have been ignoring that rule for an entire month and Carl demanded that I listen to him this once. Therefore, no funny business can happen, not that Violet would want to do anything after what I need to tell her.
I guide her to the private room. In this moment I am glad I bought this jet.
“Sit.” I say, sitting first, wanting her in my lap. She sits and looks at me. “Yesterday, I was at the gym with Carl and Mike…and Becca came by.” Her eyes flash with something. Jealousy? Anger? Fear?
“Becca.” She repeats, soft yet bitter. I nod.
“She came by, to wish me luck and get her closure, I suppose. And she kissed me.” She looks from my eyes to my mouth, then back at my eyes. That’s definitely jealousy in those beautiful eyes.
“Were your hands tied behind your back?” She asks, eying me like I’m prey.
For the first time in my life, I don’t know what to do or say. She looks at me with heat in her eyes, like she wants to devour me, but there’s this bitterness to her hushed words…
“No, they weren’t. She just did it and I let her. Not because I liked it, but because she needed it. Especially after what I told her.” She moves, obligating me to move farther into the bed. She straddles me and blood begins to rush downwards. She’s wearing a dress and it is bunches around her creamy thighs.
She rests her hands on my shoulders and runs them down my chest, her eyes following the path. My cock is instantly hard.
“And what was that?” She says in the same enticing and terrifying voice, letting her hands wander along with her eyes. I close my eyes and try to come up with coherent sentences.
“That you were everything I wanted and needed and I had been lucky to–Jesus, Violet.” I moan as her hips begin to move in circles against me. She looks up, and raises an eyebrow as if saying ‘I’m waiting.’. “That I had been lucky to you because you are everything I could want and need.” My voice is hoarse and raw with lust. Satisfaction make her eyes brighten and she licks her lips, still moving in those small, torturous circles.
“Did you like her mouth on yours?” She asks, her hands traveling up, nails softly digging in. I throw my head back and close my eyes, willing myself to calm down.
“No.” I say quickly. “I only want your mouth on mine.” She places her hands on my neck, forcing me to look at her. Her hands remain in my hair, hanging on tighter than she usually does.
“Are you sure about that? You didn’t like the feeling of her body against yours when she kissed you? You don’t want her?” I take her face in my hands and shake my head.
“I never knew what I wanted until I wanted you. I never knew what I needed until I needed you.” She traces my lips with her hands, a gesture I’ve become rather fond of. She always does it hovering over me after we make love. “If this is what it feels to be completely crazy about someone, I don’t ever want to be sane again.” I whisper, hoping like hell she’ll believe me.
That she’ll believe me after tomorrow when I let her go.
Her lips purse and then she smiles. She looks ready to cry, but pull her face closer to mine and kiss her once. Soft and sweet.
“These lips are mine to kiss.” She whispers, tracing them again as they smile.
“You own all of me, my sweet girl. Everything is yours.” She slams her mouth to mine and kisses me hungrily.
We kiss like we’re drowning and we’re each other’s air. Tongues exploring, teeth biting, lips caressing, we can’t get enough of each other.
She grinds into me, a moan escaping her lips. I curse.
“We can’t, can we?” She says, breathless with her forehead against mine and her hands squeezing my shoulders.
“I can’t.” I tell her and flip her onto her back. “But you can.” She braces herself on her elbows.
“It’s unfair.” She says, as slide her thong down her legs.
“Of course it is. I get to have all the fun.” I say, the inside of her thighs. “Open for me, duchess. My woman wants, my woman gets.”
And she did. Three times.
Violet
Awkward. Uncomfortable. Distressing.
Those are words to sum up how I have been feeling. Ava, Daniel and I don’t say a word the entire time. During the flight, after and now as we check into our hotel, not a word.
Our things were taken up for us, so we walk to our suites.
“We only have a few hours until the interview and weigh-in. We, unfortunately, have to get the food taken to us.” Ian says when we’re all in the hallway of our suites. Nova and Ava share one, Daniel is alone and I am with Ian.
“I’m exhausted. Can we all eat separately, then meet?” Ian nods, kissing his niece on the forehead. She’s evading spending time with me and I get it.
Nova looks ready to drop, so he says nothing.
