This Years Love

39.

Justin's POV

Go look up 'heartbroken' in the dictionary. I'm almost positive you will find a picture of me as the definition. But saying I am heartbroken is an understatement. I knew it. I KNEW it was too good to be true. I don't know why I let it get this far. I gave her everything. EVERYTHING. And she goes and kisses Hunter? Having his body all pressed up against hers. I feel psychically and mentally broken. I gave her the promise ring I was intending to give her tonight after her party, but that plan obviously turned to shit. Now I usually don't cry, but now is a time where I just broke down. Maybe this is why I never had a relationship. Too afraid of this feeling. The most painful feeling in the world. Starting at my heart and pulsing through out my whole body. She tried to explain it all to me but I just couldn't take it. I needed time to think, and maybe see where things are when I get back from North Carolina, I was caught up in my thoughts and tears when I felt my phone vibrate. I could almost guarantee you it was Emma.

From:Girlfriend

Please just let me explain

To:Girlfriend

There's nothing to explain.

I pressed send after hesitating on whether or not to actually give her the chance to tell me everything.

From:Girlfriend

Yes there is. Justin I would never intentionally do something like that to you, I wouldn't even do anything like that to you no matter what. I love you more than anything! Why don't you believe me?

I don't know if I believe her or not. The situation is just too confusing and I don't know what to think. She fooled me. And the sad part is, is that I had a feeling this would happen, but I fell head over fucking heels in love with her anyways.

To:Girlfriend

I truly love you, but I don't know what to believe. Like I said, it was all too good to be true.

From:Girlfriend

Please just let me explain. Talk to me.

I need time to think, I don't know what to think though. I mean, you try going and looking for your girlfriend to see if she's okay, and find her ex boyfriend pressed up against her kissing him. Yeah, not a lot is functioning correctly in my head at the moment.

To:Girlfriend

I can't. I need time to think. We will see how things are when I get back from NC next week. I'll talk to you later. Bye.

That's my only option, I'm broken and I can't put myself back together and forget what shattered me in the first place.

---

I woke up early, well no I didn't wake up because I never actually fell asleep. I couldn't sleep what so ever after everything that happened last night. I packed my bags and met my mom and Jazzy downstairs since they had to drive me to the school to meet the team on the bus. It's five o'clock and its like an 13 hour drive from Massachusetts to North Carolina. I honestly don't know why we are driving there. I guess that will be my chance to catch up on the sleep I missed.