Opal POV
I've heard people talk about moments in which everything around them stood still, including time. I never believed in something like that, as I'd never experienced it. A moment in which only you and someone else were present in a room full of people, surroundings completely drowned out by the event taking place before you. No, I'd never experienced that, although I always found it to be very cliche.
As I watch Chris slowly bring his lips to mine everything around me goes blurry, faded completely into the background. I'm no longer in the middle of my best friend's wedding reception. I'm not standing on a dance floor with many eyes on me.
But, in this moment, I now understand what they meant. I've surprised myself by telling Chris to kiss me. I had every intention of ending this weekend the same way it began. But the words he just said, made me see him differently. His willingness to leave without any other physical intimacy, aside from the little bit we've had, made me really think about the fact that he might actually be different.
His thumb caresses my cheek, tenderly, lovingly even, making me want to melt right here in front of everyone. But it's the moment our lips meet that make me weak. The kiss is delicate, sweet, and leaves me with an indescribable longing when we part after only a moment.
My brain is telling me I need to breathe, having not even realized that I was holding my breath ever since those two words left my mouth.
"Opal." My name falls from his lips so softly that it can only be described as a sigh.
My eyes are still closed, his thumb still resting on my cheek. When I open my eyes, what will I see? Will I still see the same man that has made it his mission to pursue me relentlessly over the last couple of days? Or will I see a man, victorious in his effort and rejoicing in this minor conquest. I'm honestly scared to find out.
"Opal." I hear him call me again.
And that's when the panic begins rising in my chest. A crushing feeling. My heart starts to race again, and not because of the kiss. My head feels like it's starting to spin. My eyes are no longer closed softly, but squeezed tightly.
"Are you okay? Open your eyes, Opal."
"I'm scared," I whisper, removing my hand from both his neck and his hand.
"Scared? Scared of what?" There's no harsh tone in his words, but genuine concern.
I take a step back, pulling myself from this momentary daydream, placing myself back in the midst of the hustle and bustle of the reception. I'd been so lost and caught up in this mere moment that I'd not noticed the music had changed and the dance floor was filled with people dancing. I turn my head, away from Chris, before opening my eyes and place them on Lily instead.
"I need to go get ready to sing," I say before walking away, trying to keep my steps steady, not looking back at him.
"What was that?!" Lily exclaims as I get closer to her. Her face alight with joy. But, I actually walk past her instead. "Wait! Where are you going?"
"Need a minute," I call back, trying to make a beeline for the room we got ready in. My anxiety is beginning to burst forth even more and I need a quiet place to try and calm my mind, or at least try to gather my thoughts.
I reach the room, shut the door behind me and collapse onto the brown leather chair that sits next to the window. For no specific reason a sob escapes my chest, bellowing over my lips. And that's when the hyperventilating starts.
Without realizing it, Laura, Rae and Lily are all squatted down around the chair, each with a hand resting some where on my body.
"Close your eyes, Opal. Deep breaths."
"Do your finger thing."
"Let me get you some water."
Each of them starts firing off helpful hints, but they're so jumbled that all it's doing is adding to the overload in my brain. But oddly enough it's a knock on the door that my brain decides to focus on. One of them, I'm not completely sure who, goes to open it. I hear, "Now isn't the time."
"Where is she?"
The second voice though, causes me to come back to myself, ever so slightly. "Let him in."
The door opens wider as Chris walks through it, coming straight to me. The girls all stand and move away from the chair, Chris taking their place in front of me. He kneels down, resting his hands on my knees.
"Eyes on me, Opal," he commands.
I don't immediately look at him, my eyes opening and shutting quickly, looking down at my lap instead. Chris takes my hands in his and begins rubbing circles along the backs of them.
"Okay, you don't have to look at me, but talk to me. Tell me something that makes you happy. Anything, a memory, your favorite trip, favorite food. Anything."
My head shifts to the side but my eyes remain closed. Such a strange question in this moment. "Uh...I, um..." Focus, Opal. Pick something, anything.
"New York. Junior year of high school."
"Great. Why were you there?" Chris asks me, urging me to continue.
I swallow before starting again. "Pops and Granny, they took me. We went to the 9/11 Memorial. I remember being so overcome with emotions. But, the best was going to see Newsies on Broadway." I begin to feel a smile creep across my face. "Pops wasn't thrilled when I told him he had to dress up for it. He prefers his jeans and blue button up shirts and his cap."
I hear Chris chuckle at my admission. "How did the show make you feel?"
"It was one of the best nights of my life. The music, the dancing, it consumed me. I remember Granny getting confused because I started crying during the very first note of the first song," I laugh out, my eyes slowly rising from my lap to the smiling face in front of me.
"So, you like musicals?"
"Yeah, I really do." I finally notice that my chest doesn't feel tight anymore, the sobbing has stopped and my breathing is normal again. "Hi," I whisper when my eyes meet his again.
"Hi beautiful," he replies with a sweet smile.
