UNCONDITIONAL

XXIV

"Prem." His aunt took a weak walk over to him and placed her hand on his shoulder, almost startling him.

He looked up to see tears in her eyes. She took a seat next to him and opened her arms for him. He looked at her for a moment before putting his head on her shoulder and letting her take him in a hug. They sat silently in the hug for a few moments before he proceeded withdraw and sit on the floor next to her placing his head on her lap. She placed one of her hands on the side of his face and ran the other one in his hair. A tear poured out of one of his eyes and she wiped it with her thumb before leaning forward to place a kiss on his forehead. "My beautiful baby..." She whispered as she reached up to wipe her tear away as well.

"Tayiji...why us?" Prem managed as another tear spilled out of his eye. He couldn't align his thoughts in that moment let alone words and she understood that.

"I wish I knew, baby." She sniffled caressing his face as she did when he was a baby. Her hands placed around him like she would protect him from anything and everything. She let him hold onto her like she did every time he was vulnerable and broken down by the world and life, her pose telling the universe itself, that any harm headed to him would have to fight and defeat her first. "I wish I knew." She repeated in a deep sigh.

Prem looked up at her with helpless eyes. "First our families, then the siblings we raised like our children, and as if that wasn't enough, separation between Noor and I. Why? What did we do to deserve that?"

"I don't know." His aunt sobbed. "I really don't know baby. Why us? I don't know." She wiped his cheek before reaching up to wipe her own. "I can't imagine what Noor must be going through. She has died in guilt every single waking second of her life in the past two years. She has hated herself; she has hated life and more than anything else, she has allowed you to hate her." Bhuji put her hand over her mouth again to control her sobs. Prem dug his face in the shawl on her lap and let his tears of remorse pour out on her lap at the thought of Noor. Somewhere between their tears, the sleepless night came to an end.

The next morning, their sulking house woke up and morning routines lazily began and finished for everyone but Noor never came out of her room. Prem was requested by his Tayiji to go speak to her. She wanted them both to accompany her to the Gurdwara that day and she knew only Prem could convince Noor to come along. Prem hadn't taken the time to completely clarify his thoughts let alone try and figure what ran through Noor's mind. He couldn't say no to his aunt, so he headed over to Noor's room after breakfast. He reached for the doorknob but hesitated and ended up retrieving his hand. Instead, he knocked on her door. When no reply came, he opened the door to see Noor seated on the couch staring at the fireplace burning before her. He took a deep breath before shutting the door behind him and going over to take a seat next to her on the couch. Noor was unfazed by his presence. She didn't as much as blink when he sat down.

He cleared his throat. "Noor..."

She slowly turned her face to look at him. Her eyes were swollen and there was no color in her face. Prem opened his mouth slightly to say something but just couldn't find any words. Instead he simply looked back at her. He stared at her until her cold eyes came out the trance, realized who they were looking at, and filled up to the brim. "Prem..." She mouthed breaking down as he reached forward and took her in his arms. For the first time in two years, her cries rang so powerfully throughout the house that they reminded every wall and every human within them of the tragedy that took place this day. The pain in her deafening screams sent chills down Prem's spine, penetrating deep into his soul.

Peter, who was setting up Bhuji's bed when Noor's wailing voice entered his ears, dropped everything at once and panicked turning to head out and check on her.

"Let her cry, Peter. Let them mourn." Bhuji stopped him from leaving. "It's time she lets it all out. It's time they let it out. They've kept it locked in for far too long. I knew it would only come out when they find each other's arms. Waheguru." She folded her hands looking upwards.

Prem felt as if the air had been knocked out of his lungs. Tears flooded down his cheeks as he held onto Noor as tightly as could. Seconds ticked on and became minutes as they cried holding onto each other recalling the tragedy, the loss, the two years that followed, and finally the fact revealed by Harleen last night.

"I'm sorry." Noor finally was able to say in between her sobs. "I'm so sorry, Prem. I'm so sorry."

Prem swallowed to bring his mouth in a condition to say something. "You didn't do it on purpose." He managed.

"I didn't!" Noor wept, "but does that make it okay? Will that bring back Arman?" She could barely form her words. "Will that..." she moved up her shivering hands to cup his face, "will that erase the image of me shooting your brother from your mind?" She let her hands collapse down into his lap.

Prem simply cried in response. He didn't have an answer for her.

"I miss her so much." Noor threw her arms around his neck once again, unleashing a whole different flood of emotions. "I miss them so much, Prem."

"I miss him too, Noor." Prem dug his face into her neck and put his arms around her back again. "I miss both of them too."

They cried and cried some more. With none of them in a hurry to separate, they held onto each other and cried until they had no more tears left. They poured their hearts out and just when they were heading to a finish, their aunt joined them to initiate the conversation she had been holding back for months now. A conversation that went on to cover everything from them and their relationship to how their siblings must be withering in pain wherever they are to see the two people they loved most suffering because of them.

"Don't you wish for them to rest in peace?" She cried to both of them. "No one knew them more than you two. How do you guys think they feel seeing both of you like this? Happy? They were literally carbon copies of you two, how would you feel if they were here in your place and you were in theirs? Would you be very happy to see them suffering? No, you wouldn't be at peace for a single second!"

They both slowly shook their heads in denial.

"Then for the sake of your siblings, please! I beg of you, please sort out your differences and give me my Noor and Prem back. Give me back their smiles, their laughs, their love for one another. Give me a reason to live again. Because quite frankly, I would prefer death over this life." She sobbed as they took her in their arms.

"We'll fix this bhuji. I promise." Noor sniffled, holding onto her tightly.

"Don't say that Tayiji, please." Prem wiped his cheek as well. "It really is time we fix it." He looked down at his aunt and then over at Noor.

His aunt kissed them both as the final tears in all three pairs of eyes poured out. That day got to witness two shattered hearts pick up their pieces once again. The defeated warriors were beginning to gather their weapons again to fight the battle of life one more time. They spent the rest of the day at the Gurdwara with their aunt praying for peace upon those who have left and among those who stay.