Selever removed his hand from mine and I suddenly felt unwelcomed. "Sorry." I said pausing in my step. Matvei nestled into my hair, trying to sheild himself from the hot sun.
I stood there, in the middle of the sidewalk, looking at Selevers back. He stopped in his path, too. Turning to look at me, his eyes held a long look. "Come on." He said to me, I nodded petting Matvei's head, picking up pace so I was able to be closer to Selever.
I focused on the sunlight on my skin, and the feeling of Matvei's bird cage in my hand. The metal had a shiny copper tone, reflecting, and shining in the light. I raised it up to my face inspecting the old cage, I wondered where Selever even got this, maybe, Sarvente had a few birds in her day. That was my only explaination for my question.
I kept walking forward, and noticed the smell of pollen. I whipped my head up to face a rack of flowers. Roses, lilies, daffoldils, you name it, it was there and they were all blooming beautifully. I looked towards Selever. He was already walking away, his ear-phones plugged into his ears, I huffed. "Matvei want to go inside?" I asked. "Maybe they sell some birdseed in there." I said. Matvei only dug his claws into my shoulder and I winced. "Or we can stay out here." I said.
"Hi there!" A young mans voice rang out. "Are you looking for something special?" He asked, I sniffed a small yellow daffodil then turned to the boy. He was wearing a cheap apron that read: "Wake up and smell the roses!" The boys brow hair was sweeped to the side, inside his green eyes there was a look of confusion deep inside them. The boy snapped his fingers and pointed to me.
"Hey! You're that kid who graduated two years early! (Y/n) right? No way! I thought I recognised you!" They guy said. I shot him a look. They boy did look familiar a bit. I mean it was anyones guess now. "You?" I silently panicked. Who was this guy?
Alright play it cool.
"Spencer? No, wait, that was the quarterback guy. Jackson?" He crossed his arms and raised a brown eyebrow. "Um... Beckett?" I looked to Matvei and he turned his back to my face. You little traitor! I turned to the boy laughing and blushing in embarrasment. "Sorry, I don't recognise you." Suddenly, he started laughing. "Anthony." He said and I scanned my brain tapping my head. "Oh yeah! You were in Theatre class with me!" I said. "Chemistry, gym, math and reading." He named off lifting a finger for each class. "You seriously dont remember me? I like confe-." He blushed. "You were my partner in Chem! I remember now! You're they guy who mixed my iodine mixture with that hydrogen peroxide!" I laughed, Anthony's blush reddened, rubbing the back of his head. "Yeah that was me. You were covered in elephant toothpaste from head to toe." I shifted Matvei's bird cage to my other hand and walked up to him. "Ha, what wasnt covered in elephant toothpaste that day?" I asked. "Mrs. Jenson wasnt happy about that, I got suspended for a week." He laughed. I punched his shoulder and he rubbed it gently, laughing with me.
"So how's it going? I see you cut your hair." Anthony messed with my hair. "It's a bit uneven, I have some sheers inside maybe-" I pushed him. "You cut my hair off you'll be missing that finger of yours." Anthony laughed. "Well since you asked, I graduated, you already knew that, I didnt really know what I want to do. I guess college is an option. But I can always complete that online." I said, Anthony and I walked inside dispite Matvei's obvious protest. "Sounds good." He rang up a customer who was picking out flowers and sending her on her way. "Yeah, I guess, But in all seriousness, I became a nun at the local church." Anthony leaned against the counter to look at me; eyes widened. "Really now? I thought you'd become a lawyer, or, you know, something." He said. "You know since you always liked to argue." Anthony stuck out his tongue and I reached over to hit him.
"Well it was kind of an idea; but hey here I am. Nun in training!" Anthony laughed and looked at the door, suddenly diverting his attention. "Hello sir! Are you intrested in a bouquet for your partner today?" He asked, picking up the sheers.
"No need." I recognised the voice and turned to Selever. "I thought you were walking ahead of me." I said. "Yeah, well, when I turned back you weren't fucking there!" Selever said. "I saw roses I'm going to smell them!" I huffed. Selever looked at Anthony, to his stupid apron, scowled, then turned to me. "Were you flirting with this cumguzzler?" His eyes shone dangerously. "What? No! Dont call him that!" I said. Anthony laughed, backing away. "My names Anthony, sir." Anthony said, trying to escape Selevers look.
"Did I fucking ask?" I punched Selever's arm. "Jesus, Selever, calm down. He was my classmate in high school. We were just talking, jeez." I said. "I thought, we were taking that damn bird to the fucking vet?" He harshly said, putting emphasis on the "we". "Well here! Take Matvei and go, I'm window shopping for flowers." Selever huffed and grabbed my hand. "Come on, before the vet closes." I slapped his hand away. "Fine fine. Just let me..." I picked some lilies in a bouquet, walked up to the counter, and started speaking. "Ring this up." Selever huffed shifting from foot to foot, like looking at Anthony was such a waste of his precious time. "Well? What are you waiting for, dipshit? Are you shitfaced or something? Stop drooling, and ring them up!" Anthony shot Selever a look and I stood between them, taking my wallet out of my pocket.
