I Hate You, Don't Leave Me ~ Nemi

New Beginning

DEMI'S P.O.V.:

It was about two weeks later when I finally decided to make an appointment with who would be my new therapist. I was nervous to meet someone new. People don't usually gets how scared we, celebs, feel when we have to meet a new person who we should "trust". It's not easy. It could end up in leaks and no one wants that.

I glanced at my phone and sighed before grabbing my purse, ready to go to my new therapist's appointment. Max was waiting for me outside and he looked at me through the mirror on a red light.

"Are you nervous?" I smiled and nodded.

"I know I have to trust people but it's just so difficult...like, for real it is." He nodded and I started playing with my fingers.

"Everything will be fine. You have to give her a chance. That's all."

"Yea, I know." I said in a whisper.

We got to the building around 10 minutes later and I walked silently to the reception, where a blonde girl smiled at me.

"Hello Shirley, how are you?"

"I'm fine and you?" I smiled to her.

"Me too. I'm excited to meet the new therapist. You know." She nodded.

"She's actually pretty nice. You're gonna like her. I'm sure about it."

"I hope so." She let me enter to the office and I looked at the girl sitting behind the desk. She had red hair, blue eyes and glasses. It was even intimidating how "hegemonic" she was.

"Hello. Welcome, Demi. It's a pleasure to meet you...finally." I smiled awkwardly to her and nodded.

"It's my pleasure Dr..." I waited for her to tell me her name.

"I'm Brenda Sparks."

"Awesome, Dr. Sparks." She smiled big at me and gestured to the divan in a corner of the room. I was surprised. I didn't usually get divan therapy. "Do I have to lay there? I'm more comfortable with us staring like...face to face. Is there a chance to do it sitting in front of you?"

"Oh yea, absolutely. Take a sit. I just thought you'd rather be on the divan but it's totally okay to just sit here." I sat in front of her and smiled slightly.

"Thanks."

"I don't really have much information about you. Of course, I know some things about you since you're always in the news but...I don't really know, like, the inner you." She said with a shrug. "Do you want to tell me anything about you?"

"Therapeutically, I'm someone who has kind of a pretty shitty past. I think that defines me a lot as a human being. And I come to therapy to change it as much as I can. Cause I know we don't have to live from the past. That's definitely not sane." She nodded slowly and took note on her papers.

"Okay, thank you Demi. Now tell me, you mentioned your past was shitty. Was it because of some people or situations?" I chowed down on my lip and titled my head.

"I think it's a mix of both things. Obviously, there's a lot of situations that were pretty hard for me to experience as a child and as a teenager. I mean, even as an adult. I dealt with awful situations but I think...the people that surrounded me during those situations were an important factor too."

"Yes, definitely. And do you think you've gotten over that people?" I glanced to the ceiling as I thought about the answer and pressed my lips together.

"No, I don't think so. Like, I always say I'm over it but I'm not that over it and I know it every time I see something about that people or related to them. Mostly because...I knew that people way too much. I never expected them to act the way they did with me." She nodded and took her glasses off before leaving them carefully on the desk.

"So, you're telling me that the people who hurt you the most in the past was close to you?"

"Yes, pretty close." She laced her fingers resting her elbows on the desk as she leaned closer to me.

"I'm working with a new therapy. I would like to know if you're interested in it." I frowned at her. "It's a therapy based in facing your past, troubles and everyone who hurt you or who you have unfinished business with...whether if you want to tell good or bad things to them. It's like...letting everything out. Would be down to try it?" I started to feel nervous and shrugged.

"Will I have to see that people face to face?"

"It would be better if you did, but we can try with the most people you can manage to face. I don't wanna pressure you. It's just a choice that you can take or not." I nodded and thought about it while chowing on my lip. Even tho I was pretty anxious about the idea of facing a lot of that people, I nodded. "You want to do it?"

"Yes...I can't promise this is gonna work but, I want to try." She smiled to me with a nod and handed me a paper and a pen. "Can you write those names here? And if you have their numbers, that'd be awesome too."

"Umm, can I do this later?" I asked feeling overwhelmed and she nodded.

"Oh sure, you can send me the list on a text if that works for you."

"Yea, sure. I will."

The rest of the things we talked during the appointment weren't as important to me as the list I had to write. I really put myself in a position I wasn't even sure I could handle later on. It wasn't something easy to do, facing the people who hurt you the most or people you had unfinished business with...that was fucking raw. But I said yes. So after thinking a whole day about whose names I wanted to write on the list, I sent it her way feeling my stomach turn into knots.

Dianna De La Garza
Patrick Lovato
Madison De La Garza
Dallas Lovato
Marissa Callahan
Wilmer Valderrama
Selena Gomez
Taylor Swift
Phil McIntyre
Mike Bayer
Joe Jonas
Nick Jonas