Wistful

Chapter 3 - I Need A Change

(Kadynce's POV)

Tomorrow is the day.

Tomorrow is the day that I get to see my family.

After over six years, I get to finally hug them and kiss them. And I for one couldn't wait.

Although, I was really, really nervous about them meeting my babies. I haven't told them anything about me being pregnant once, never mind twice. They think it's just me and Jake who are coming. They wouldn't even think to factor in my two children.

I would have told them about them, but Jake told me that if I tell them about their grandchildren then they'll want to pay us some visits and he told me that he doesn't have time for that. He doesn't have time for my family to be butting their noses in our business.

But it doesn't matter now because tomorrow they will know.

Just like my daily routine, the routine that I have gone by every day for the past six and a half years, I headed to work after dropping off the kids. Happy to work all the days that Jake is off, otherwise he would have me home alone, which he rarely ever does. I made sure that never happened. He always has a set schedule, so I know exactly what to tell my manager.

"Hey Kady, how's your morning going?" Steven asked me as I walked into my work building.

Every day he is so happy and carefree about life, how I used to be. Now, I walk through life numb and afraid to live; afraid to stand up for myself in times of pain and hurt. The only way I have been able to live through everything since him is because of Nikkol and Jason.

I forced a smile and a laugh. "Couldn't be better." I lied.

Jake was in a mood this morning, the way that he has been since he found the wedding invitation last week. I have been walking on eggshells ever since, always making sure that I have his food ready and the kids ready on time. Luckily, my babies didn't see him in his temper tantrum otherwise I wouldn't know what I would do.

I love them too much to expose them to that kind of behavior.

Part of me feels that Nikkol and Jason know exactly when Jason is in his moods, they always stay clear of him. But I also notice they steer clear of him anyway, he doesn't exactly go out of his way to speed time with them, not even Jason. The only time he speaks to Jason is when he is chastising him.

Jason barely likes his father as it is and I don't want him growing up with those kinds of memories in his head, he deserves more than that, Nikkol deserves more than that. I have always tried to have Jake and Jason bond, even from birth, but Jake never even took the initiative to have a relationship with his son.

He didn't even show up for Jason's birth.

Clocking in at exactly nine-thirty on the dot I got myself ready for the day.

My break came quickly as my morning went by in a breeze, no one gave me weird looks or asked about how I was. I hated answering those questions because I hated lying to co-workers, or just people in general.

Especially, my family. And my Daddy...

I love him and miss him so much. Every day I wish that we were under better circumstances, but I can't tell him. I'm too afraid of what Jake might do if he found out. I know that all I have to do is to make one call, and me and my babies are home free, but I'm scared. I'm scared of Jake's reaction and I'm scared of how he will retaliate if I leave with his son.

He threatened me before, telling me that if I ever tried to leave he would do much worse to me than what he's done. Adding that he will find a way to take Jason back.