"Keep your money (Y/n), it's on the hou-" Selever kicked the display case, a giant crack in the glass split beneath Selevers foot all the way towards the top left-side. "That'll be 13.99 cash or credit, do you have rewards with us? No? I didnt think so. Here you go!" He finished, his face was shrouded in fear as he stared at Selever. I shot Selever a look, suddenly he was by my side, wrapping his arm around my waist, shooting Anthony a dirty glare before leading me out of the shop.
"I'll be back! I didnt get to see all the flowers!" I yelled back to Anthony, I saw him light up immediatley.
"You're so fucking petty." I said, once we were walking again. Selever placed the bird on my shoulder and huffed. "Well, at least Im not talking to a shitstick who got his apron from the fucking dollar store." I stomped my foot. "How dare you! Dont insult my friends like that." I huffed. "I do what I fucking want." He glared at me. "You're just jealous of Anthony." I said. "Hes sweet, nice, and he knows proper respect." I heard Selever grumble from my side. "Of course you'd say that. "Oh, Selever is a cruel demon while Anthony is such a fucking angel." Fucking gross keep your feelings to yourself, you whore." I held Matvei's cage, ready to hit Selever but I huffed looking at Selevers hand on my waist, I raised my eyebrow.
"Well, well, well, and I didnt believe it at first. The great Selever, son of Sarvente is jealous of a flower boy." I said, Selevers arm tightened around my waist. "So, what if I am? What the fuck does that guy have compared to me? Look at me babe, Im fucking hot, I have major bars that make any whore drop their panties for me, Im fucking strong and such a great listener! You're lucky to even be on my arm right now." Selever bragged. I sighed. "You know how to make me jealous." I said huffing, Selever scratched my waist.
"Dont be, you're one of my four important people." I felt my cheeks warm and smiled. "Yeah." I said. "I know." I placed a hand over his and huffed. "But, if you do that to one of my friends again I wont let you get off that easily. I will tell Sarvente youre messing with me."
Selever laughed and we made our way inside the animal hospital. "You wouldn't dare."
ooOOoo
"You know, those are for Matvei, right?" I said, raising an eyebrow at Selever. "I dont fucking care. I'll steal from him!" Selever said, popping a few sunflower seeds into his mouth.
"Give me some." I said, and he placed a few in my hand. I held them up to Matvei and popped one into my mouth. It felt weird, but, it wasnt bad. "Sunflower seeds aren't for everyone you know." Selever said and I huffed giving the rest to Matvei. "I just wanted to try it." I said with a huff.
Selever poked my head and I rubbed the space where he poked. "Stop it." I huffed, he wrapped his arm around my waist. "Dont be fucking huffy dickhead." Selever said. "We found out the damn bird is okay, so smile." I forced a smile and Selever sighed. "Well its better than nothing." He said, he brought his hands to my face squishing my cheeks.
"SMILE!" Selever urged. "Smile!" I shook my head, Selevers eyes shone red. "Smile, or I wont let you see that guy-" He waved his hand in the air trying to emphasis. "Ant boy guy, fucking nerd." He said, before girpping my face in his hand.
"Mmmhmmmhmm." I said huffing. "What was that you little shit?" He asked, I gripped his wrist and released my face from his grasp, "You'd do that for me? Even though you hate me "Stopping to smell the roses?" Will you?" I said, Selever grumbled, I looked at him almost pleadingly. "Seleverrrrrrrrr." I pouted. "If Matvei and I smile, can I really hang out with Anthony?" Selever hid his face in his other hand cheeks warm. Straight in the heart.
I latched onto his chest. "Sel? Im willing to do anything." I gave him (eye color) puppy dog eyes. Maybe if I thought hard enough I could cry on demand. "Well if you insist, more convincing." He said. I rested my head on his shoulder, Matvei climbed on my head. "A hug everyday?"
"More." I thought and thought as I dug my face into his sweater. "I'll make you bouquets whenever you ask." I said, and he laughed low into my ear and I felt my cheeks warm. His finger ran along my chin as we stood in the examination room. A vet knocked on the door and Selever released me.
"Alright ya'll, can I take the little angel to get a little x-ray?" The woman said reaching her arms out to Matvei. I handed him over slowly. "Thanks, sweetheart, I'll come back with the doc when we're done examining him." I nodded and she promptly left, Matvei crowing in her hands to be put down.
Once the door closed Selever pushed me against the examination table. God, how many times have I been in this situation before?