"I'm sorry," I admit to him, once again bringing my eyes away from his.
Chris stands to his feet, still gripping my hands. "No reason to be."
I look around his body to where the girls are still standing. "I'm sorry y'all. I'm not entirely sure what came over me."
They shake their heads, assuring me that everything is fine and that they were just concerned for me. I tell them I'll be out in just a few more minutes, after I do a once over and fix my blotchy face.
"You can go too," I tell Chris after the girls leave. "I'm okay now. I'm sorry you had to see me like that."
He's still holding onto my hands, but now he gently tugs on them, lifting me from my seat. "I should be apologizing to you."
Confusion covers my face. "What? Why do you say that?"
"I caused this attack. I pushed you, and I shouldn't have. I am so terribly sorry, Opal."
My heart clenches again, for completely different reasons. His eyes have taken on a look of sorrow. "No! No, please don't say that!" I'm emphatic with my response, practically begging him to not take our moment back. "Please don't regret it!"
Chris POV
Oh no. Oh no, no, no. She thinks I regret it? Is that how I made it sound? I need to fix this, and I need to do it fast or she's going to go back into her episode again.
"Hell no, Opal. I don't regret it at all! I just hate that I pushed you. That's all! There's no regrets, I promise!"
Her eyes had filled with tears again, her lip trembling. "Please, Opal. Believe me. I'm just sorry it caused this attack, that's all." I hold her face in my hands, my eyes pleading with hers to believe me. I'd crush my lips to hers in order to prove my point but I'm afraid to cause an issue again.
"This changed things though, didn't it?" she asks me.
"I don't exactly know what you mean? I've been on vacation remember, I try not to think much," I say, attempting to lighten the mood.
"Seeing me, like this, you'll never see me any other way."
"Opal, don't do this. I know what you're doing. Don't," I demand. She steps away from me again, moving towards the mirror, grabbing tissues along the way.
"I've never been so thankful for waterproof mascara," she says aloud.
I watch her as she repairs her make up and straightens herself out. I'm afraid to say another word to her because I know she's already about to run.
"Time to sing," she says attempting to walk past me. I grab for her hand. "Coming?" she asks me, dodging my effort. All I'm left to do is follow her out and back into the reception.
She continues walking on ahead of me as I stop at the door way. I watch her take the microphone and make her way to the makeshift stage.
Through the entirety of the song she avoids my gaze, not even meeting it once. I'm so confused, so beyond puzzled by this whole situation. There's something she's not telling me, obviously. I hear my own thoughts and realize how dumb I sound considering she's not let me fully in during this entire time.
My guess is that she's ashamed or embarrassed by her behavior during her anxiety attack. But, it doesn't change how I see her or how I feel about her. In fact I may like her even more than before. She's very real in those moments. She's not hiding behind her friends in those instances. They're completely a part of her, no matter how upsetting the attacks can be. I'm just curious as to why she has them. But at this rate, she'll never tell me.
The night continues until we bid farewell to our friends, sending them off on their honeymoon. Jameson makes me promise to visit more, but I tell him I expect the same. Lily hugs me and tells me not to give up. I remind her that it's not me who keeps faltering.
I approach Opal again, as she's packing up her things, the first time since she sang. "Want a ride?" I ask her. She glances over at Laura and Rae, for what I'm assuming is a way out. I silently beg for them to make up an excuse so that she has to accept my offer.
"Our car is full, Opal. I'm sorry." Thank you Rae for that.
"I'm riding with them," Laura pipes up.
"I mean, you're free to walk and see if you can break a third heel, if you want," I joke with her as I can see she's trying to come up with another solution.
Opal concedes with a sigh. "Do I have time to change?"
"Take as long as you need." I realize the double meaning behind my words, but I'm sure she thinks nothing of it. Maybe I hope she doesn't realize it.
I return to the hallway to wait. My stuff is already back in my car. I've lost my tux coat and tie, choosing to just roll up my sleeves and remain in my slacks. I've unbuttoned a couple of buttons for the sake of being tired of getting choked by the collar of this dress shirt.
"Well man" Anthony says, walking over to me, "it was nice to meet you. I'm sure we'll be seeing more of you."
"Nice meeting you too," and I mean it. He's a nice guy, the girls are nice too. Great people. If I lived here I'm sure we'd be great friends. But I don't. "I, uh, I'm not sure when I'll be back."
"But, you and Opal?"
"I don't think there is a me and Opal. Well, not in that way anyway," I sigh feeling defeated.
"That's not what it looked like on the dance floor earlier. I've been around this group for quite a while, and I can safely say, she's not looked at a guy like that in quite a while. No, scratch that...ever," Anthony assures me. I'm just not sure I can trust his statement.
The conversation ends there as the girl's door opens with each of them walking out. "Thanks for waiting," Opal says as she comes to stand next to me.
"Anytime," I say, placing my hand on the small of her back, guiding her to the exit.