“Yeah, Ava girl. Go with your brother. Daniel, you can join us if you like.” Ian says, watching Nova and Ava walk into their suite. Daniel smiles and shakes his head.
“I think I would like to explore. Call me when it’s time to go down to the weigh-in. I will be back for that.” He looks at me and kisses my cheek. I let him, but Ian didn’t like it. His hand gets tighter around our intertwined fingers. “You two should spend some time alone.” He says and then goes to his own room.
“Come on. I’ve got to feed you.” Ian says, taking me to our room. It’s amazing; so luxurious it’s almost sinful.
“I am really not that hungry.” I say, longing instead of food a shower. “I want to take a shower first.” He nods, engulfing me in his arms and kissing my forehead.
“Okay, then. That’s what we’ll do first, but you are going to eat something. Want to take a look at the menu or should I just order for the both of us?” He asks me, studying my face.
“You order. I’ll be waiting in the shower.” I rise on my toes and give him a kiss. He smiles down at me and I leave him, entering the bathroom.
I strip quickly and get in the shower and get under the warm spray. I sigh and smooth down my hair.
I should really cut it. It reaches past the middle of my back now.
It has to be only a few seconds later when Ian comes in, stark naked.
Damn Carl and his rules.
Speaking of Carl…
“Where is Carl?” I ask as he slips into the shower and reaches for the shampoo.
“He took an earlier flight. He doesn’t like small planes.” Ian explains and I turn my back on him. His hands immediately find my hair and begin to wash. I smile in satisfaction.
“Did he go to the party last night? I didn’t see him.” Ian’s hands begin to massage the lower part of my hair and I moan.
“Quiet now.” He growls. I laugh, placing my hands over his hoping to ease his pain. “He did. I think that’s when you were at the bathroom. We both went to the happy couple’s table and he congratulated them quickly, then left. Carl is a loner, except for Ava and Nova. He loves to spend time with them.” I nod and move to rinse the shampoo off my hair. He keeps massaging until it’s gone.
“My turn.” I say turning around. His eyes travel downwards and I bend to meet his eyes. “Eyes are up here, knight. Don’t want you too temped, now do we?” He look at the ceiling with a miserable look. I bite my lip and my brows furrow from the huge effort that is not laughing. “Can you get no release at all?” He shakes his head.
“No.” He says with resignation. “Let’s get this night over with, shall we?”
The weigh-in was intense. They had Ian and his opponent, Harris Quinn presented, weighed and then they faced off.
At one point I was sure they were going to kiss, because neither of them would even look in another direction and they were so close…
God, it was awkward.
Harris was serious, but Ian smirked down at him, clearly enjoying that he was about an inch taller.
And now they’re asking all the questions they could possibly ask him.
Ava, Nova, Daniel and I watch as they take his pictures and interview him. Some photographers asked the twins for pictures, but Daniel and I said no, noticing how uneasy it made them.
“We heard this is your last fight…that you will be retiring. Why?” One of the reporters ask him. He nods with a kind smile on his face.
“Boxing is a huge part of my life, a wonderful chapter that I will always take with me. I have been boxing for almost seventeen years and even though it is one of my passions, I consider I it’s time for that chapter to end.” He answers fluently. I notice he didn’t actually answer the question.
“You have been spotted with a mysterious redhead in various spots of California. Is she your girlfriend?” Another reporter pinches in. Ian laughs, even though I know he is annoyed with the question.
We’ve been spotted?
I hope we weren’t spotted in his car…or mine on…those occasions.
“That lovely redhead is indeed my woman.” He charms the cameras with his smoldering eyes.
“Are you saying the Unapproachable Ian Hayden is no more?” He nods.
“That is correct. I am definitely approachable, but only for her.” The crowd swoons. Nova laughs beside me and I find I’m smiling too. The man can charm a stadium.
“And that mark over your shoulder; people are saying it looks a lot like a bite on those weigh-in pictures.” Ian chuckles, running a hand through his hair and the crowd swoons…even the men.
“All I am going to say is that it’s an example of how…approachable I am.” He says with a delicious side smile. I’m getting myself worked up looking at this.
“Ian, are you certain you will win tomorrow?” Ian hesitates.
