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"Dahyun?" Momo called out, fumbling with her phone before dropping it to the floor and ending the call.

The sound of it falling echoed in the small, barely-fitting-two-people bar bathroom Momo was in, an almost empty bottle of vodka accompanying her on the floor.

"How did you find me?" she hiccuped as the younger stood above her, face twisted in an expression of confusion.

"My classmate works here, she called me," Dahyun said slowly while awkwardly flipping her hair to the side as she kneeled down "What's wrong?"

"I don't know." Momo whined, knocking over the bottle of alcohol. Her back and head resting behind her on the wall while she closed her eyes, bringing her knees up to her chest.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Honestly, no. I don't," Momo sighed "But I know if I don't do anything about it, it will it eat me from the inside out." she spoke, head falling on her knees.

"About what?" Dahyun asked, now kneeled down in front of the drunk girl, hands on either sides of her legs. "Mina?"

"Yes," the older groaned "And all this crap inside my head that won't get the f-fuck out."

"And was is that crap, Momo?" Dahyun questioned as she moved her hand on top of the brunette's right knee "Talk to me."

The brunette shook her head, feet anxiously tapping on the tiled floor. The sound of her shoes relentlessly moving up and down, drowning the one of her heavy breathing. She suddenly felt helpless, pathetic, and weak.

"Momo, look at me," Dahyun softly said, the hand that was on her right knee now moving on top of her head "What do you feel?"

Weak.

That's what Momo wanted to shout. She really wanted to let the girl kneeled before her know, she wanted to scream how it made her scared at the top of her lungs. Momo wanted to get rid of the feeling, shout and cry until her body gave out. Until she wouldn't feel weak anymore.

"Bottling up your feelings isn't good. You've done it enough already," the younger whispered, pale fingers running through brown locks "You have to face it, whatever is keeping you attached to her."

Dahyun was so on point, Momo thought. Though she would've done it, face what kept her attached to Mina, if she could. She would've done everything just so she wouldn't feel like this, weak.

"That's the thing, Dahyun-ah," Momo spoke in a groggy voice, slightly gagging at the smell of her own breath and the after taste of the alchohol "I don't fucking know what that thing is. I don't know what is making me jealous everytime she tries to move on."

And maybe it was the alcohol in her system, but she really wanted to call Mina again. Call and demand an answer to everything, make herself strong again.

"Moving on," the younger breathed out "It scares you?"

"Of course it fucking does," Momo mumbled to herself "Without her I'm weak, I can't do shit for my own and since she left me it has been getting so much worse."

That was Momo's biggest fear, depending on others and becoming weak. Not being able to pick herself back up when the one she shared the weight on her shoulders with bailed on her, and maybe that's her biggest mistake. It runs in the family, Momo reckoned. It runs in the family depending on someone so much that when they leave, you're left alone to carry four times the weigt on you shoulders, especially when leaving without an explanation.

"Then we should work on that," Dahyun spoke as she lifted Momo's head "You should work on that, gain your strength back."

Her and her mother had so much in common as it seemed. Both left by their lovers without a word. Momo with just 'We can't do this anymore' and with her mother, a note.

I know right. A stupid, fucking note?

And what it wrote was even more ridiculous, 'I'm sorry for this, but it wasn't meant to be. It was all a mistake. Tell our daughter I love her.'

Of course Momo's mother didn't tell her, why would she? Why would she give fake hope to an innocent and young child?

"I don't know how I'm supposed to do this," Momo sighed "Look at me, it's been years and I'm still not over it while she's there making out with your best friend."

But maybe her mother had to let her know while also informing her on how to be less like her, self destructive. Because if she did, chances are she wouldn't be living a life where her worst nightmare had come true.

"Do you still love her?" words spilled from Dahyun's mouth, falling all over Momo. Like the rain, it soaked her. It soaked her in disgusting and dirty water, clinging onto her skin and never letting go. Those words were equal to the nasty flu you will catch after being caught in a rainstorm. And just like your bones that will ache and head that will throb, your heart will sink. It will slow down it's own beating as a self defence mechanism so you won't have a heart attack and will remind you how complicated humans are, because love feels odd. It will remind you that even if the smartest individual on the planet, you will always be unsure of your feelings. Even just a little bit.

"No, I don't," the brunette said, shaking her head as if trying to get the 'raindrops' off of her "I think I don't."

Dahyun nodded, forehead resting against the older's as she took a deep breath in. It was hard, moving on. But she somehow had to get over it and Dahyun was there to help her.

That's why she was now making the craziest proposal she had ever done in her life, potentially risking itーher life that is.

"Then talk to her, Momo," Dahyun said "Talk to Mina and end this. End the pain in here." she spoke, aggressively poking at the space in her chest where her heart was supposed to be.

-kimwig

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