It's Love - Namjoon X Reader

Clear

"Namjoon... its you" The tension within my muscles slowly loosens a little as my mind begins to sober. I lifted my chin to see his dark brown eyes looking down upon me and instantly, the guilt hit my heart. They were sad, just like my own. It reminded me of when we first met that night so long ago, his eyes were sad then as well. He never looked up, his gaze was always towards the ground, yet over time that had begun to change, yet here he stands, gloomy eyed and a frown that made my heart stop a little. 

"Why haven't you called me?" His eyes lift from my own, his pace quickening as we walked up the hill.

"You can put me down Namjoon" I quietly state. 

"No, I don't think I will. Now please, stop avoiding the question". His hands tensed around my body as the signs were clear, he wasn't going to let me go, but he was also very frustrated. 

"Can I tell you when we arrive back home?" I suppose its the time to stop hiding behind the deceit that's been building up all these years.  

"Promise?" 

"Promise"

For a brief few seconds, we remained silent. The night air was cool, yet I knew something was burning within Namjoon's mind, although he seemed calm, there was still annoyance within his body.

"What happened tonight Y/n? I was so worried when your friend called me" He asks directly as his voice pierced through my ears.

"I-I let things get out of hand. I'm sorry, I thought my drinking habits had gotten better, but I guess I was wrong" I confess.

"You didn't get hurt? No one touched you, right?" The concern in his voice was evident, and it pained me to see him so worried about me.

"No, I'm okay. No one touched me like that" I say, resting my head against the front of his shoulder. "I'm okay" 

With a breathy sigh, he continued to walk, his feet slowly becoming heavy. 

As we reached my apartment, Namjoon still held me tight in his arms. Even when seated on the couch, I sat quietly on his lap, his arms still tightly around my waist. He wasn't letting go. Maybe he was afraid I was going to run away again? Maybe I would've if he wasn't holding me so tightly.  

Although he waits for me to speak, I continue to sit silently with a pout upon my face. I felt nervous to speak, but I knew I had to. 

"Namjoon, I need you to know that what I did wasn't your fault. I didn't avoid you because I don't care about you. You understand that right?" I feel quite flustered as I struggle to find air, however, Namjoon hands hold my own and suddenly I feel okay once more. 

He nods his head slightly and I take a deep breath in.

"That man you saw, he is my ex boyfriend. His name is.. his name is Shaw. We met shortly after I left home and he cared and looked after me, however, he was in a much worst state then I was. He was a drug addict and he sold them quite frequently. I didn't think much of it at first, but then there were times.. when he would hurt me accidentally, but, it was never that bad I would tell myself" 

"Y/n..:

"A few years ago, there was one night when the police had been called and were on their way to us. Someone had given info to some detectives that had been after him for quite a bit and he thought I was the one who did it. He became so, so angry and I just didn't know what to do. He came closer and closer, and before I knew it, he had thrown me against the wall.. and I pleaded with him to stop" I lift the hair upon my forehead to reveal a crescent scar that was hidden underneath. "He gave this to me" I say.