16 Weeks Along
-Harry's POV-
My fingers mindlessly punch in the code to the front door as I adjust the bag thrown over my shoulder. It beeps, alerting me I put in the wrong code. It beeps again. And again.
Fuck. Can I get anything right?
I didn't sleep on the plane. I'm not sure if I even blinked. To worried, my mind wouldn't stop thinking. About how to make this right. About how to explain myself.
The door swings open as I start to punch in the code again, my eyes being met with big brown ones.
They're red. Her cheeks are wet.
She's been crying.
I'm such a piece of shit.
"Av..." I step towards her, but she only backs away. Stepping aside so I can enter the house.
I don't grab her like I would like to. I don't hold her in my arms and kiss her like I want to. Like I need to. I just walk past her, setting my bag on the floor right inside the door before closing it behind me.
She wipes her face as I look at her, my heart breaking. I've hurt her. Again.
Again.
She stares down at the floor as I move towards her, stopping right in front of her and gently taking her hand.
"I didn't... I didn't cheat on you." I shake my head, disgusted at the thought. "Swear it. I wouldn't. Ever."
"I know." She says quietly.
"Then why... why're you crying?" I question, reaching my hand up and wiping a tear off her cheek with the pad of my thumb.
She flinches. She fucking flinches away from my touch. I hate myself.
She turns from me, snatching a letter off the entryway table. Holding it out for me to take.
I glance over it, confusion overtaking my features. "I don't understand..."
"A couple weeks ago I sent the paperwork in to get my name changed."
I suck in a breath, my eyes scanning over the second page. God, I've fucked up.
"Wanted it to be a surprise." She laughs like she just heard a bad joke, "This was at the office along with my other mail. Found it this morning."
I look back down at the papers in my hands, realizing what I'm holding.
I don't speak. I can't. There's not much to say other then I'm sorry. I'm a total fuck up. I love you.
None of it will be enough. Not this time.
"Why..." She chokes, trying to fight off tears. "Why did I get a letter back saying our marriage license is a fake? Did you... You had me sign a fake marriage license?"
"Ava... Just let me explain alright? I can explain..."
"Answer my question." She cuts me off, "Did you have me sign a fake marriage license at our wedding?"
"Av... please." I reach for her hand, but she moves it away.
"Did you have me sign a fake marriage license at our wedding?" She repeats herself.
"Yeah." I answer softly.
"The UK one we signed... that fake too?"
I nod slowly, staring into her eyes. God, I've fucked up.
Her palm connects with my cheek quickly. I hear it before I even feel it. A sharp sting. One that's well deserved.
"I don't even know what to say to you." She spits. "You... you pretended to get married to me?"
"What? No." I shake my head, "Baby.. no. We are married. In Italy. We signed an Italian marriage certificate too. That was real. Every bit of it. I swear to God that's real. We're married."
She scoffs at me, still shaking her head. "For nine more weeks."
"What?"
"Harry, our Italian marriage certificate is only good for a certain amount of time. You basically just use that as proof to get certificates from your native country."
"What? No." I shake my head. I would of known that.
I stand frozen as Ava pulls the paperwork out of my hand, fumbling through it till she gets to a copy of our Italian marraige certificate. She shoves it at me and my eyes scan over the page quickly.
There... in tiny little letters at the very bottom it says it. Valid for 90 days.
"We'll sign the others.. Real ones." I say hurridly. "Fuck my contract. We'll get the others signed. Today alright?"
"Your contract?" She narrows her eyes at me slightly.
"Yeah... I... It says none of us can get married for the duration of it." I rub the back of my neck nervously.
"Duration being?.."
"Bout two years."
"You knew.. You knew this the whole time?" She shakes her head at me in disapointment.
"NO. No, course I didn't. Found out just two weeks before the wedding."
"That's why you moved the wedding location..." She says to herself more then me. "Harry... can you ever just tell me the truth? For once?"
"I thought I could fix it." I ramble off, not stopping to even take a breath, "My lawyer said he could. If we got married out of the country. Only found out right before it wouldn't work. Night before actually. What the hell was I supposed to do? Cancel our wedding? I knew I could make it work out. I can still make this work Ava. There's a loophole, I know it. Got nine more weeks to find it. I will. Promise."
She steps away from me, not even able to look me in the face. "And you couldn't just tell me.. You had me sign a fucking fake license?"
"I knew you'd be upset." I move towards her again, but she holds her hand up. "Ava, I knew you'd want to wait. So yes, I made another fucking wrong decision. Again. And I felt awful for it. Lawyer suggested it, don't know what the fuck I was thinking agreeing with it. That's why I've been acting wretched. It was wrong... so so wrong. Just knew you'd want to wait. I could't wait Av. I wanted us to be married. We ARE married."
"For nine more weeks, then we were never really married at all." She looks up into my eyes.
I can't stand it. The way she's looking at me.
"We'll sign the real ones. I mean it Ava.. fuck my contract. I'll make this right. I will, I'll make it right."
She's full on crying now. Pushing me away from her. Shoving my chest as I try to wrap my arms around her, telling her over and over again how sorry I am.
"Av.. please." I move towards her again, but she holds her hands up. "Let me make this right... I've... I need to make this right."
She won't even look at me now. Trying and failing to hold back her tears. I've given up, my cheeks are wet from them. I've fucked up so badly this time.
"Please baby.. just listen to me.." I try to find the words, knowing nothing I say could fix this. "I love you. I love you Av."
Her hand moves over her mouth as she cries harder, still shaking her head at me. Still not believing what I've actually done.
I try to place my hands on her arms, try to pull her towards me. I fucking hate seeing her this way. And it's cause of me. Yet again the love of my life is crying over some ridiculous shit I've pulled. I need to comfort her, but she won't let me. She uses all her strength to keep pushing me away. I keep trying, needing to have my arms around her. Show her how much I love her. How sorry I am. But again and again she shoves me backwards, not wanting my comfort. Not wanting anything from me.
"Please.. love just calm down." I plead with her as she continues crying. Her whole body shaking. "Please Av... it's not good... Doctor said no stress. That's why I haven't been able to tell you. So worried about you and the baby."
"Don't you do that!" She snaps at me, "Don't you use us as an excuse!"
"No." I shake my head vigorously, "Not what I meant. Just please.. let's sit down yeah? Please baby..."
I grasp ahold of her elbow gently, softly tugging her towards the living room.
"No." She pushes my hand away. "I c-can't have you h-here."
"Ava no.. please love." I place my hand on the small of her back as she turns away from me. "We need to talk about this... We have to talk about this. We have to."
She shakes her head, only crying harder.
"Baby.. please calm down." My voice sounds panicked as I look down at her, "Please... it's not... not good for the baby."
She wipes her hand over her cheeks, staring straight ahead. "Y-you... you're not g-good for t-the baby."
I suck in a sharp breath, stepping away from her. "What?... No... No."
She snatches my bag off the floor, opening the front door. "Leave."
"No.. no."
She closes her eyes, composing herself before looking straight into mine. "Go. Now."
She holds my bag out to me, my head shaking on it's own. "No Ava. No."
She thrusts the bag into my arms, "Harry, do something right for once. Just leave."
She shoves me outside. I couldn't fight back if I tried. I'm a mess as the door slams in my face, as I drop down onto the steps. My elbows resting on my knees as my head falls into my hands.
How do I fix something completely broken? Shattered into such tiny pieces I can't even find them all to put them back together?
The only thing I have left is apologies and regret.
Two things that will never fix what I just completely destroyed.
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