Taking A Chance on Love (Book 1 Of The Tombstone Brides)

Chapter 11.

I was so nervous, as I stood there leaning against the doorpost of Jordans black Smith shop. Would he like me? Would he come to call me Mama? Would he accept Katie? All these questions kept bouncing around in my head. I soon got my answer when around the corner came Jordan's young son, or at least I shall call him my son as I am now his new mother. I guess he didn't like the announcement that Jordan told him for he barreled his way around the corner and slammed into me. I was momentarily stunned for a second, but I didn't allow him to keep on running. I held onto him tightly, even though he was wiggling with anger and frustration I knew in my heart that someday he would get over his anger and embrace me. I Looked to Jordan and I gave him the silent look asking him if it was okay for me to embrace Logan. Jordan just nodded at me and smiled, as he held tightly to Katie who was asleep in his arms. I sighed heavily and knelt down to my knees and placed my hands upon Logan's arms as I was waiting for him to calm down. After a while he did but he refused to look into my eyes, so I waited patiently for him to do as I asked.

"It is okay Logan, you don't have to address me, as your mama, I would never even think to replace your mother. I hope though that one day you and I can become friends and that you will become a big brother to my daughter, Katie. Will you do that for me? Will you be a big brother to Katie?" I asked him.

He just stood there with his hands folded behind his back and his foot digging into the dirt floor with his head bowed down, I wanted to look into his eyes so I took my finger and I lifted his chin up and I asked him the question again. "Will you become Katie's Big Brother?" He nodded and I smiled. "I'm glad", I said as I wrapped my arms around his small body and hugged him.

He looked back to his father and sighed, "can I go now, Daddy?" Jordan heaved a sigh and nodded his head, "go ahead son, you can go and play for now but don't forget that after dinner you'll be doing some chores."
He said as he switched arms when holding Katie. I approached my new husband and held my hands out to him, "do you want me to hold her for a while?" He shook his head, "no. It's alright darling she's not that heavy, I remember how it was or how it felt when Logan was a little baby. It's actually quite refreshing, I get to hold an infant again thank you for that." 

I smiled. "Your welcome," I said as I leaned into him and placed a kiss on his cheek. "Come!" He said as he placed his arm around my shoulders, I leaned into him for a few seconds and relished in the feeling of comfort and security assurance. It felt good to cuddle again, granted I had that with Nathan as well, especially after we married but those feelings soon dwindled right after the effects of being disowned and ignored by his family affected Nathan's feelings. I remember a little while later when we had our first argument.

It was after I discovered that I was pregnant with Katie, I was so ecstatic, so excited about the news that I excitedly anticipated Nathan getting home from work. But as soon as the words with child burst from my lips- I knew that Nathan was unhappy to hear about it. I regretted telling him the news because no sooner did I say the words that Nathan accused me of ruining his life, and that it was my fault that he was disowned.

I stood there in shock as I stood in the entrance of our front foyer and looked into his eyes. "How could you even say that?" I asked him in disbelief. I was not the type of woman to tolerate any form of abuse especially if it had nothing to do with me.

Why do men do that? I wondered. When things don't go their way they instantly blame us - the womenfolk. It was not my decision to disobey his grandparents before he eloped with me. I warned him that we would face tremendous obstacles if we did marry because I was a little bit below his station.

My family wasn't entirely poor, but we are not from the bluestocking, we were what you would call new money. But in the eyes of the Gentry we were worms to them, dirt below their feet, and no matter how much we wanted to become one of them - we would never be accepted.