Nozomi (english)| Detective Conan ff | Heiji (Kazuha)

What About You

"Do you think they will come soon?" Kazuha asked, while the wind blew through her hair. Heiji stood next to her bored on a bridge and looked at his watch. "I don't know... They should be here soon."

Silence fell between them. It was in the early afternoon and the sun was shining on the earth."Would you mind to tell me something about them? I would hate to be completely clueless about them, since they remember me as a friend." she asked cautiously, with the fear in the back of her mind to be an annoying burden for the men. 

She had reasons to have such doubts. Heiji did not had a satisfied expression most of the time. But that wasn't because Kazuha annoyed him. It was the whole situation that let him down. He couldn't influence Kazuha's healing process and that was so frustrating to him.

Heiji looked at her pitifully: "Well, what can I say... They know each other since childhood and are married. They are in our age and have a little son named Conan. Shinichi is a famous detective in Tokyo and Ran works as a teacher. We know them since 10 years"

Their live mirrored their own live which hit Heiji unpleasantly.

"Married, then..." she hesitated."I...I know this is a strange question but... Do you know why I'm not married... Or maybe I was, but had a divorce?" she suddenly asked.Heiji suddenly became nervous. What could he answer now? He didn't know that such simple questions could cause so much pain."Why do you think you're not married?" he asked asked instead to avoid an answer.She hesitated again, like she had the fear of saying something wrong.

"Well... I mean, if I were married, you wouldn't take care of me, would you? No one but you came, so I must be alone..." she replied only softly and depressed.

"Maybe." Heiji replied. He couldn't lie to her. Eventually everything would come out anyway, and the more he lied the stronger the pain would be later.Kazuha apparently accepted the vague answer."Tell me... Do you have someone? A girlfriend?" she asked with a smile to suppress her own doubts.Heiji blushed slightly and stared at her with eyes wide open. "Well... uhm... I had someone once. That girl was very important to me and I loved her more than anything."Kazuha looked at him with big eyes. "Why 'once'? What happened?"

Heiji got quite overwhelmed because of her sudden curiosity and looked at her embaressed and slightly shocked. But it wasn't that unexpected. She's always been incredibly curious. 

"I made a huge mistake. I lost her. I wasn't paying attention and she got in trouble because of me. And I still don't know if she has ever forgiven me, and how she feels about me," Heiji expressed his thoughts and doubts directly.

"Why don't you just ask her?" she said naive.
"I would lie saying I like it that, but I hope some day I will get that chance to do so. For now it is impossible." he replied bluntly and looked away because he couldn't look her in the eyes anymore. "Sorry... I think I should stop asking questions. I'm just hurting you with this all the time", she apologized."No, don't think something like that. ... "I'm sure I'll meet her someday and she'll be able to tell me everything that's on her mind," he protested immediately.Kazuha just looked at him with big eyes. "I am sure she will forgive you. You are a good person and she will lose something if she doesn't."

she said with blushed cheeks.

There it was again... The rising warmth in his stomach he hadn't felt in years."I hope so, too, because I'd lose something much more precious if I didn't." he whispered to himself.The conversation had resulted in an uncomfortable murky silence. But fortunately it was soon interrupted.