“No. A good politician would tell you he is certain he will win the elections...I am no politician. I have seen Quinn fight; he’s good, more than good. We have even trained together.” He says with reassuring nods. “I cannot tell you whether I will win or not, but I can say I will give the best of me as I always do.” Lots of nods went around.
“It’s no secret you have, time and time again, been called the most humble boxer...How do you keep all those victories from going to your head?” Ian looks in our direction, specifically at the twins and smiles with a shrug.
“I am thankful to those who have spoken so highly of me, but as to why I am this way…I have two huge reasons,” I smile at his sweetness. Then he looks at me. “Three, actually.” My smile widens in adoration for him.
After many other questions he was photographed again, shirtless and then we fled to the hotel.
We are all in the suite Ian and I share, having dinner.
“Is there anything in particular you guys would like to tomorrow?” Ian asks the twins as we all finish our food.
“No. We already talked about it. We want to stay here until the time of your fight. We can celebrate when we get back home…a party maybe?” Ian smirks at Nova. Ava laughs quietly at her brother.
“A party?” Ian asks, taking one of my hands in his and caressing it. The gesture relaxes me.
“Yep. We can get drunk—for the first time ever because we have never done it before—in your own house…” Nova tries to convince Ian, who kisses my wrist and my eyes start to drift closed.
“Yeah, telling him you’re drinking won’t make it easier on you, Nova.” Daniel says and Ian nods in agreement. Nova chuckles and shrugs.
“An alcohol free party…I’ll think about it. Is this what you want, Ava?” Ava nods. Nova takes a look at her, stands up and offers his hand to her. She takes it and stands with him.
“That would be cool.” She says, nodding. “I’m going to bed.” She comes over and kisses her uncle’s cheek and smiles tightly at me. “Sleep tight, Tito.” She looks at Daniel quickly and walks out. Nova says his goodbyes and joins his sister.
“I’ll be in my room if you need anything. Sleep well.” Daniel says. We return the gesture and he leaves.
“God, I’m exhausted. How are you feeling?” I ask him, stripping out of my shirt and jeans. His eyes follow my movements, still sitting on the floor. I take my bra off, too and stay in my panties. I get on the bed and wait for him to compose himself.
He stands up and does the same; only he is completely naked when he slips onto the bed.
“Like I want to hold you.” He whispers as we lay on our sides facing each other. He slips and arm over my waist and pulls me against him.
I don’t know how the simple touch of his skin against mine can trigger such a huge reaction from me.
My heart grows frantic and my body instantly heats with desire.
“You were pretty blunt in that interview…I thought you’d deny the mysterious redhead.” I whisper against his chest.
“I didn’t have any reason to.” He answers. I kiss right above the X on his chest and move closer to him, wrapping a leg around both of his.
“Thank you.” I once again whisper, letting myself fall into sleep. He grasps my face gently and brings my gaze to his.
“You have nothing to thank me for, my sweet girl. Now sleep. Tomorrow is a big day for all of us.
I don’t know how long he touches my hair, but I fall asleep quickly, enjoying the feeling of bodies together, acting as one.
Ian
I wake up before Violet, thankful that somehow we changed positions so that I am spooning her. I move out of the bed without rousing her and put on pants. I wash my face and brush my teeth, trying to wake myself up entirely.
I rush out of the room and knock on Nova and Ava’s.
“It’s me.” Nova opens the door, hair standing in all directions, eyes narrowed.
“Are you serious? Is the sun even up yet?” I roll my eyes and walk in. Ava is asleep on the bed closer to the wall.
“Yes, the sun is up.” I answer, gesturing for him to take a seat on his bed. He does. “Happy birthday, Novaiden.” He smiles a tired smile. He looks the way he looked at least ten years ago that way.
But my boy is no longer a boy.
“Thank you, but you’re not here to tell me that.” I hesitate. “You have to go.” He says in a whisper.
“I have to go.” I repeat. His eyes meet mine, eyes so much like mine…
“I know…I woke up to take a piss and saw this on the floor by the door.” He says, giving me a piece of paper. I look at him and I see something a parent never wants to see on their kid’s face: fear.
Tell your daddy that if he keeps fucking my daughter, putting her life in danger, I will do the same to his.
And I will make him watch.
I read it again and again until my vision darkens with rage.
