In This Lifetime

Chapter 2: I Wanted to Keep You

He's now driving to somewhere I don't know and I do not even bother to ask where he is taking me because I know he's just going to eat.

The silence engulfed us, but it wasn't awkward. The atmosphere was calm. It was a type of silence that makes me feel at ease, and I admit I longed for this calmness in my life ever since he left. Not to be too dramatic, but I missed him so much.

It's just that, I always understand people with their actions and the surrounding forces that made them act that way. I knew then that Bright has something going on in his head. And he is the type of person who keeps his problems within himself and that's the thing I really hate about him. I always told him that he can always have someone to lean on and have someone by his side when the world turns upside down.

I was just waiting for him to tell me everything.

But when Bright never bothered to talk to us anymore, I feel lost. I didn't know where and what I did wrong. I couldn't understand the way things unraveled.

This silence makes me want to ask him about it, or about what was the reason behind all of what he had done. But, I just couldn't find the strength to because I have always felt like I was also the one to blame. Maybe he is not still ready to talk about it. Or maybe he really didn't trust me at all, ever since. 

I smiled bitterly as I looked at the route we're now going in.

"As usual," he said as he parks at a familiar place we always eat when we were in 1st year. Asiatique is a place where you can find all the things you are craving for. Different stalls are aligned perfectly where the food and other things you can find are diverse. From seafood, Asian and American cuisines, fruits, and you can also find souvenirs, shirts, bags, and other apparel here.

I followed him as he grabbed my arm and we immediately immersed ourselves through the busy crowd. We then straightly went to the other side of Asiatique where you can feel the warm and delicate breeze of that comes from Chao Phraya River.

The view of towering skyscrapers and intricate temples adds to the breathtaking scenery. You can also see boats and ferries strolling through the river which makes you feel calm and serene in every possible way.

I pulled my arm from him and went to the railings of the view deck. I feel alive as I inhaled the humid breeze of wind that caresses me. I missed this kind of feeling!

I noticed the man beside me chuckle as he now rests his arm on the railings. 

"How are you Win?" He gently remarked while his eyes are directly staring at me intently. I shrugged him off as I just hovered my sight towards the tall buildings from the other side of the river.

"I'm good, stop acting like we're close." I said timidly then noticed him still looking at me. He beams a smile but all I can see was sadness deeply ingrained on in his gaze.

"I'm sorry, Win. I had my reasons," he replied but I really don't know what to say. I am not angry at him at all, I know that.

"We were your friends Bright. You could've told us if there's something wrong," I said as frustration seethes within my tone. He didn't reply so I faced him.

"I was your bestfriend! And you leaving just like that made me think where I did wrong!" I shouted. Gosh, this man really needs some kicking.

"Win it's not your fault I—"

"It's like losing someone without knowing the reason why. You fucking asshole!" I said but he chuckled. This annoying bastard he really is something!

"My father told me that I need to study in the States. I didn't want to, but you know how much I respect my father Win. I just... it's just that, I didn't want you guys, especially you, feel sad about me leaving," he brushed his hands though his hair and sighed.

"I told him I'll go but I need to finish my studies first here in Thailand. He agreed but he said that I need to finish as soon as possible because my Aunt there is already processing my papers," he said while staring blankly at the boats nearby.

"But why did you left us hanging Bright? You could've just told us. You know I always understand it even if it means leaving us behind soon," I said frustratingly as he looked at me.

"I really don't like leaving Win. It's like, leaving all the important people around you behind and it's frustrating. That's why I tried to cut all ties from you, and I'm sorry that was my mistake. I'm really sorry," He now faces me with his eyes taunting.

The last time when I stayed in his unit to do our assignments when we were 1st years was when we talked about his parents. His mother died in a car accident when he was still 9. And he talked about how it was really painful to see someone you love disappear.

The pain affected him so much that he became really stressed about everything even his studies were affected. His father told him that it is always okay to be sad about someone leaving, but that doesn't mean your life already stops.

His father taught him to be strong and resilient and Bright really respects how his father overcame that tragic experience they had and made him stronger today.

I was really amazed how Bright became so mature at that young age. That's why he is afraid to make the people important to him feel that way ever again.

But that doesn't mean you need to leave and cut other people because it will just be the same and that is stupid.

"Idiot, you never knew about social media? Videochats? Bastard, you yourself have a Line account!" I said as he is now laughing. What the hell is wrong with this person?

"I'm sorry it took me a long time to think it through," he smiled and I can't see sarcasm in his eyes.

"Yes it took you 2 years to be an idiot," I snorted as I hissed annoyingly. He then pouted and grabbed my arm ushering me where the restaurant is located.

"There are also things I wanted to keep for myself, Win," he said while I follow him as we walk towards the restaurant.

"But not your friends," I smirked, as I try to tease him more.

"Is there another reason why you didn't talk to us?" I tried to stop myself from laughing as I remember his relationship status at that time. Well I have feelings for him that time but it didn't really affect me when I knew he had a girlfriend. I just really don't care. And yes, I rolled my eyes. I'm lying.

He stopped walking and it pulled me out of my reverie. And now he's looking at me with an expression I do not understand. His proud pointed nose, and his pouty lips curving into a suspicious smile.

"I wanted to keep you," he said and shortly went inside the restaurant leaving me standing like a possessed doll.

Wait, what?

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Author's Note

What are your thoughts? Your comments are deeply appreciated guys! 🙏🏻

Thank you for reading and have a nice day ahead! ❤️
-k