"Now we're alone, darlin'. Lets continue with our..." He ran his hands up my shoulders and rested them on my cheeks, I felt myself shiver in anticipation, "Little contract. We were up to. Bouquets and flowers right?" He asked, his thumb ran over my lips and I felt all the blood in my body rush to my cheeks as I stared into Selevers crimson eyes.
"I'm not satisfied yet babe." He said the lights flickered and dimmed. I turned away to look at the door, Selever forced me to look back into his eyes. "Look at me slut. I want you to look at me." I bit my lip, looking up at him. "Yeah?" I made out, through stutters, I was embarrassed all over again. "Keep going." He said. I heard a hint of an accent in his dangerous words and I felt my knees tremble, suddenly one of Selevers hands were at my waist holding me up. "Um... I'll," I looked at Selever. He was smirking down at me, "I'll..." Selever laughed and tilted my head up.
"I'll tell you what babe." He said licking his lips. "I'll let you hang out with that Anthony guy if," He placed a hand over my mouth and kissed it. "You give me a real kiss. Right on the lips." Selevers breath mingled with mine, the hand on my waist tightened. "And who knows?" He started. "Maybe one wont be enough, and you'll be begging me for more~." He said, I bit my lip and he grabbed my hand. "So do we have a deal (Y/n)?" Selever raised the arm on my hoodie gently kissing up my hand trailing up my arm in a tantilizing impersonation of what I could expect. I unconsiously nodded, agreeing to the deal. "Don't worry. You can still talk to him. But I promise that it'll hurt." Selever bit my pinkie, I felt tears well up into my eyes when I felt his fangs pierce my skin. There was a faint rose glow coming from my hand and like a dark bracelet, my blood congealed dripping down to my right middle finger forming ring around it.
"Dont try cutting it off either, it'll hurt worse than if you hang out with Ant boy." He said the lights flickered back on. I looked at the dark ring twisting it. "You like it?" Selever took my hand and ran his fingers over the smooth ring. "It'll be there until you kiss me." I pushed him away. "I'm curious."
"How much it'll hurt?" Selever finished for me. I nodded but before he could finish the doctor walked in and we rushed into our seats.
"Sorry you two we just had a sudden outage, lots of flickering lights. I'll be back with the patient in just a moment. A fiesty one. But let me tell you what we have on your feather baby right now." She said.
ooOOoo
"Selever, how the fuck, did my bird get a concussion?" I asked, we walked out of the hospital, Matvei was craddled in my arms as we made our way to the pet store.
"I dont know what you're talking about babe." He said. I huffed. We passed the flower shop on our way back and I saw Anthony running towards me. "(Y/N) HEY! (Y/N)!" He held a bouquet of lilies in his hand. I turned to him to say 'hi' but a sharp sting ran through my hand like someone bit me. "Hi, Anthony. Is there something you needed?" There was another bite and Anthony held up the lilies. "Your body gaurd forgot to take these when you left." I looked to Selever, he was by my side glaring down at Anthony. Before another sharp sting went through my fingers I grabbed the bouquet and shooed Anthony off, relieved when the tiny shocks stopped once we walked away.
"So, hows the biting pain of shame?" Selever asked my eyes widened. "What! Was that you biting me!" I asked pushing him. "Nope. Your little ring gets possesive for me." He snickered and I stomped my foot. "You! Demon!" I huffed.
Selever laughed, taking the flowers. "Come on you little shit. Lets go get your bird a cage." He said ruffling my (hair color) hair before scratching Matvei's beak. I huffed and rubbed the ring on my finger and smiled.
"Okay demon boy." I said reaching for hid hand and swinging them together. "Let's go together!"
ooOOoo
I think back to that memory a lot. We then walked to the store, Selever purchased a big cage with a few toys for Matvei to play with. I could never forget the look Selever had when he set up the cage for the small creature.
"So, are you finally accepting him as ours?" I joked, urging the white bird into the cage and Selever only smiled. "Well not if you say shit like that no." Selever had ruffled my head sending a kiss to my forehead before walking off into the kitchen. Breathed in a long breath I ended up falling against the cage, startling Matvei.
That night I dreampt of the garden, filled to the brim with scattered roses. Selever stood in the middle, messing with a tie. Looking more dapper than usual. He spoke a few words to me but he was silenced by the whirling wind and the sharp blades of the thorns scraping my legs and arms. A (favorite color) (favorite flower) grew out of my lips, elever pulled the beautiful flower out of my mouth and it dripped red budding once again and suddenly blooming into a glowing red rose that was ever present in my recent dreams.
I woke from that dream and couldnt contain my racing heart as it leapt in my chest, I couldnt breath.
The dream occupied my mind when I was doing mass with Sarvente and even feeding bird seed to Matvei. Mass was extremely hard to get through now, esspecially.