“This is not the moment to freak, Ian. Look at me!” Nova says in a stronger voice. I look at him taking deep calming breaths.
How would Manuel know about this?
Mike’s theory about Aaron’s whereabouts before his death make much more sense now.
“Listen to me. After the fight tonight you and your sister are leaving with your grandparents and a few agents. You don’t hesitate, you don’t even come say goodbye. You leave and you follow the Wolves order.” Nova nods and then looks at the crumbled piece of paper.
“What about Violet? Are you telling her?” I shake my head.
“If I tell her, she won’t leave me. I know my woman. She’ll want to go with me and fight through this.” He nods.
“Do you think she’ll think you used her when she finds out?” Nova asks, his icy blue eyes staring into mine.
“If things go the way I want them to, she won’t. I am…going to do the unthinkable to her, break her heart and let her go. If she hates me enough, she won’t come after me, she won’t care.” He glares at me, shaking his head in disbelief.
“She’ll still love you just as much as you’ll still love her when this goes down and you know it.” He says. “Don’t be a coward, Ian. Tell her the truth.”
“I would have told her the moment I met her if she would keep herself alive. But I know her. She’ll want in and it’ll get her killed. I want her safe at home with Lina and Daniel and that’s how it must be.” He nods, not liking my answer, but understanding. There’s a long, lingering silence.
“You’re our father.” It’s not a question and it terrifies the shit out of me.
“No, Nova…I….I don’t know.” I admit, running a hand through my hair. He looks away from me and down at the floor.
“How the fuck can you not know? How can you miss the fucking, the pregnant woman, the birth?” I flinch.
“Aaron thought you two were mine, but I honestly never met the girl he was with. I never knew who she was, when she was pregnant, when she gave birth…I never knew any of it.” I explain. He shakes his head with his head in his hands.
“You were seventeen, Ian. I bet you drank and you fucked girls, half of which you must have forgotten. Maybe she was one of them.” I look at him and say nothing. What is there to say?
“Is that why you never let us call you Dad? Because you felt too guilty? Because deep down you know we’re yours?” Ava’s anger-filled voice makes us both turn around. She sits up and looks at the pair of us like we’re strangers.
“Ava girl,” She holds up a hand.
“Don’t call me that.” Her words are like knives going straight through me. “Doesn’t feel good, does it?” She asks, tears welling up in her eyes.
“I need you both to understand that I have always known…always thought you were his and if you two are mine, I am just finding out.” I take a deep breath. “I could not let you call me that when my brother had died and left you. I just couldn’t.” I stand and look between them. Ava’s face full of anger; Nova’s just empty.
“And Violet…you have been using her this whole time? How could you?” She says with indignation. I walk over to her and the knives in my chest are plunged even deeper into me when she moves away from the bed. “How could you do that to her and keep it from me?”
“It’s not that simple. If I would have told you, you would have reacted this way.” She shakes her head, wiping tears from her face. “My feelings for her are real, Ava. I had to get close to her to get information, but that wasn’t it.” She keeps shaking her head, narrowing her eyes.
“Who are you?” She whispers. I try to get closer to her, but she keeps walking backwards. “Don’t.” She looks past me, at her brother, then at me. “I want to leave now.” If the pain I am feeling is blinding, I can only wonder what she must be feeling like.
“Ava, please. Don’t do this. Come here.” She looks up at the ceiling, then back at me. Those beautiful blue eyes are darkened by pain and horror. She hates me.
“I. Want. To. Leave.” She says slowly. My eyes sting and my chest is heavy. I press my lips together watching my little girl learn who I am…and hate me for it.
“Ava, don’t. It’s his job and about his possibly being our father…he didn’t know.” Nova tries to calm her down. He gets closer to her and she stays. He hugs her to him, putting her face against his chest. He looks at me as if saying ‘I’m sorry’.
“Your grandparents should be here in half an hour. I’ll tell them you guys are leaving as soon as they land.” I say in a voice I don’t recognize. “Have breakfast. I’ll be back in an hour to take you to the jet.” Nova nods and I turn to leave their room.
“Tell me something before you go.” Ava’s voice stops me. “Whatever happened to being honest and true to each other? That was out thing, wasn’t it? Or has your relationship with us been as scripted as yours with Violet?” I decide she needs time and walk out.
