Luke: master yoda, when are we going to start my training??
Yoda: you must learn patience, young skywalker
Luke: but I've been here for three days doing nothing but finding firewood for you to cook your stupid soup!
Yoda: remember, whining leads to the dark side
Luke: I'm not even surprised. Does everything lead to the dark side?!
Obi wan: pretty much
Luke: obi wan why did you have to die, now I have to train with yoda and he won't even let me use my lightsaber to chop wood!
Obi wan: yoda is wise, remember that
Luke: I swear, I'm gonna lose my mind if I have if I have to listen to one more inverted sentence
Yoda: listen to me, you must
Luke: AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH
*luke runs off*
Obi wan: where is he going?
R2: he's probably going to go vandalize something
Obi wan: oh my
Obi wan: did Luke seriously just write "my name is jabba the butt" on Yoda's roof with his lightsaber
R2: yup
Obi wan: now that is the path to the dark side
Yoda: satisfied, are you? By giving in to your anger?
Luke: yeah actually
Luke: can I train now?
Luke: I want to lift some rocks
Yoda: the temperament of his father when he was nine, Luke has
Luke: did you just say I'm nine?
Obi wan: it could've been worse yoda, Luke would never write bad words on your house. Anakin on the other hand...
Yoda: not anymore, does Anakin have any hands. hmhmhmmh
Obi wan: I wonder if it is a skywalker tradition?
Luke: it better not! I'm not losing any of my hands anytime soon
Vader: we'll see about that
Luke: but then I can't make any sandcastles :(
Vader: you are a disappointment to this family
Luke: what do you mean "this family"
Vader: I'm your father
Luke: NOOOOOOO
Obi wan: and leia is your sister
Luke: WHAT
Luke: so basically my whole life is a lie?
Leia: I don't believe this
Vader: believe it
Leia: you're not my dad! Ugly ass kriffin egghead
Vader: you watch your language young lady!
Obi wan: I see that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree
Han: I need to get off this planet
Han: you people are crazy
Han: adios bitchachos
YOU ARE READING
Star Wars Texts
HumorMost of this is clone wars 😎 Get ready for some chaos in the galaxy. Stupidity commencing in 3...2...1...