Anthony stopped by with his family every Sunday and he would always find an excuse to pull me to the side and talk to me. Each time, a small shock would go through my fingers, getting worse with the amount of time Anthony stayed there in my presence.
Though this Sunday was stangely different.
The smell of smoke filled the church and most of the guests and Sarvente were getting annoyed with the smell of ash. I was even getting a head ache just inhaling the smell. It was good that Sarvente allowed me to open up the windows, which made things more bearable at least for me.
At one point Sarvente told me to go find the person smoking and take their cigarette away. It was then I found a man, disheveled, unkept teal hair under a brown cap. The smell of his cigarette blew into my nose and I huffed in annoyance.
I snatched the cigar from his lips and threw it on the ground digging my white heel into the cigarette butt. I thought about my mom when I taken her cigarettes. She would scaratch at he body like it itched her until she bled because she didnt know a way to cope without the substances in the cigar. I would always end up giving her back the pack of cigarettes and watch her eat through half of them before finally falling asleep on the couch. I gripped my habit and sighed out imagining an imaginary cigarette in my hands as I breathed out.
He didnt seem annoyed that I did that, in fact the guy just sat until mass was over to reach into his pocket for more cigarettes. I grabbed the box and darted off with it, past Sarvente and the patrons of the church right smack into Selevers chest in the garden.
Selever caught my hands and I dropped the box of cigars. Selever twirled me around and kissed my cheek. "Whats the hurry babe? Running from your feelings for me?" He asked and looked to the small package I dropped releasing my hands and picking it up.
"Cigarettes?" Selever asked taking one out of the box. "I didn't know you liked smoking in private." Selever said and I snatched the cigarettes out of his hands. "I don't smoke!" I said. "But-" I started.
"Let me guess. You want to try it?" Selever placed the cigarette he was holding into my hands. "Okay then." I looked up at him surprised. "You're not going to stop me?" I asked I lifted a hand to my forehead and breathed in hard letting the anxiety run through me. Selever grabbed my hand and rubbed the back of it. "Hey! Eyes on me." He ordered. I looked up into his crimson eyes and tried to calm down.
My hands clenched around the pack of cigarettes and I bit my lip. "No, I am not going to stop you." Selever started. He placed a finger to my mouth. "And before you spout more of that, "But Selever you're like my boyfriend! You're supposed to stop me!", bullshit." I raised an eyebrow shooting him a glare. "It's not that I want you to do it. I don't, you can really hurt yourself." He said his fingers moved to my cheek and pinched it. "But if you really want to do that shit can I really stop you?" Selever let me go and I breathed in a sigh.
"Have you ever smoked?" I aksed Selever and he smirked poking my nose. "Yeah, I've smoked a bit of pot, smoked a vape, nothing to serious. But I still did it." Selever said. "Did you do it to cope?" Selever looked at me and a flash of pain ran through his eyes. "Yes and no."
"Did it feel good?" I asked and Selever's eyes hardened. "It depends on the situation." Selever and I stood there in the garden. Clouds gathered over us and I looked up at Selever. "Can you tell me why?" I asked and I felt Selever pick me up off my feet knocking the breath out of me. "Maybe another time babe."
Gripping the cigarettes close to my chest I pulled up the one Selever took out of the box. "Yeah, yeah I understand, thanks Selever." I said I hopped on my tippy toes to reach his cheek pinching it. Selever winced. "And for the record we arent dating~" I said running off to find the strange man in the church. "Not yet babe!" Selever called.
I found the man leaning against the doors and I handed him back his box of cigarettes. "Im, sorry sir." I said holding a cigarette in my hands. "I didn't mean to steal from you I just-"
"You need a lighter?" The stranger asked suddenly. I blinked and he pointed to the cigarette in my hand. "Huh? Uh, pardon me?" He took back the box and pulled out a cigarette himself. "A lighter, do you need one to light that cigarette kid?" He asked. "Huh!" I felt embarrassment well up in my cheeks, "You look frazzled. You need a cigar to cope?"
There was that word again. "Cope." That word seemed to be running through my head in long tiring circles.
"Uh, yeah. Just not in the church." I said. We walked outside and closed the doors to the church. He lit up my cigarette and introduced himself as Garcello. The man, Garcello, decided to pay a visit to the church today because he was bored.
Garcello took a breath of the cigarette and I stared at mine thousands of thoughts running through my head like a fast train. My mother, the fast pace of joining the church, Sarvente, church duties, Selever, Selever, Selever.
My feelings for Selever.
I leaned against the side of the church falling down the wall. And like my mother used to do, I raised the lit cigarette to my lips and took a long, slow, drag.
Thank you fore reading chapter 12! Stay tuned! If you liked this chapter please vote and comment! I love all your comments!
Orange lilies: hatred, pride, wealth and jealousy