I open the door to our suite and walk in, welcomed by the vision of Violet asleep.
This is the moment when it hits me.
I am in love with this woman.
I have lost two people in my life who I love deeply.
How will I survive losing her too?
Violet
I wake up feeling like I should go back to sleep. I am sore everywhere and it’s stupid considering I have done nothing but take a flight and walk the halls of a hotel.
I reach for Ian, finding his thigh. He is sitting up in bed, looking down at me. I smile at him.
“Hey.” He whispers. He looks tired, too. Eyes red, face looking defeated. I sit up and put a hand to his cheek. He shaved.
“Hi.” I caress his smooth face. “You look like a completely different man.” I say. He looks younger, gentler somehow. I like it, but I prefer his trademark stubble. I let my hand fall to my lap. I look down at myself and remember I am naked.
As always, my cheeks begin to burn.
“They always ask me to shave before the fights…guess they like to see all the bruises.” He says with a shrug.
“Have you seen the birthday twins yet?” His expression grows even more serious.
“Ava got sick and since my parents were flying here to watch the fight, they decided to go home.” I frown.
“They have never missed one of your fights.” I say. He nods and I notice his eyes are filling with tears.
“Yeah, well she wasn’t at all fine. They left a while ago. You can call them later to congratulate them, if you want.” He says quickly standing up. “I’ve ordered you breakfast. Get dressed and eat. I’ll be working out. Daniel should be here soon.” He speaks quickly, as if in a hurry to leave. He kisses my forehead, my nose and my mouth just as fast and leaves.
I get ready to start this day. Looks like it will be a pretty terrible one.
“God, Ian! I was worried sick! I went to the gym and they told me you had left an hour before!” I say, breathless with relief as he walks through the door, sweaty and shirtless. He smiles down at me and now that he’s shaved, I can see his dimple in its full glory.
“I was working out, then went somewhere and then working out again, my beautiful girl.” He says, winking at me. The way he speaks and stands is so unusual…
“I can see you were working out. You’re shirtless and soaked in sweat.” He stalks toward me like he’s the lion and I’m prey.
“You like me better this way, remember?” I don’t understand the sudden mood change, but I welcome it. That is, until I smell him.
“Have you been smoking and…drinking?” He shakes his head, then nods, then shakes his head again.
“I took two drags out of that cigarette before I realized what I was doing. And Daniel found me…and we did shots and drank some bourbon.” I just stare at him because I can’t believe this shit.
“You have a fight in less than five hours!” I yell causing him to flinch.
“Don’t be mad. I just wanted it to stop is all.” He murmurs throwing himself on the bed. I look down at him as he rubs his face with both hands.
“You wanted what to stop?” I say in a gentler tone. He doesn’t answer me, so I climb on top of him and straddle his lap. “Answer me.” His hands go to the X over his chest and his eyes meet mine.
“The pain right here. I needed it gone.” He whispers.
“Why? What’s going on?” I ask urgently. He sits up and wraps his arms around me. I run my hands through his hair.
“I’m about to lose everything for something I already lost…and I don’t think,” His voice breaks in my eyes sting, his pain becoming mine. “I don’t think I can take it.” I kiss the top of his head with trembling lips.
“What do you mean?” He presses his head to my chest and shakes his head. “Tell me.” I feel him shake and my heart seems to stop beating. Is he…sobbing?
“I’ll miss you, sweet girl. I’ll miss you so fucking much.” He whispers, his hands digging into my hips, trying to bring me closer to him, which is impossible. I feel numb, not understanding this. I try to make him look at me, but he keeps his head right where it is.
“Why are you telling me this? You don’t have to miss me. I’ll always be with you if you want me to, my love.” I whisper in his ear, soft and gentle, but his shoulders shake again.
After a minute he looks up at me with bloodshot eyes and tears on his face. I wipe them with my thumbs, tears sliding down my own face.
“Please tell me what’s going on?” His eyes, looking as gray as I’ve ever seen them, look past me.
There’s banging on the door and it startles both of us.
“Open the door.” Carl. Thank God.
I try to move, but Ian’s arms tighten around me.
“Open the door, beautiful Violet. Please.” He says in a very gentle tone. I struggle out of Ian’s hold.
