It's Love - Namjoon X Reader

A Ghost from the Past

*Flashback*

"Jin, something else has happened to me" I say with a calm voice, staring deep within the void of his pupils. I was going to tell him. I need to tell him, tell someone so they understand.

"What do you mean?" He answers with a quiver as I fail to breathe properly. 

I look away for a second and down the wine that sat in front of me, screwing my nose as I turned my gaze towards him once more. I take a deep breath in, straightening my back and then, I spoke with confidence. 

"Do you remember when you were yelling at me and I fainted?" How could he forget such I thing, I almost feel stupid asking. 

"Y-yes I do, I'm still really sorry about that" His eyes drifting away.

"Well um, that is how my body reacts to certain confrontations, its happened before, heaps actually without you realising it. It's a way for my brain to escape from the thing that is causing me to feel so distressed, a doctor told me so" I feel my heart pounding within my chest that it begins to hurt, but I continue to speak. "You see Jin, I was in a relationship with someone I really cared about, but they were abusive to say the least. He hurt me a lot actually." Its out, I said it. I told someone. It feels as though I can finally breathe for the time in years. 

However, Jin's eyes continue to look deep within my own. He didn't say anything at first, he didn't breathe either. It was if he was having trouble processing what I just said and I mean, I don't blame him, yet somehow I felt euphoric in a sense. 

"Jin?" I say softly, his mind coming back to reality.

"Y/n, I'm so sorry" I can see a glisten within his eyes as tears begin to fall. 

"You have nothing to be sorry for" My voice beginning to shake as I feel my own tears begin to accumulate. 

"Still, I made you feel as though you were going to be hurt again, I can't believe I did that to you. I just.. I'm an idiot" 

"No you're not. I actually think you are one of the most genuine people I know" I wipe away the tears that sit gently bellow my eyes as black makeup smears across my palm. 

"You don't have to answer, but is this man still in a place that he can hurt you?"

I shake my head. "No, hes in prison actually for getting caught handling drugs, I never have to see that asshole again. I moved apartments shortly after he was arrested and changed my phone number, so when he gets out he shouldn't be able to find me"  I say with a sigh of relief. 

"Y/n, I think you should tell Namjoon. I don't think I can handle this much of a secret all on my own" He confesses. 

"I-I will tell him, I promise. Just... just not yet" Such feelings of hurt and fears is what's holding me back. Fear of being hurt once again only just to be left alone in the dark. I care for Namjoon, a lot actually, but I just need time. "I promise, just give me time"

*Present*

My body remains still while my frosted breath leaves my mouth as if I were truly frozen. My blood sat still within my veins and the world around me was becoming blurry as I watched the man walk slowly towards me.