Small (Yoongi's Sister BTS Fanfic)

48 | Brother

      Jimin feels his fingers curling around the edge of the tabletop and tightening like a vice; every ounce of tension sinking into his hands and turning his knuckles white. His lungs threaten to collapse in on themselves, but pure obstinance on Jimin's part keep them working like they should. It's a struggle to keep his breathing even, every inhale like a thousands needles poking holes in his chest, but somehow he manages it.

      Jimin wants to go home. He wants to hide in his room and refuse to come out until every last bit of this exhausting feeling is gone. But life just doesn't work like that.

      "I wish she worked with us so I wouldn't have to worry myself to death every time she walks away." Yoongi murmurs, his tone subdued with honesty. Jimin can't tear his eyes off the floor, but he can imagine the fire of brotherly-protectiveness gleaming in his hyung's eyes, "I bet PD-nim would hire her if I asked him to. And it doesn't hurt that she's so musically talented. She would fit right in at Bighit!"

      Jimin feels his bottom lip tremble as another wave of thoughts crashes over him, and he fiercely bites down on it to stop the subtle movement. The pain of the bite feels insignificant to the stabbing pain in his chest, but Jimin will take any small distraction that he can get. Anything to help him forget how weak he is to his own mind. How much of a coward he is.

      "I should talk to PD-nim about it," Yoongi hums thoughtfully, voice rumbling deep in his chest, "It's best to be prepared, even if Byeol-ah refuses to leave her job for a while. If you and the guys back me up, it won't take very long to get Bang to agree, I'm sure. I have more than enough time to talk to him today-- Jiminie, are you free right now? Would you mind going with me to petition for PD-nim's favor?"

       Jimin's head hurts. His fingers shake.

      "Jiminie? Are you list--" Yoongi's voice cuts out, replaced by a low sound of anxious surprise. A large, warm hand settles over one of Jimin's own, and Yoongi's voice drifts through his ears like a cool breeze, "Jimin-ah? What's wrong? Talk to me-- hyung's here for you."

      If only it were that easy.

      Jimin wishes he could tape his mouth shut and spare his poor hyung from all of the ridiculous nonsense floating around inside his consciousness, but keeping it all inside burns like acid. He knows that no matter how much effort he puts into keeping quiet, Yoongi will somehow manages to get him to open up. He knows that the truth always comes out- no matter how painful. So he figures-- why not get it over with?

      "I'm s-sorry, hyung." Jimin's voice is weak, pathetic, and riddled with cracks, "I really am. I didn't m-mean to do it, honest. I didn't even know it would be a p-problem until it was already too late!"

      Jimin somehow finds the courage to lift his eyes up from the floor, and to Yoongi's credit, the only thing that gives away the pale rapper's confusion is the swirl of bewilderment dancing in the pools of his eyes.

       "I meant t-to tell you earlier." Jimin chokes out, his vision fogging over. He doesn't want to know just how ugly he looks as the tears start rolling down his cheeks, "I didn't w-want you to find out like this, hyung. I wanted to do it p-p-properly. I wanted to ask you. P-please don't hate me, hyung. Please d-don't push me away."

      Jimin wishes he was brave. He wishes he could've mustered up the courage to ask his best friend if it was okay to date his little sister. If only he'd done that yesterday, or the day before, then none of this would've happened.

      "Jimin-ah, you're not making any sense." Yoongi's so gentle, even when Jimin's wronged him beyond belief. The thought of his hyung hating him makes Jimin's eyes tear up even faster, panic eating him from the inside, but Yoongi squeezes Jimin's hand in reassurance, "Whatever you did, hyung won't abandon you because of it. It doesn't matter what you've done, hyung will always love you, Jimin-ah. I can't say that I won't be upset with you if you've really done something wrong, but I will never hate you, or push you away. So please, help me understand."