If I had any doubts about his current state (which I didn’t), I am convinced now that he is completely drunk. I could never fight off sober Ian.
I open the door to find two very vibrant, yet serious green eyes looking into mine. Carl walks in and I close the door.
He holds a container with four cups of coffee and a bucket. I grimace.
“Yeah, if I were you I would leave right about now.” He says, kissing my cheek. I shake my head. He puts the coffee on a small table and the bucket on the floor.
“I’ll stay.” He smiles at me and touches my face, the way a father would to his daughter.
We have spent a lot of time together this past month and to say we have grown close is an understatement.
“You beautiful, brave girl.” He says. I smile and place a hand above his.
“I can’t leave him like this. It’s not bravery.” He takes his hand away, but takes a step closer.
“Yes it is, Violet. It’s the best kind of bravery, the one enforced by love.” The tenderness is gone after he says this and he turn to Ian, who has passed out.
“So…where do we start?” He looks at me, then picks up the bucket.
“First, we awake the beast.” He walks into the bathroom and I listen as the bucket is filled with water. Ice cold, I suppose.
He walks back in the room and hovers over Ian.
“Boy, wake up!” He yells, but Ian doesn’t even flinch. “Have it your way.” He whispers before dumping the water on him. Ian sits up, instantly, breathing hard.
“Oh, fuck.” He says, looking down at his soaked body. I watch, expecting a reaction. “Carl.” He spits, looking up at Carl,
“Yes, I am. And you are going to hate me by the time of your fight.”
It’s safe to say that Ian did hate Carl after the ice cold shower, all the coffee and the (I shit you not) three hundred push-ups.
But it all was settled when Ian got half an hour of sleep and woke up, apparently not remembering much of the past two hours and a half, the
The only problem is that I do. I still remember and I won’t forget anytime soon.
Ian
It’s just after my fight and I am feeling the energy, the adrenalin, still. It only lasted four rounds before Harrison was knocked out.
Much to my disliking, Carl arranged for bodyguards to take my sweet girl and her friend to the hotel separately. He and I are on the same car, on our way to the hotel. I shake with the adrenalin going through me and avoid speaking
I need to get to Violet.
“You did amazing out there, boy. I,” Carl hesitates. “I am so very proud of you. Since you were just a boy, I’ve been training you and now that this pasrt of your life is over, I’m just…I can’t believe it.” His words take me by surprise and I have no idea what to say to him…
There are several minutes of silence as I try to gather myself.
“You are a father to me, Carl. And I am thankful I had you in my life all those years to keep me from hurting myself or the kids…and of course, all of this success. You and Mike are some of the best things that have happened to me in my entire life.” My voice shakes, as does my body and Carl meets my eyes with a nod.
“Thank you, Ian. And you don’t have to say anymore, I know you’re not yourself after a fight, but I love you as I love my own son. You two are my pride.” I squeeze his arm with a shaking hand.
“I love you too, old man. Even if you’re a pain in my ass.” I say and go back to looking out the window, delighted at the sound of Carl’s chuckle.
We are always…intense with each other and this right here, meant more than anything else between us.
We get to the hotel and I bolt from the car. I all but run up the stairs because I don’t have time for elevators. I need to see her. I need to touch her.
This is our last night together and I want to hold her. I want to remember her forever.
Her beautiful face and the way it lights up, blushes; the way it contorts when I’m inside her.
Her red hair and the way it curls around her; the way it feels against my skin.
Her body and the way it curves beautifully and wears that scar; the way it responds to mine, the way it is part of my own.
Her soul.
Because there is nothing more beautiful than Violet’s soul. The one soul I fell in love with and will ever love.
I rush into our suite and find her sitting on the bed with Daniel kneeling in front of her. He looks at me with a startled face, congratulates me quickly and leaves. The look on his face alone tells me he got the letter I instructed one of my men to give him, but there was something else in the way he looked at me, like he has something to tell me.
It contains all the things he must do tomorrow to get Violet home safe.
“Ian?” Violet says and my eyes focus, finding she is right in front of me.
“Yes, sweet girl?” I whisper. She smiles so beautifully it hurts to watch.
“You were amazing.” I put my hands on her face and peck her lips, quickly. “I have something I want to tell you.” She says, but I interrupt her.
