Sunday, January 3, 2021
~~~
So um, I wrote a little something?
And it's like, super poetic, I'm honestly really happy with it, but it's also super dark?
I mean the relationship it refers to sounds super toxic and it could be read as referencing abuse or self harm, so um be careful about that. I'll explain what exactly is going on it the words after y'all read it so um, here's the trigger warning?
It could be taken in very dark subjects so please be careful!
Your words consume me, weaving themselves into mind, into my life. You took ownership of my heart without thought, toying with it like a cat with a caught mouse. For though you burn me every time, I come back every time. I am the mouse you caught, yet you play with me still, to bring enjoyment or because you care I know not. But I come back again and again because I'm addicted to the burn, addicted to the terror of the capture.
Every time I wear red I think of you. Of the blood on your hands, on your heart, on your mind. You're drenched in it, in the blood. You smell of it, taste of it, you cannot escape the blood that follows you wherever you go. Yet I can't help but forget about it every time I see you, for every time I see you I just see that: you. Never the blood, though it drips to the floor and pools underneath you and is left behind at every step. Only you.
Yeet
Okay okay, ready for the breakdown?
The inspiration:
A good friend of mine who writes incredibly angsty stories/oneshots and sometimes very questionable relationships/very morally grey characters who have complex relationships that walk the line between healthy and unhealthy.
Odd inspiration I know, but I happened to see a red shirt of mine and then I immediately went to thinking about my friend and how good her writing is and how she writes her characters and I was like "time to write two paragraphs that reflect the abstract characteristics of many of the characters she writes"
So Lucy if you're out there, this is not an insult! I mean this in a compliment way, please don't be mad at me ;-;
Also yes the heart is a both a reference to you and also the one time you let a character top that I didn't believe you wrote until you told me to look it up and I did and I was shocked.
The intent:
It's either an internal or external dialogue from one person. We don't know who, it's ambiguous on purpose. We also don't know who they're referring to as this "you" or what their relationship is. It could be romantic/sexual or it could be platonic.
What my intent was that the first paragraph took direct reference to 3 things: hunter and prey themes, hunter and prey themes in Lucy's stories, and how no matter how many times Lucy murders me with angst I still come back for more.
The second paragraph is meant to reference 3things: the character body count Lucy has, the body count her characters have in story, and how I always just see it as another story and forget who wrote it just so I can be stabbed in the heart again.
Everything else:
Yeah this could be interpreted many different ways. I mean, I wrote it with innocent intent yet portrayed it in such a way that it really reflects the overall tone of most of Lucy's stories, which is generally very dark themes. (Is this becoming a plug for Lucy?? I didn't mean it to be but I think it is. Oops, I'll tag her at the end okay?)
So I may be thinking of angst and the author and reader/friend relationship but someone else could see an abusive relationship between two partners, while another sees it as a toxic friendship, and there are so many more ways.
I won't tell you how to feel or see these paragraphs as, because that's really up to you. I just gave you background and some context.
My dear friend Lucy is Paranoia_Rising and she's awesome, please check out her work!! She has a oneshot book along with a couple Sanders Sides stories, I believe one is completed and the others are on-going as of right now. I highly recommend reading gall of them, but that's just me. If you love Prinxiety, read The Bloody Crown like holy shit that's good I cried/screamed my way through that book and really showed just how much of a prinxiety simp I am.
Anyways sorry about all that in case you don't really care about like, any of it.
I just wrote two paragraphs and went "wow, I really like the metaphors and similes I used, plus all those other literary devices I don't remember the names of or whatever. And it really sounds dark, I like the tone of it. Time to show everyone who reads LNT2 and go on a literature teacher rant :3"
Also Lucy please don't kill me for anything I said, I meant it as a compliment but idk if you feel the same so please yell at me if you don't like what I said ;-;
Stay safe kiddos and remember, murder is the answer!
Love you all <3<3<3
~Ink