“Thank you for being there. Definitely helped me win.” I say before taking her lips with mine. I kiss her slowly, telling her goodbye with this kiss. A slow, soft kiss in which I pour all my love for her, all my longing. She does the same, holding onto my neck.
“I want you to make love to me however you need me to.” She whispers, stopping our kiss.
“Holding you is enough. Let’s go to bed, let me hold you.” She shakes her head.
“I want you to make love to me.” She repeats. I take her lips and take her in my arms. I walk us both over to the bed and I put her down gently. I hover over her, looking into those beautiful amber depths that are her eyes.
“There is nothing that I want more, but I am afraid I will hurt you. I am still on adrenalin and I’m not sure I can,” She stops me with a kiss.
“Making love isn’t called that way for being soft and sweet. It’s called that way because of the two people who do it.” She says and smiles. “And I love you. I love you more than words could ever express, Ian Hayden.” My chest bursts with too many emotions and I crash my mouth down on hers. I discard of my shirt and hers and go back to kissing her hard, thrusting my tongue deep into her mouth.
She moans, opening her legs wider, seeking more of me against her heat. I hesitantly separate our mouths and stand. I take my jeans off, then hers, along with her lingerie. She takes her bra off and looks at me, waiting patiently.
“I’m not worthy of you…of how unbelievably stunning you are.” I say, looking at her, wanton and perfect on that bed, waiting for me.
“Make love to me.” She whispers. I hover over her once again and worship her. I kiss every inch of her succulent body.
Every single part.
And then I taste her sweet, beautiful pussy and make her come over and over. I need to remember this, too.
Remember that I will never have it again.
“Please, Ian. Next time I want you inside me.” She pants after her third orgasm. I lay on my side and turn her so that she is on hers too, but facing me.
“Guide me inside you, Violet.” She does as I kiss her hard. We both gasp into each other’s mouths when I am fully inside her.
“You feel so good, Ian.” She moans and I throw her leg over mine and thrust into her.
“You’re so tight, so perfect around me.” I groan as I thrust, harder this time. She seeks my mouth and I give it to her. I hold her face pouring everything I feel for her into this kiss as my thrusts become forceful and faster. She holds onto my shoulder, holding on to dear life as her orgasm nears.
She tightens around me and her hips begin to buckle.
“I will never forget you, my duchess, my sweet girl. Never.” I say, breathless almost at the edge. She kisses me and bites my lip hard as she convulses and comes.
I follow her, thrusting once more. I still, deep inside her and fill her with my release. We catch our breath and kiss for what could be minutes or hours.
“I love you, my knight.” She whispers before passing out. I slip out of her and pull her close.
“I love you too, my duchess.” I say when I’m certain she can’t hear me. “I fucking love you so much I don’t know how I will survive this.” I hold her and take comfort in her soft body against my hard one.
Sleep never comes as I think and think and hate myself for my selfishness and for the things I’ll say to her.
I’m telling her everything I know she can’t stand to hear tomorrow and hope that she will hate me enough to leave.
I’m selfish because I wake her and take her once more as the sun comes up and reality settles in.
Violet
I stand minutes after Ian and I both find our release. I wash my face, brush my teeth and put my hair on a messy bun on the top of my head. He still lays on the bed, staring at nothing or everything when I walk out. I am sticky with both of our desires and naked, but I don’t care at the moment.
“What is the plan for today?” I ask him and he looks at me. The way his eyes look at me is different than any other time. This time they are cold and spiteful.
“I have plans. You are leaving.” He says, standing and going into the bathroom. I wait for him to come out and explain, but when he does, he just stares at me like I’m a stranger.
“What are you still doing here?” He asks me. My heart begins to squeeze painfully.
“What do you mean? You want me to go?” I whisper. He smirks, nodding as if it were obvious.
“Well, of course. I already used you for what I needed. You can leave now. There should be people waiting.” I take a step closer to him, not understanding.
Did I miss something?
Is this what he meant with all those things he said yesterday?
“Ian, what are you talking about?” My voice shakes and I hate myself for it. He looks down and makes a disgusted face. I follow his gaze and find he’s looking at my scar.
I look away from his cold eyes and look for a shirt. I put it on, tears welling up in my eyes. How could he transform like that?
It must be his anger…something’s angered him.
I put on underwear and shorts quickly, because I don’t feel comfortable naked anymore.
“I’m talking about reality, sweetheart. You don’t understand yet?” I shake my head, meeting his eyes through a mirror. He walks closer to me, his reflection becoming clearer. His face is nothing like the one I fell for.
He looks hateful, like he could care less about anything.
“No, I don’t.” I say and he chuckles. The most terrible sound I’ve ever heard in my entire life, full of hate and disgust.
“Violet, you were just a conquest to me. You looked good enough to eat and so I have eaten and now I am…full to the point of sickness. This is why it’s time for you to leave. Your pussy is sweet, but it’s not that sweet.” I fight the tears with my newfound fury.
I don’t believe him.
I turn around and get so close to him our chests brush against each other.
“If this is about your anger, you need to tell me now. I will give you time to calm down and then I’ll come back.” I take a deep breath. “But if you keep saying these things to me, I’m leaving and I’ll never come back to you.” He laughs and my chest hurts, my mind registering that this man just used me.
“That’s exactly the point. I want you gone. I am done with you.” I stare at him and we look at each other like that forever.
“All those things you told me about me being different, about you never feeling like this for somebody else…when you told me I was the woman you wanted and no one else…and last night when you said that you were not worthy…” He raises a hand.
“Those are the things little girls like you love to hear, so I said them to you. It worked pretty quickly.” I grab the thing closest to me, a water bottle and throw it right at his face. His lip begins to bleed, and he scowls, his chest heaving with anger.
Good.
“Fuck. You! I fucking trusted you! With everything, Ian! My life, my passions, my body…my fucking scar! Everything! I gave you everything!” I say, shoving at his chest, not shedding a tear.
“Yes, I am aware. It kept me amused long enough.” He pauses as I grab my phone and purse, leaving everything else behind. “About that scar, Violet…you should see a surgeon about it…it is truly horrible, disgusting.” I throw the table lamp beside me at him and it hits his chest before falling onto the floor. I don’t know where this anger and aggression came to me, but I am thankful because I could not stand to cry in front of him.
I won’t show him any more weakness.
“You have seconds to leave before I return the blows.” I walk over to him and meet those cruel eyes.
“I may be naïve and my scar may be horrible, but you are the one who is disgusting. You’re a monster and I feel horrible for Ava and Nova because they love with the illusion with which I fell for.” For good measure I slap his face, because I need the release and I need to see my fingers in his face. “I hope you regret this, but not now. Years from now when you don’t find anyone to love you as I have.” I turn around and open the door, slamming it behind me.
There are crashes and I am glad he’s angry.
But his anger will never compare to what I am feeling now.
“Violet?” Daniel says, coming from nowhere. “Violet?” I look at him and meet his hazel eyes.
“I need to leave. Now.” I plead. He takes his blazer off and puts it around me.
I don’t pay attention where we go or why mainly because Daniel carries me.
I have no shoes on.
But somehow I find myself on a plane, private. I look around and there’s nobody else but us two.
“Is this,” My voice is hoarse. An arm that I didn’t know was around me tightens and Daniel puts my head to his chest.
“I paid for this one. Not him.” He whispers. “Why don’t you sleep? This is ont good for you or,” I look up at him, silencing him.
“Did you hear?” He nods, his jaw working. I feel the numbness fade and the pain begin to settle. “I was a game to him, Daniel. Just a game.” He shushes me and the tears come.
I bury my face against his chest and sob.
I let the sobs wash over me, the tears be shed and the pain tear me apart.
I let it all break me into pieces I know I can never put back together.
Another sobs makes my body shake and Daniel holds on tighter.
“I will be here for you. I will be here through every step of the way.” Daniel whispers reassuringly.
A month ago, I had everything: a beautiful, promising life with amazing friends and a man to love me.
Now? I just have broken pieces. Pieces he shattered.
He destroyed me and I will never forget it.
He left me destroyed, but he also left me with the one thing that I know will make me whole again.
“You will be okay. You are a fighter and you can’t crumble now. I need you to be strong and so does he…or she.” Daniel murmurs putting a hand on my lower abdomen.
“For my baby.” I say and fall into a tormented sleep listening to Daniel’s hushed loving words.